I lost that loving feeling toward crossdressing
(caution: i kinda spill my guts here)
Maybe it's just my hormones, but lately I'm feeling very down and apathetic about dressing up. It used to rock my world when I slid on a pair of nylons or sooth me just to feel the brush of a wig on my shoulders, but it's not doing anything for me now. In fact, I've even thought about how strange of a hobby it is. I really really hate that I thought that. The last couple days that I cleared my schedule to specifically dress didn't go very well left me empty.
In the past, there are times when I feel very strongly about my dressing. Sometimes I've even fantasised about SRS and just becoming a full time girl (of course societal pressures would probably scare me away). But I haven't felt this way in a few months. Even when I 100% repressed my dressing, I never felt as awful inside as I do now.
Has anyone else felt like this? Is it my hormones going up and down? Am I maybe not the CDer I thought I was since I was a little kid? I'm just confused
Maybe I'm just placing too high of a priority on CDing to fix other things that are wrong with my life, but I just feel weird and not good.