Anyone else happy in the closet?

[drag n fly]

Thanks for this conversation, Amy..I find myself in a sort of middle ground on this..My wife knows my CD proclivity, and I do not push it on her..When I'm in slippers and night gown at night and in the mornings, she sees me..and does not approve..Accept, maybe, but approve..no. I wear women's clothing when I go out..But it is ambiguous, like the jeans I'm wearing right now from Woman Within, in size 1X...large, baggy and slightly fem....My shoes too...even my socks...and always panties...I'm sure many of my acquaintances have questions about my gender..but I am vague enough that those questions do not come to the fore...I seem to be drifting into a very, very gradual outing of myself....Interesting...I'll just have to wait and watch...smooches Jackie

[Chubby cd]

Not happy, just comfortable.

[sometimes_miss]

All I can say is, I've lived with being the outcast when I was a kid and it wasn't pleasant. And I see how much of society treats what they think of as 'freaks' like us behind our backs, and don't envy being treated like that either. So in the closet I'll stay.

[PetiteTonya]

I have never known the closet. My own particular experience was rather different than most. Having said that, being "out" isn't for everyone and as much as I am aware that there are some here who are wedded to the notion that being in public is a logical, natural part of the progression, my experience would tend,in some cases to suggest otherwise. Everyone is different and after all, your own needs, urges and reasons for expressing yourself and how you celebrate that expression are really a very personal decision.

[AllieSF]

Suzy1, the probable reason on this side of the pond this thread is going so well, and I am happy for that, is that all the overly opinionated posters who like to attack the closeted ones are on vacation for Thanksgiving. They might be back to night and then we will see what hits the fan.

I never was in the stay at home closet, but that is me and my personality and stage of life. I respect everyone that is in their own closet and hope that when they are ready, that they have successful outings. Otherwise, isn't it great to be us, wherever we are?

[fun4metoo2004]

Yes, I am very happy in the closet. I have no plans to come out. My Sister would understand, however I feel strongly that my Son would not.

[CassieV]

I thought I was until recently. My wife's known forever, but it's taken me awhile to figure out that this is not something that only belongs in the bedroom. It's a part of me, 100%, and I don't feel like denying it or really even hiding it anymore. I'm working on slowly adapting my public appearance to better reflect how I feel inside. But obviously I'll never think badly of those that keep things private.

[GBJoker]

I wouldn't say that I'm happy in the closet right now; more that I feel content. I think... (Old dictionary to the rescue!) Yes, content.

I would love to able though, to wake up one morning and just say, "Eh... Today I'm going to dress this way." And then go about my day as normal.

[erintemp]

I would say I'm mostly in the closet (to all famly, most friends). I have gone out a hand full of times redbox and atms, but the last two times, I've gone into stores where people were around.

[Barbara Ella]

Being new to my realization of who I am, I am in the closet, and will likely remain there. Although I must say that this thread has made me realize just how large the closet can be. Initially I thought it was limited to occasionally donning bits of femme attire to let myself out and/or underdressing, and until I get the SO on board, it might be that limiting. But I am seeing some beautiful women here with their makeup and outfits and shoes, all put together, but still in private. I will most likely stay private regardless of how far myself takes me, but who really knows.

I initially thought that at 6 ft my height and my age, 65, would hinder my femme presentation. Now I dont worry about it because I am seeing myself now for the first time, and I like what I see, and know that with the help of the girls here I will be able to get the most out of what I have and want to do.

At 6 ft I thought my height would be a challenge, but now after reading the posts here, I feel vertically challenged. Still that male insecurity thing popping up I guess...LOL

Babes

[msginaadoll]

Im in the closet and relatively happy. I am able to get out at times, and that is enuff for me. Some people can be judgemental but the thing I believe is my situation is not the same as your situation. We are all different.

[Vanessa Storrs]

My closet got so full of clothes there was no room for me so I was forced to venture out. I love closing the closet doorbbehind me as I go out to inflict my beauty upon the world. I am comfortable going out and enjoy pushing my boundaries. I have sympathy and empathy for our closeted sisters. I hope that we all are comfortable and happy with the amount we are in or out of the closet.

[joaniek]

In the closet, too. Not passable and not interested in trying - Not to say that if there was a clothing selection that is a bit more androgynous, I wouldn't be pleased. For now, I do the underdress thing w/ dancewear when I'm working out or cycling/running. All the best to the other closeted folks.

[Melody1985]

On a 1-10 scale where 10 is very happy to be IN the closet, I would say I am a 4. I want to maintain my closeted lifestyle in regards to most of my family and friends. But I sometimes want to go out in public at the same time. Now, being extremely tall, I am not that passable. But it would be nice, and may do it just for the heck of it. Good luck to all those who are trying to muster up the nerve to let it out, and much love to all those who are content with staying inside!

Peace & Love
.....Melody.....

[alinne_lima]

Actually I'm not completely happy in the closet, I like to dress in private beacause it´s safe, no one will recognize me, but I would love to feel the sensation of going out to a bar, to a club em feme, or go to the beach in bikini and get a nice tan!!

[kristinacd55]

Amy, I was exactly like you are and circumstances and my own wanting to come out changed things this year. I am thrilled for the change and wouldn't go back for anything.
However, that being said I believe that I could've stayed in the closet the rest of my life although knowing what I know now I wouldn't LOL

[retrofitme]

I'm 'in the closet' and perfectly happy there - though I would consider going out under very specific circumstances - say if my wife and I were on vacation in a CD friendly place and there's no one from my current life there (except my wife of course)... then I would consider going out en femme.

[charlytuna]

I made it out as far dressing in front of my wife and going out underdress I happy the way are for me now maybe someday I will venture out the door but for now I staying put behind closed doors

[Iris]

I'm happy in the closet for the moment and what the future will bring is still a question. My family would not understand it, nor my wife.

[GeminaRenee]

I can very much empathize with your desire to remain closeted. I once peeked my head out for a while, and was having fun. I only went out fully dressed once, but it wasn't uncommon for me to go to the bar on a random Wednesday night wearing flare-legged jeans with a guy shirt I liked, or throw on some cute accessories or lip gloss. Living hundreds of miles from most of my family made it easy to live the illusion of being totally carefree. But the thing that stopped it for me was when a friend of my ex approached her and asked her if she knew that I was a homosexual. Outwardly, it was laughable - since she and I were sharing panties & makeup & acting out after-prom scenarios in her old dresses - but I felt violated in a way. It made me much more reluctant to share too much about myself with others. Of course, it didn't help that we were living in a small town, either.

We've since split, and I've moved back to the city, where I remain closeted. I kind of have to, since I'm no longer passable without her. But I do think about the day when I will be, and will want to venture out again. I know that I'll want to. I'd love to ask a GG out at some point while en femme. But I want to be careful. I'm not really interested in having family or close friends find out. Sooo, in the closet I stay for the time. (:

Have fun dressing on your own time, girl!

[Dawn cd]

According to the way the question is posed, it's either closet or "out." I suggest there's also a third way of androgyny. I wear women's clothes, jewelry, scent and makeup in public without presenting myself as a woman. I guess the purists would say that I'm closeted, but the term doesn't adequately describe my look and practice. And, yes, I'm happy presenting as I do.

[alluts]

I am not out except for to my SO and I am perfectly fine with that. I guess I have two personalitys, male and gendernaught, or something... I like who I am and like playing another role sometimes, nothing wrong with that is there?

[danielletorresani]

I definitely prefer being in the closet. Besides not ever wanting my loved ones to know, I kinda like the fact that it's my dirty little secret...

[Tara D. Rose]

I used to love my closet. Although I am mostly still in the closet, the walls of my closet are not as solid as they once were. What worked for me in the past no longer works for me now. But I have nothing but respect for one's decision to remain in the closet, if that is what the individual chooses to do. I do not believe that each and every crossdresser has a desire to leave the closet. I further believe some simply have no desire or need to do so. It is as simple as that! Enjoy the blessed gift of crossdressing that has been bestowed upon you in the manner you deem fit . . . .

Right on Anne, right on. Let me say it one more time....right (freakin') on. It's about live and let live. What works for some may not work for others. None of us should ever critisize what works with us or me, and say to others, well hey, look at me, look what I'm doing, get out here like I'm doing. We should all on here respect eachother for what any other individual is comfortable with. If some want to stay in the closet, I applaude them, if some want to walk the mall, I applaude them, if some want to go out in groups, or sit on their front porch and wave to the neighbors, I applaude them. The phrase "live and let live" was coined in the 60's
It is so awsome in it's simplicity, live and let live, should be practiced by everyone. Always respect others. I've lived a long time, and remember so many things of the elders I knew told me when I was a child. That life is short, and the older you get, the faster time and life goes by. I have for so long now to have found that these words of wisdom to be oh so true. I do get puzzled and confused that we crossdressers cannot find a common ground, a ground without confusions. While hundreds of post's come and go, I personally would think, that by now, ,,we now understand eachother. I'm saying to all, we can find that common ground, if we just apply,,administer and ,,or,,,,practice,,, ,,Love and RESPECT. I do write in parables, I am oftentimes misunderstood here, as is with so many others,, for not only my typed words are so often misunderstood, I am not alone in that department. So, many of us are mis-understood. But how can any of us ever go wrong as long as we practice...on this site......Love & Respect?? What's good for the goose may not actually and or ,,,,,always good for the gander. Underdressing may be good and comfortable for some,,,,, but will not or may not or probably not do for another. A closet,, or the closet may be the best place for some, but a lonesome place for another. A TS, may, and,,, or will,,,, or have found her place of sanctity, after such a journey with many prices to pay,,,,,, and not just with funds and currency, but the loss of friends and family.
I oftentimes find myself to become more lonesome the more I read threads and post's here. I guess I need to close out here.
Always......love & Respect.....................................Tara

[Erica Marie]

Ive been in my closet for over 25 years. About a year ago I came out to my gf, who has been very supportive. She has offered me chances to dress, she has even offered me cloths. She accepts me for who I am, but is not ready to help me and be with me dressed yet. The real problem is getting out and being open about who I really am. Living in a small town poses many problems. I have been searching for a cd friend locally to share my lifestyle with but to no avail having a hard time. So till I can find that ever so needed friend, one that can help me perfect my look, I guess my closet is where I am stuck. UGH