Why be a woman?

[Raychel]

For me it is not all about becoming a woman, It is more about dressing in the clothes that I feel most comfortable. It is an escape from my everyday stresses of life, Just relax and be who I am.

I would never want to be a woman. They are goddesses in my eyes. WIth all that it takes to be a true woman, and tolerate a crossdressing husband. I could never do all that.

[Jessica Louis]

For me, women have such beauty and grace. The way they move and talk. How they can show their affection toward one-another. Please don't get me wrong, their are some caring and wonderful men out there and also some very not so nice women. I prefer to be one of the caring women because I just love their inner and outer beauty. Who wouldn't want to copy such a person. I just feel better mentally when I'm dressed.

Jessica

[Karren H]

when you do let the rest of us know

I'm not holding my breath! And who said I ever want to "be" one.... I just want to look like one!

[Kaitlyn Michele]

[QUOTE=5150 Girl;2750693]I'll second that! Men suck![/QUOTE

All men? or just men that arent crossdressers?

[Silentpartner GG SO]

I prefer female values - loving, nurturing, taking care, as opposed to male values - dominating, destroying, generally being an idiot; no contest really.

Surely nobody needs clothes to have these values - why cant a man have these without the womens clothes?

I am a genetic woman but most of the time wear jeans and sloppy T-shirt, or fleece type shirt for practicality. It doesnt change my inner being, or my values or my behaviour just because I'm not wearing high heels & a skirt

and dont take this the wrong way because its not meant to offend but if imitation is the sincerest form of flattery then the way some guys look when dressed en femme is really not flattering to women at all!

[STACY B]

Did it all to the fullest you name it go ahead an try,, ALL of it an that was the easy part being a MAN !!!! Now try to be a WOMAN now thats the hardest thing that I have ever tried to do !!!! : ITS THE ULTIMATE CHALANGE !!!!!!!! BRING IT ONNNNNNN

[Suzy Parker]

I don't Want to be a woman I just want to dress like a woman Becasue the clothes are

[BRANDYJ]

Hi Katie


As a man and if you sexually desire women is this desire not about movement toward the opposite sex? The desire for two to become one ? To possess and be possessed by a woman ?

I have noticed there is an element of worship for women by men when I read many of the threads here, under these circumstances it seems natural to turn ones body into an altar as a symbolic statement of what is adored. For many I think they are paying homage to the female sex when they dress, a way of honoring by emulating. This combined with sexual desire makes for a potent cocktail because than ones own body becomes a eroticized altar.

I wonder sometimes if the same forces that shape our sexuality also shape our reasons or need to crossdress. Beauty inflames the males sexual desire but for others the desire to be beautiful as a woman is because they feel ugly as a man even if as a man they are thought to be beautiful
(handsome), the body becomes a prison that prevents the expression of ones essence.

For me I do not think of women as a group being morally superior or inferior to men as a group because I would than fear the danger of adding to the misandry and misogyny so prevalent in the world.

Kelly touched on something that I have felt for a long time. I know from a very early age that I admired women, starting with my mother. Next was a particular aunt, followed by a neighboring teenage girl and a cousin. Then my first crush on my verkindergartenkindergarden teacher.
Before I even knew a thing about sex, I was fascinated with the different way they looked, dressed and acted. I can remember their soft touinnocents an innocentd kiss or hug. I was very aware of their clothes and a glimpse of nylon and lace, the smooth skin and even their smell from perfume. Add that to their curves and shape so different from men. I think I so adored and admired them, that I wanted to emulate what I so worshiped about them. That early attraction to all things feminine, I'm sure was what started me on the road to crossdressing at age 10 or so. Like many of us, it started out very erotic and sexual. That started with my first ever orgasm when my mother's white nylon slip was left hanging on a hook in the bathroom. Later, when I'd try on anything that made me look and even feel feminine, I was pretending to be what I so worshiped and admired not even knowing. Unbeknown to me, this was the budding of my sexual attraction to the opposite sex. But much later it changed to the whole feeling of looking and feeling like what I so worshiped.
Maybe much like any child's play in a world of pretend I pretended to I was a cowboy. My early heros, the Lone Ranger, Daniel Boone, Roy Rogers, and Davey Crockett. Women in my life were also my heros, so I pretended to be one of them. The only difference is, I never stopped emulatg what I so adore and am attracted to....WOMEN.

In a book called "The Goddess Path", they touched on a few things that made sense. The authors suggested that male crossdressers where emulating the Great Mother Goddess and were on a path to be more in touch with her. They went on to say that many men wore long robes in a way to worship and emulate her. This long before any worshiped a male figure as a god. The earliest form of worshiping was worshipping Goddesses. They even suggested that was the beginning of the typical long robes priests and clergy still wear today. So even before Christ was born, men have been emulating women by dressing like what they worshiped.
It still feels good to dress and act like a woman. Why this form of pretend did not go by the wayside like my earliest pretending to be a cowboy is simply because I still worship all attractive women. It's a part of me andwho I am.

[Gillian Gigs]

Crossdressing is like having your cake and being able to eat it too. So, why not get the best of both worlds, I know lots of women already doing it and they love it. It is not that "men suck", it is just that they get macho and it spills out all over the place. Sort of like "pissing" contests, someone usually gets wet,and it is some poor bystander!

[KrystalA]

Asking why I crossdress is like asking why people exist at all. I do it because it feels wonderful, it feels normal, it's who I am.

[daarleane]

Crosssdressing allows me to be soft. It somehow gets past all the "manly" things I have been conditioned to do.

[Beth Mays]

I am really starting care less about the why's and a lot more about the how's .

[Sara Jessica]

I really don't understand why we like to become women. I can understand that our love of women's clothes may motivate us to wear them, but I don't understand the motive behind becoming a woman. I'm a man, I identify as such, I have no desire to live as a girl in the slightest, and yet I want to put on makeup and a wig and become Katie. Why would we want to become women? I don't understand my desire to crossdress at all. It's something about me I really want to figure out

Since you profess to have no understanding as to your own behavior (your desire to crossdress), you really shouldn't question in any way, shape or form as to why some of us wish to become women.

It'd be the same as me starting a thread with the comment "I cannot understand why a man would want to crossdress".

Many of us are in different places with this whole thing. We may not understand one another's motivations but at at the end of the day, a little empathy goes a long way.

[Sarah L]

For me, it's all about the clothes and nothing more. I would wear a skirt or dress all the time if I could.
I don't bother to wear makeup or try to look like a woman unless I am going out. I only do it then to blend in. Most people don't care what you are wearing, but I don't want to be noticed by somebody who might want to cause trouble.
Crossdressing does relieve stress for me, but I think the stress is caused by wanting to wear what society considers unappropriate for my gender. It's kind of a catch 22.
Having said that, I do find the male body to be just awful to look at, no matter what shape the person is in. On the other hand, I think the female body is a work of art. Just a wonder to behold. I love women and am attracted to them too much to ever want to be one.

[Sarah Doepner]

I'm not holding my breath! And who said I ever want to "be" one.... I just want to look like one!

Crossdressing is like having your cake and being able to eat it too. So, why not get the best of both worlds, I know lots of women already doing it and they love it. It is not that "men suck", it is just that they get macho and it spills out all over the place. Sort of like "pissing" contests, someone usually gets wet,and it is some poor bystander!

For me it's these things, thanks Karren and Gillian, and as Raychel says "It is an escape from my everyday stresses of life, Just relax and be who I am."

And I have to admit that it's an opportunity to be a little selfish and put everyone else on hold for a while. Since I'm not out to the world, when I crossdress, it's time to pay attention to me and use the time to relax and heal a little. A time to explore and face an interesting challenge of converting my image to something very different from what I present on a daily basis.

[Brenda Freeman]

I am a man and I like me! I also love to dress as a woman, I like how I look and how it feels. I also love how women look and dress, I guess I am drawn to that and always have been. I have never cared that much about dressing up and shopping for the latest in new mens attire,but love looking at womens clothes and the latest trends. Thats me! Thats why, and it took a long time to deal with it, but I did and am Glad I did! Is there more to it, not in my case.

[JiveTurkeyOnRye]

Being a woman isn't about wearing panties, nylons and heels...

Hear hear! I do all that as a man.

You have to figure out why you do it for yourself. It may be something simple, it may because you have this whole different identity that you've been hiding from your entire life. Whatever it is, you have to learn to be honest with yourself and accept who you really are.

I think I'm a blend of some of the examples of reasons you gave, but I will say for me I got a heck of a lot happier with it when I stopped questioning my motivations all the time and just embraced that I like certain things and while I may not ever truly understand where the motivation comes from, I'm better off just being accepting of myself and the things I like to do. Sometimes that means being a boy in boys clothes, or a boy in girls clothes, or a girl. and I'm fine with all of those options, or more if they come along.

[Badtranny]

Surely nobody needs clothes to have these values - why cant a man have these without the womens clothes? !

Just another mystery in the CD enigma.

I often wonder if there would ever be any honest answers to these questions. The repression and self loathing is almost necessary to be a crossdresser apparently. As a bonafide TG person I can say without a doubt that I never worshiped women or looked up to them in any way simply because they were women. I have never put a particular value on their clothes or mannerisms. I can also attest that what I'm wearing has very little to do with how I'm feeling on a day to day basis.

I think any CD would be doing themselves a favor by really examining how they feel when "dressed" and trying to get in touch with those same feelings when they're in "man mode". I am always amazed and fascinated at the power that is ascribed to the clothes. Some of the descriptions posted about "becoming" a woman are silly if not offensive to women. I don't want to be dismissive, on the contrary I am endlessly curious about what drives this behavior and I would love to see some real honest discussion about it.

If I had a boyfriend who was a CD, he would totally be like a science project for me. ;-)

[*Vanessa*]

You're stereotyping

My current man, who I've been with for a year, is the one I will spend the rest of my life with...

There is no need to be so hard on yourself bree, ending ones life while still 'relatively' young is not the answer..

[RenneB]

Wow, this thread has really covered the subject pretty well and I'm not sure what I can add 'cept that I'm sure that when I was still in the womb, my brain stayed female while my body went the other way. Cruel trick I guess, but I'm adapting to this world the best I can.

Renne.....

[LeaP]

... I can also attest that what I'm wearing has very little to do with how I'm feeling on a day to day basis.

I think any CD would be doing themselves a favor by really examining how they feel when "dressed" and trying to get in touch with those same feelings when they're in "man mode". I am always amazed and fascinated at the power that is ascribed to the clothes. Some of the descriptions posted about "becoming" a woman are silly if not offensive to women. ... I am endlessly curious about what drives this behavior and I would love to see some real honest discussion about it.

One might well ask why women, when wearing pants, their SO's shirt, or even unisex wear like sweats, don't suddenly start exhibing stereotypical (deliberate word choice here) male behavior. (And no, that's not a riff on women's pants constituting male dress, either.)

You really have to ask whether it's mimicry, however accurately female behavior is understood, or if it's suppression.

There's a fine line to respect with crossdressing as regards offense to women, however. I get it completely when the behavior and dress seem to mock women or promote stereotypes, even when that's not the intention. Objecting to crossdressing on the basis of a CDer not being GG, however, is itself discriminatory.

Lea

[Cindia]

Some people crossdress because they like the feminine cloths.
Some people crossdress because it is a fantasy or a fetish.
Some people crossdress because it's a way to experience a feminine side to balance out their overly masculine day-to-day self.
Some people "crossdress" because they identify as somewhere between male and female.
Some people "crossdress" because they are repressing their true female gender and dressing up is currently their only outlet for their true self.
Some people crossdress for other reasons entirely. .

It's at least one of these reasons, I think. All I know is I like it and don't seem to be able to stop. Not that I'm even trying to stop anymore, its been a part of me since I was 4 or 5 years old.

[Bree-asaurus]

There is no need to be so hard on yourself bree, ending ones life while still 'relatively' young is not the answer..

HUH?!?!?!? I can't tell if I'm missing some kind of joke or if you TOTALLY misunderstood my post. Are you saying that being with a man is like killing yourself? Or maybe you think I'm referring to myself... but I am no man and have no plans to end my life :P

My current man, is my boyfriend. Our one year anniversary is in 8 days. He is the man I will spend the rest of my life with.

[*Vanessa*]

It's just a simple joke bree - a play on words to reflect your posts "He is the man I will spend the rest of my life with."

[Bree-asaurus]

It's just a simple joke bree - a play on words

OK, I just didn't get it at all... wanted to make sure you didn't think I was gonna kill myself :P