Anger Management

[Stephenie S]

I'll post as soon as I can. I'm still trying to recover from Karen whacking me with her hockey stick.

S

[suzy1]

Not all of the members are as educated as you Casandra but they are all welcome here.
I don’t care if they can’t spell, there comments are just as important to me.

SUZY

[Kittyagain]

LOL I found it really helps to limit my angry replies to no more than two words like bite me or . . . well, you get the idea.

Kitty

[Jillian Faith]

I don't get angry... I get even! Lol.

I don't get angry... I get ahead!

[Eryn]

I will write a post burning with logical venom, edit it until it perfectly represents my thoughts, and then delete it, as the stupid idjet doesn't deserve the benefit of my wisdom.

I'm glad that someone else does that! The writing itself gives some catharsis and then I come to realize that sometimes the fire doesn't really need any more gasoline from me.

OK enough of this crap! We are up to post 29 and it is still on topic plus no-one has been purposely irrational and rude and started trying to define the exact meaning of transgender. What is wrong with you people!

And WTF are you looking at!!

I'm looking at you, you orderly assemblage of electrons striking phosphorous! Transgender is a kind of goose that flies between continents. And so's your Dad! I think bicycling is the best exercise.

Happy now?

Eryn, always aiming to please.

[midnightMelissa]

You know, I often feel that way not just here but out there in the real world too. I look at it this way. Living life takes "advanced citizenship". It's rough. Let's see you acknowledge a man whose words make your blood boil, who's standing center stage and advocating at the top of his lungs that which you would spend a lifetime opposing at the top of yours. If you can do that and the best you can do is to write lines, I think you win!

M

[Eryn]

Niels Bohr, the physicist, often had heated discussions with his colleagues. When he disagreed with their idiotic ideas he would express it in the strongest possible terms:

"We agree much more than you think."

[Kaz]

Thanks for all the responses...I've really enjoyed reading them and it looks we all may have! Well a bit at least!

To Suzy... no not aimed at you at all! It was aimed at me... every now and then something just sends me crazy and I just can't stop myself! The next morning and wonder if I have dreamt it... sound familiar?

Scarlet Rose is right on the button as it a response I made on one of her threads that triggered my thoughts... and yes the number of times I spent ages on a post only to delete it after giving up, finally wondering why I am writing it!

Anyway... today I am not angry... I am calm and collected and was planning to go to bed and have an early night... then I just thought... ought to check in to the site to check responses... well suprised! But now I may be here longer than I intended!

[Angie G]

If I feel I must abuse a poster. I just click off the post and move on.I think it has only been once or so that I lost it.
Angie

[Missy]

I set back and think about the post that bring up the anger levels then relax and smile and LMAO at the stupid things some people are talking about the narrow minded
or just ignorant things that get posted inline.

[suit]

I know people that use "their really good looking " as a put down .

[Tracii G]

Ummmm Ahhhhhh IDK what were we talking about?

[lisa_cd]

Right now, I don't think I can post an angry reply...I am too new here..and just try to smile...

[*Vanessa*]

.
well - quite frankly I'm a little intimidated to reply to this post Kaz

I need to pick up your mantra as I normally dive in mouth first and then regret my actions.

[Sarah Doepner]

When I find that someone has written a post that offends me I look in the mirror and decide that I really don't have anything to be so very proud of and need to defend in the imaginary world of the internet.

[*Vanessa*]

.
Actually in true fashion I have nothing to say. I just want to see if I get a prize for 500 posts in about 60 days..

Love ya all

[DebbieL]

Anything else work for you? How do you cope with feeling angry about posts and dealing with the 'do I respond or not' emotion and the equally important... 'hit the 'new posts' thread, in the hope that there is something more cheery on offer?'?

Anger is a masculine emotion. Women get bursts of anger, but they are associated with shame and guilt for getting angry. :-D

When I post, or I see an upset reaction, I realize that we are all discussing a subject that is very near and dear to our hearts, and we are each at different phases of acceptance and changes. I also understand that there are a wide range of destinations as well, and for each member of this group, there are moments when we want changes so desparately, and yet fear that same change. We want the freedom to step out, and yet we are also legitimately concerned about consequences.

We have all been through our own versions of pain, isolation, loneliness, feeling like we are the only ones who have ever been through it.

There are also those who have made the remarkable sacrifices and deserve the respect for their courage in making the choices and taking the actions required to complete their transitions.

My answers are rarely short, because I realize that without a context, a comment could seem callous our trite. It helps those who have not been as far down the path as I have, or as others I have known, to understand the thinking behind my comments. I also read the other comments in a thread before posting my own, so I can address multiple issues that have come up in the thread.

[Frédérique]

Anything else work for you? How do you cope with feeling angry about posts and dealing with the 'do I respond or not' emotion and the equally important... 'hit the 'new posts' thread, in the hope that there is something more cheery on offer?

[SIZE="2"]I don’t post more often than I DO, but I actually eschew the cheery stuff and look for serious topics worthy of a response. You know, I never hit the “new posts” button, preferring to browse manually – I find a lot of interesting fodder for response this way…

As for “do I respond or not(?),” I often read something that hits me the wrong way (evidence of a successful troller), and I will then log off and think about what to say in response. More often than not I will walk around, take a series of deep breaths, and extinguish the desire to vent my anger at a supposed slight, either real or imagined. This usually works, but now and then I will write down my feelings and push the “submit” button. Sometimes it’s worth it to say something others are not saying, if only to hear it, or, in this case, READ it…

I’d rather come across a certain way and not come across another way, so I try to control myself. That being said, my rare outbursts, based as they are on observations of chronic misbehavior, have cost me the support of a few individuals on this site. This technique of self-suppression works for me, but I must say that leaving the site, and then staying away for a week or so, also works wonders for anger management…
[/SIZE]

[PretzelGirl]

I copy their picture and draw a mustache and beard on it (well for femme presenting ones anyway)!

It depends on the person. We all have not worded things well on the internet. Words don't always portray the true meaning of what the person is wanting to say.

So if it is someone that is normally not antagonistic, I will try and give a good reply without venom. The discussion can be a good thing and for someone that doesn't normally post that way, you usually have a good topic.

But if the person is consistently posting vile messages (and there are a few that I can think of), I just move on. Historically those people tend to dig their own graves and the mods will smite them down when appropriate. The arguing with them gets nowhere.

[*Vanessa*]

... but I must say that leaving the site, and then staying away for a week or so, also works wonders for anger management…

wow - that's some kind of anger !

Normally I don't read your stuff Freddy, but recently I have taken the stand to try better understand you through your writing. To do this it is copy/paste into word, then change the font and size then read read read.

So you can see I don't read a lot of you. You're a great writer, it just take you a long time to get to the train for my thinking. Not trying to pick on anyone here nor am I venting any anger. I just had an Andy Rooney image running around my head and wanted to share it with this thought.

Yours Truly
Venessa

[Presh GG]

Sounds like a wonderful world to me Kaz.

Presh GG