I finally decided to take the plunge and go in public. I have been practicing my walk, talk, and appearance, and wanted to put it to the test.
The plan was pretty simple: go to Walmart, get a frozen pizza and a few other items, then leave using the self checkout lane. Minimal time in the store, and minimal personal interaction.
Walmart had different plans.
After spotting the pizza I wanted, I opened the glass door, and an avalanche of pizzas came flying out! I involuntarily made a muted screaming noise, and a nearby male shopper came over quickly and joked "guess you get five for one!"
I composed myself, smiled, replaced the pizzas and kept going.
At this point I noticed that nobody really was paying much attention to me. Good. I was blending in! A glance from a guy here or there, but that's pretty normal for a female shopper. It was like I was invisible to the ladies, they never even looked at me.
Checkout time... and BIG lines. All of the self checkouts were out of order. A voice in my head started yelling "This wasn't part of the plan! Leave the cart! Just walk out before something bad happens!"
I stuck with it, and got in line. While waiting I kept calm, composed. A little kid in front of me kept looking back and staring at me. I looked at her and smiled, and she hid behind her mother. An older lady behind me bumped my butt with her cart a few times. I glanced back and she said "Oh! I'm sorry!!" I smiled and said "It's OK!" as femme as I could, but it came out as a squeak.
I finally got to the cashier. I had a pizza, a gallon of milk, and a ladies top which i snagged near the checkout line. She was completely indifferent to everything, and even put my groceries in the cart, which has never, ever happened to me as a guy at Walmart.
I paid and left, and even managed to squeak a "thank you" to the cashier as I walked away.
It was a big step for me, and a huge learning experience. My heart was pounding during checkout. So many people standing around bored, looking at everyone else. Was I spotted? Were guys checking me out? I hadn't planned on talking to anyone, but in a venue like a crowded grocery store, it can hardly be avoided. It was intense... and fun. I can't wait until I'm confident and convincing enough to chat up the cashier or random strangers at the store.
Now I'm home and relieved and just exhilarated by the whole experience. I took a couple phone pics right after I got home to show you all. Thanks for listening!
Originally Posted by Carla Stevens
man, i feel like a woman 
