Double take! Man or woman?

[Stephenie S]

Thank you Sue,

Truer words were never spoken. Smile.

If you are 17 years old and look like a fashion model, you can get away with the sultry unhappy look. On anyone older than 30, that sultry unsmiling look just looks like you are miserable.

Listen guys. Women smile. We smile at men (sometimes), we smile at children (always), we smile at other women (all the time), and sometimes we just smile to ourselves 'cause it's just so darn much fun being a woman.

Smile. A smile goes a LONG way. A smile signals that you are relaxed and happy with who you are and what you are doing. Are there women who don't smile? Sure. And some of you may even be in a relation with one. But those women are unhappy women. Try not to use them (or the aforementioned fashion models) as examples. Instead look at Karen Hutton's pictures. There's a woman (or guy) who knows how to smile.

[RenneB]

Wow what a great thread for those of us on the outside of the closet.. I like the point about needing a thick skin to be out. Yep, my skin get thicker each time out. I have preped myself with an excuse if confronted as "Look folks, I'm working undercover for a private detective in another store and need to pick some stuff up so don't give me a problem" or "I'm on my way to a play as a character and had to dress ahead of time, so if that's a problem I don't need to know". I haven't had to use either of those, but just having them in my head gives me the confidence to be out and about.

A few posters mentioned the kids. Oh yea, they can see right through you. They don't say anything, just long stares like their brain is trying to reconsile the apparent conflict in visual clues on genetics. Teen age girls, oh yea been there done that... "OMG you're right....it's one of them" was the line that got me out of the store with my tail between my legs... Next day went back and never had an issue.

Most people have no interest in looking at other people especially during the shopping season.... until, you have on an outfit that they haven't seen before and you look good, then they are checking your combination out and seeing if it would look good on them...

Renne.....

[KimberlyJane]

I have been living as a woman for several years now, and at the beginning I did have a few teen girls do the point and laugh, but once I learned my style, and felt comfortable as myself, I have never had a negative reaction since! It IS all about your own self-confidence, when you are happy with yourself, your head is higher, your posture is better, and the smile is always there! This body language stops the negative stuff in it's tracks for me! I have been to the mall numerous times and had many teens give me a look over, and my smile and confidence often makes them actually compliment my outfit or look! It's all about your body language. (and I am 6'1" 250#)

If you are not yet confident, it is obvious to most every human that takes an interest, especially the self-conscious teens! They have SO many body and personality issues of their own, and it is just a natural reaction to demean others to cover their own insecurities. Let it roll off your back, and use it as a reminder to hold your head high, and keep a big smile on that pretty face of yours!

Only my confidence has really changed, and because of that I am always mistaken for a GG now! If you don't have it yet, fake it!! Just faking it can be enough to change your posture and mental attitude! I agree with the other posts, the smile is the biggest factor, smile and the world smiles with you!

I am sure the guy that was staring was a CD or fan of us T-gurls.. Straight guys are too phobic to make more than a passing glance. Just keep on keeping on. You can't control what others think, only your reaction to same..

Best Wishes Gurls!!
Kimberly

[angpai30]

My avatar shows what I was wearing that day! My eye makeup could probably use some help. I smiled most of the day. The only time I didn't smile was when I sat down because I was wearing heels and my feet hurt. I had been walking around In them since 3 a.m..

[joanna marie]

I think something else is going on here. A regular ol' guy out with his family wouldn't do a double take or spy behind a sign. It sounds to me that he could be a cd wannabe or a secret cd admirer. That's my first reaction to reading the OP.

That was my first thought also

[Joann Smith]

In this big one horse hick a.. country town any one that is seen wearing make up and heels often are assumed to be CDs or DQ because the majority of the middle age women round here do not wear make up or wear it poorly

Joann

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

I usually attract at least a stare or a look that says I'm being noticed because most of the time I go out in women's clothing I still present as male. I actually did go out in full femme about a month ago, and I walked around the mall, but I know I didn't pass because I still got a lot of looks, and they actually seemed a little more hostile and judgmental than the looks I get when I go out with my "guy in a-" outfits. But I do think that everyone on here who has made the comment of smile, and act comfortable and relaxed is dead on.

Like it or not, we are unusual, we deviate from the norm. As much as we understand our own issues, I'd venture to guess that all of us have also noticed something that was outside of our typical frame of reference in public and needed a second to process it. Sometimes we too stare, or at least "notice." But the more you present it as something that isn't a big deal, and smile, and give an attitude of "Yep, I am." The more others will pick up on that energy and roll with it too.

Also, one thing to keep in mind when you're out is that just because someone does call you miss or ma'am or use feminine pronouns to describe you does not mean that you are actually passing and fooling them into thinking you're female. I have gone to the mall en femme before with a GG female friend and we were referred to as "ladies" and "girls" a lot by people, but I know without a doubt that I did not pass. I've done the same thing when I have been working at various retail stores and restaurants when TG folks come in, I totally read them, but I think it's polite and professional to refer to them by the gender they present.