Do i even count?

[BobbieCrescent]

Maybe it's a bit, or a lot, selfish, but this whole 'national coming out day' got me thinking... Do i even count as someone that 'comes out'?

I mean, i just want to be pretty sometimes. I know i'm not ever going to actually be mistaken for a woman, i don't have any desire to transition, and i'm otherwise a pretty normal huge nerd.

Would my 'coming out' make more trouble than it's worth? Would it seem like i'm just trying to steal the spotlight or something like that? Many questions, few answers. I'd love to hear your thoughts.

[Cynthia Anne]

Hi Sweetheart! Yes you count! You are just as important as any one else! Now as far as 'coming out', you do what you are comfortable with! Never be pressured into anything you don't want to do! YOU just be happy with yourself! Enjoy what you do best! Hugs!

[CamilleLeon]

Coming out is a choice that you make if you feel like it's relevant to those around you. If you feel like explaining that you're a crossdresser would help your friends understand you better than it's probably worth it...if you're worried it'd just drive you apart then it might not be worth doing. It's really all up to you cause most people won't press it unless you bring it up yourself

[NathalieX66]

Hi Bobbie,
Yes, you do count.
Coming out is not for everybody.
I came aout to a bunch of my friends, and fortunately some of my closest friends are supportive. in fact i have been asked to be en femme if I wanted to. very cool!
My parents have seen a few of my photos, and they just think it's what I did for halloween, but I really have mixed feelings about telling my complete story, mainly because I fear dissapointing them, for all they've done to help me.
In my professional life, under no circumstance must anyone know this side of me. My field is too small, an everyone knows everybody via the the old boy network. So that's that.
I have met quite afew who have made the transition, or are ongoing the transition, and life is often challenging, to say the least. It sucks to be betrayed by those close to you.
The average person does not understand what it's like to be transgender.

I'm lucky I'm a part time girl that goes out in public 1-4 times a month, who is already doing beard hair removal, and I get enough flak from my company president for growing my hair long.
So there are challenges. .....so I decided to take a certain amount of lumps from other people that I can tolerate to be happy.

[Daphne Renee]

Yes you count. Telling yourself you dont would just mean you were worth less than someone else. No as far as coming out. You have to decide that on your own. I wish you the best of luck.

[Karren H]

Personally I can't imagine why you would want to come out for some national event? Its your life. Live it as you want not as some organizer thinks you should. I'm starting a "National Leave Me the F#*k Alone Day". Who's with me? Lol.

[Carol A]

Hay Karren, I am. I agree with you leave me the F alone to live my life as I want.

[NicoleScott]

I'm with you Karren.

It seems to me that those advocating coming out are doing so to advance their own agenda, not for what's best for others.

Now leave me the f#*k alone.

[Karren H]

Hay Karren, I am. I agree with you leave me the F alone to live my life as I want.

Maybe I need to rethint this... If everyone wants to be left alone.... Then no way do they want anyone to joind them on NLMTFA day?? Lol.

[CynthiaD]

I'm starting a "National Leave Me the F#*k Alone Day". Who's with me? Lol.

Sounds like my kind of day. Count me in.

And yeah Bobby, you count. Don't do anything unless you want to. If you do come out, do it with attitude. Walk around proud, as if to say "Hey, I'm the cool one! You guys in pants are the weirdos!"

[Tina B.]

Bobbi, you count, you are a real person, so you count, but as for coming out, that is something you do if there is a reason that you need to come out to complete yourself, but never do it, for others, or because a movement says you should. The movement does not live your life. If there are consequences for coming out, you are the one that will pay.
Karren, I would love to join that movement, if there are no meetings, no emails, or other correspondence. And no one keeps a membership list.
Tina B.

[xristy]

Bobbie,

I think the real thing to consider is that coming out means a lot of different things. First off, some people haven't even come out to themselves. So the first step in coming out is accepting who you are. For some people, this is something they have already done and others it takes years to understand who they are and accept themselves for who they are. That is the most important aspect of coming out, in my mind. If you can't accept yourself for who you are, you really can't come out to others.

Once you have accepted yourself, you will need to decide if you want to poke your toe out a little more and come out to the rest of the world or only a small segment. This is your decision alone and only you should make this decision for yourself. If you do decide to progress and let others into your world, I wish you the best of luck. It can be both positive and negative, just depends on you and the people in your life.

In short, you do count. Most importantly, you count the most. Be honest with yourself first and then you can really figure out where to go from there.

Xristy

[Jackiefl]

Karren sign me up or whatever lol

[*Vanessa*]

Absolutely you count, without questions!

You may need to write some of your questions down on a pro/con sheet to help you sort them out. None of us know you well enough to know how one Q would effect the people close to you and how they would reflect back at you. I think that's what I am reading anyway <Q-eyes>. To come out for a National Day alone would probably be not a good idea (the context of the Q and how it is stated makes me say that).

We all know what it's like to want to feel pretty, to express who we are, to show the wold. Yet, most of us don't and for as many reasons as there are CDers. Maybe there are deeper feelings coursing through your mind?

Maybe, taking this date and using it as a kick-off to find the answer for next year would be a better more achievable goal for you.

[kimdl93]

Personally I can't imagine why you would want to come out for some national event? Its your life. Live it as you want not as some organizer thinks you should. I'm starting a "National Leave Me the F#*k Alone Day". Who's with me? Lol.

I certainly wouldn't come out because someone else says its a good idea. But then I used to light a cigar (I don't smoke) on the national smoke out day.

the bigger question is whether you have any need or reason to come out to friends, family or anyone else. those of us who have done so, generally felt compelled to do so by our own needs.

[Kittyagain]

Bobbie I will join in with the others, yes you count; National coming out day does not.

Kitty

[rebecca.cross2]

We all "count". Dont let a national event make the decision for you. It is a personal choice. Some come out, many do not. It is up to you, and be wise with whatever choice you make.