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Thread: I've Had a Bit of a Revelation Lately.....

  1. #1
    Slip Into Something Femme Piora's Avatar
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    I've Had a Bit of a Revelation Lately.....

    As some of you might be aware, I have crossdressed in the past strictly for sexual purposes. Afterward, I would no longer desire to remain in my female clothing.

    Recently, that has changed, and I'm a bit surprised. While I still get a sensual pleasure from dressing, I have a much diminished desire to do anything more than to enjoy being dressed.

    It seemed to start when I received my French Maid Uniform in the mail a week or two ago. After I finished putting it on, I loved being in it, and I wore it for the whole afternoon without....well....you know. And I've been doing that ever since. I never had a desire to get 'outerwear' - dresses, shoes, skirts, blouses etc. And I do now. I seem to have passed into a new stage, after dressing for 34 years. I feel that I now want to spend time just being enfemme....to feel pretty and feminine.

    It seems that those members on the site who predicted this happening were right. It's a new era, that I am looking forward to greatly!

  2. #2
    Senior Member KellyJameson's Avatar
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    Excellant post! I admire the courage to be honest greatly.

  3. #3
    Princess Candice candykowal's Avatar
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    I am sure there are a lot of us who went through the same revelation.
    I still want to make love dressed el femme with my wife,but as of today, she doesn't know about Candy...*sigh*
    Candice Coleen Kowal ....all my friends call me Candy!

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    Full-Time Duality NathalieX66's Avatar
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    Hi Piora, great story!.

    Could it finally be that the "existential" aspect of femininity has overtaken the "sexual" aspect?

  5. #5
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    I think the vast majority of us older members have gone through a maturing of our personna. Yes, as a horny teenager, I dressed with sexual motivation. Maybe with aging there is a change in hormones that affect how we process sexual desires. My en femme attire reflects my age. Being over sixty does not require granny dresses. I think I made the transition into full "womanhood" when I started buying dresses to go with my many slips.

    PS: In the past I had a yearning for a French Maid outfit. Now I just like to do the customary domestic chores in a pretty dress. If my wife were to ever participate in my cross dressing, I'd never acquiesce to wearing such an outfit anymore. I'd be dressed in a white blouse, black skirt, black stockings and black heels. That ensemble goes better with my grey hair and age.

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    Amazing, I wonder what happened to make this transition. Very cool Piora

    So is there something else that the maid outfit represents, not really in a Freudian was but pure emotional or maybe a scent?
    Curious.

  7. #7
    Gold Member Cynthia Anne's Avatar
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    I say welcome to womanhood!haha I too beleive this is a rather frequent happening! And if most would be honest one may be surprized of how frequent it is! Hopeing the best for you! Hugs!
    If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:

  8. #8
    Member Toni Citara's Avatar
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    Once you get past the "horndog" reaction to crossdressing, and you reach a new plateau, you will find your center. I cannot explain how it happens, it just does... and it sounds like you are finding your center in life. Bless your heart, and I hope you become comfortable with who you are as a person and can stop the demons from haunting you.
    “They’re not women’s clothes. They’re my clothes. I bought them.” (Eddie Izzard)

  9. #9
    Slip Into Something Femme Piora's Avatar
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    Thanks everyone.

    I am really looking forward to this new outlook I have, and how different I feel.

    Quote Originally Posted by KellyJameson View Post
    Excellent post! I admire the courage to be honest greatly.
    Well, thank you....nice of you to say so.

    Quote Originally Posted by NathalieX66 View Post
    Hi Piora, great story!.

    Could it finally be that the "existential" aspect of femininity has overtaken the "sexual" aspect?
    Oh, I do indeed. As mentioned, my daughter (sadly) is moving out to start on her life with her long-time boyfriend. While this will no doubt be hard for me, as I will greatly miss her, I do look forward to being able to be dressed and also have free run of my place, and to go about what I usually do when I relax...only a lot of the time I can be enfemme.

    Quote Originally Posted by Stephanie47 View Post
    I think the vast majority of us older members have gone through a maturing of our personna. Yes, as a horny teenager, I dressed with sexual motivation. Maybe with aging there is a change in hormones that affect how we process sexual desires. My en femme attire reflects my age. Being over sixty does not require granny dresses. I think I made the transition into full "womanhood" when I started buying dresses to go with my many slips.
    We're roughly the same age, Stephanie, and like you, I don't want to dress "my age" either. I'm looking forward to sexy cocktail dresses, short skirts and other frilly, girlish items! It looks like I have to relive my youth again....only in girl mode this time!

    Quote Originally Posted by *Vanessa* View Post
    .
    Amazing, I wonder what happened to make this transition. Very cool Piora

    So is there something else that the maid outfit represents, not really in a Freudian was but pure emotional or maybe a scent?
    Curious.
    Well.......I do have a theory. This is the very first dress - albeit a French Maid Outfit - that I have ever owned. I think when I saw myself in the mirror, I just felt very pretty and feminine....and there was little room for much in the way of sexual feelings. I suppose that I enjoyed seeing myself so transformed.

    Lately, I have felt a need to be dressed....now, no longer for those prior reasons - but to experience the joy of my feminine side, while going about the things I would normally do dressed in drab. It's really something that has been a long time coming. I think Crossdressers.com has had a lot to do with it. Ever since I found this site, I have felt such belonging....just being so much a part of something that I think is very, very special.
    Last edited by Piora; 10-20-2011 at 11:14 PM.

  10. #10
    Female Illusionist! docrobbysherry's Avatar
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    I've been WAITING for this same evolution, Piora! After being stuck in the dressing, "horndog" stage for 14 years. If I'm like u, I'll have to wait 20 more years to move on!

    Let's see. That will make me 80+ y/o! Definitely time to stop being a "horndog". I just CAN'T WAIT!
    U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.

    Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!

  11. #11
    Gold Member erickka's Avatar
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    It sounds like you have moved into the area where you will feel the pleasures of, and appreciate the finer side of wearing dresses, heels , hose, etc. That happened to me about 15 or so years ago, (ye old horndog left the building) now I just relish feeling and trying to be pretty!

  12. #12
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    Good post Piora, it shows you are in control of your emotions and conscious of where you are in your gender enhancement. You have also come to realize some of us continue to evolve and that evolution is controlled by our subconscious and our genetic structure. It's sort of like taking a ride on a leaf down a river to places unknown. Enjoy your ride girl.

  13. #13
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    Piora, yes it has happened to me as well. Like you, I am happy to be at this level as it seems you are too.

    It is indeed like another step up in our world. Be careful, the pink fog can be thicker but it is easier to find your way out. As so many have posted, it is the balance that is important.

    Something new to wear is still exciting. I hope that never goes away don't you?

    Kitty

  14. #14
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    one of the best things about dressing is the totaly relaxed feeling and not so much the sex

  15. #15
    Slip Into Something Femme Piora's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by erickka View Post
    It sounds like you have moved into the area where you will feel the pleasures of, and appreciate the finer side of wearing dresses, heels , hose, etc. That happened to me about 15 or so years ago, (ye old horndog left the building) now I just relish feeling and trying to be pretty!
    Yes, the desire to wear dresses and skirts is very new for me. I would read many posts in the Clothing Accessories & Shopping Talk and in the Picture & Video Gallery about some of the joys of buying new dresses, skirts and other items that I had never thought of myself wearing. Now I can picture myself wearing items like those, and I just need to find a way to get courage enough to shop for those things in stores.

    Quote Originally Posted by jillleanne View Post
    Good post Piora, it shows you are in control of your emotions and conscious of where you are in your gender enhancement. You have also come to realize some of us continue to evolve and that evolution is controlled by our subconscious and our genetic structure. It's sort of like taking a ride on a leaf down a river to places unknown. Enjoy your ride girl.
    I like that...."gender enhancement". Good choice of words, Jillleanne. Because for me - that's exactly what it is. I want to wear things that will bring out that part of me that needs to be expressed. I'm seriously looking forward to the ride!

    Quote Originally Posted by Kittyagain View Post
    Piora, yes it has happened to me as well. Like you, I am happy to be at this level as it seems you are too.
    Believe me, it is a strange sensation. It seems that I was obviously happy enough at the time....feeling like I was floating above the earth when I dressed. Now, this seems to have pushed me into the stratosphere!

    It is indeed like another step up in our world. Be careful, the pink fog can be thicker but it is easier to find your way out. As so many have posted, it is the balance that is important.
    Yes, there has definitely been a density change in the Pink Fog. Financially, I know that I must be careful and shop sales and bargains....but I think if I'm patient, my wardrobe will grow.

    Something new to wear is still exciting. I hope that never goes away don't you?
    Kitty
    I think it will always be, now that I have had this open up for me. I have definite ideas about the types of clothes I want to wear, and just looking at some of the stuff online is thrilling.

    Quote Originally Posted by lady di View Post
    one of the best things about dressing is the totally relaxed feeling and not so much the sex
    There is that, definitely. Just lounging around dressed is going to be a wonderful new experience for me. And relaxing is something that I certainly need to do more of.

  16. #16
    There's that smile! CarlaWestin's Avatar
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    I'm curious, do you have a male side that you are equally as comfortable with? I'm to the point now that I know my male side is finely tuned to provide a life of comfort and security for my household and my female side is a fantastic comfort zone. You've sparked that french maid's outfit thing with me again and now I'll probably finally get one. My wife will think I'm weird dressed all weekend and purposely choosing to wear heels and clean the whole house but she's becoming more tolerant. If I didn't have to work, I'd be 24/7 en fem. Really! It just feels right.
    Last edited by CarlaWestin; 10-21-2011 at 11:14 PM. Reason: sp
    I've waited so long for this time. Makeup is so frustrating. Shaking hands and I look so old. This was a mistake.
    My new maid's outfit is cute. Sure fits tight.
    And then I step into the bedroom and in the mirror, I see a beautiful woman looking back at me.
    Smile, Honey! You look fabulous!

  17. #17
    Momarie GG Momarie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Piora View Post
    As some of you might be aware, I have crossdressed in the past strictly for sexual purposes. Afterward, I would no longer desire to remain in my female clothing.

    Recently, that has changed, and I'm a bit surprised. While I still get a sensual pleasure from dressing, I have a much diminished desire to do anything more than to enjoy being dressed.

    It seemed to start when I received my French Maid Uniform in the mail a week or two ago. After I finished putting it on, I loved being in it, and I wore it for the whole afternoon without....well....you know. And I've been doing that ever since. I never had a desire to get 'outerwear' - dresses, shoes, skirts, blouses etc. And I do now. I seem to have passed into a new stage, after dressing for 34 years. I feel that I now want to spend time just being enfemme....to feel pretty and feminine.

    It seems that those members on the site who predicted this happening were right. It's a new era, that I am looking forward to greatly!
    Sorry if I sound dumb...but do you mean masturbating?
    [SIZE="4"]Momarie[/SIZE]

  18. #18
    Member Imeni's Avatar
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    Is it possible to still be a horndog most of the time yet still feel so comforted by what your wearing that you don't have to act on those feelings and just relax? I'm just a youngling, 25, so even playing on my xbox im just relaxing on my couch in one of my dresses and nylons is much more fun that doing it in guy mode!

  19. #19
    eluuzion eluuzion's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by docrobbysherry View Post
    I've been WAITING for this same evolution, Piora! After being stuck in the dressing, "horndog" stage for 14 years. If I'm like u, I'll have to wait 20 more years to move on!

    Let's see. That will make me 80+ y/o! Definitely time to stop being a "horndog". I just CAN'T WAIT!
    I'm with you Doc! I guess I have over 25 years on my CD mileage log sheet now. I've heard that "just a matter of time before you lose the sexual interest side of dressing" story about a hundred times over the years.

    Still waiting...

    But I am not making any rash judgments as to the credibility of the claims. To be fair, I am going to give it another 20-30 years before reaching any conclusions...

    I think that is fair...don't you?

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

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    Quote Originally Posted by lady di View Post
    one of the best things about dressing is the totaly relaxed feeling and not so much the sex
    I like the relaxed feeling also for I said before I like wearing my bra and panties and jeans daily just like the clothes

  21. #21
    Member LaurenB's Avatar
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    Piora, I can vouch for your experience. With me it was a gradual thing. Instead of stripping off the clothes after getting off (yes Momarie, that's what that means), I began to leave them on. After a while, I could dress and enjoy it without having sex. It was and is certainly exciting, sensual and sexual; but that aspect can be a "background" thing now. I can turn it on or off as I want. I find so much enjoyment just in being able to express my female self. I think it comes from finally being able to control your testosterone. Age probably helps in this respect.
    LB

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Imeni View Post
    Is it possible to still be a horndog most of the time yet still feel so comforted by what your wearing that you don't have to act on those feelings and just relax? I'm just a youngling, 25, so even playing on my xbox im just relaxing on my couch in one of my dresses and nylons is much more fun that doing it in guy mode!

    Indeed, that is exactly what happens to most of us. I recall the adolescent days( pre teens) when the sexual act was the important part of being gender enhanced and just thought it to be normal in a sense. That has long passed and today I just love the feeling I get inside my mind and body being Jill whenever I please without the sexual gratification.

  23. #23
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    Piora. remember and remind yourself to keep a balance in your life. If the pink fog is too thick, take a short break from dressing to get back out.

    Kitty

  24. #24
    I accept myself as is Gillian Gigs's Avatar
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    One of the best things that happened was when I got beyond the sex and dressing thing. You can finally enjoy the experience without sex getting in the way. Funny thing of it is that my SO gets the part about the dressing and the sex, but not the part about the sheer enjoyment of the clothes.
    I like myself, regardless of the packaging that I may come in! It's what is on the inside of the package that counts!

  25. #25
    Breakin' social taboos TGMarla's Avatar
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    Piora, that very same thing happened to me as well. Most of the time when I'm dressed now, I just immerse myself in the joy of being feminine and "being" a woman for a while. Kudos to you. It's a great place to be.

    Any money found in the laundry is MINE!


    "This is no social crisis....this is me having fun!"

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