I think I'm "me" no matter how I'm dressed, the shift in my personality when I'm all dolled up compared to when I'm just lounging around in total guy mode, in my opinion, is no different than when a GG is hanging around in her PJ's vs. in her LBD for a night out. I rarely use my old "Alyssa" femm name anymore, but when I do it is no more than a nickname really.
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~Riley
Check out my trans themed standup on YouTube!
My Tumblr Blog
There is just "me". I'm not a different person in a dress, just a little more relaxed.
I've always been in the "me" category, although as some others have mentioned, I do tend to view my masculine side as being "not me", more a character that I invented to hide behind when I was very young.
Carol
My name is Carol.
After staring at a mirror in front of myself in a dress, I did not see anybody else than me, and my first name is too easily feminized to need another one.
I'm thinkin that "we are me". I have a multicompartmentalized personality which is like a cameleon depending on the environment that I'm heading to. I an a changling kindof... Since I've been able to be dressed enfem for the better part of every weekday, it's really becoming quite 'normal' for me. I am what I am and don't have too many quams about it. It's just the way I was born. I'm accepting of that and am working at being the best 'me' that I can be.
Since discovering I was this way at the tender age of 4, I knew that there was something different about the way I felt and acted. Now I'm finally able to act on those dreams and desires to be who I was to be and who I am.
In the end, who knows what will be, but for now, I am Renne.
Renne.....
omg SO many great replies and insights! you girls are wonderful. there's a lot of deep intimacy in the answers, thanks a lot for sharing. <3
yes, now I notice I missed the "Him" option. I see I shouldn't have linked the notion of a TG's primary/secondary gender to a genetic condition. [SIZE="1"][/SIZE]
I also noted that there are clearly at least two (and probably more) layers of choice/action: one internal and another social, that may coexist even when they seem to conflict. (now the "Us" team seems more sane then ever!)
I wonder if there's a language that uses only one personal pronoun?
[SIZE="1"]It is fatal to be a man or woman pure and simple: one must be a woman manly, or a man womanly. — Virginia Woolf[/SIZE]
I used to think that I should see two people or a least two personalities and almost felt guilty that I didn't - not keeping up with club etiquette, somehow. But nothing ever came of it and I know for sure now there's just me - a man who prefers to look like a woman, and whose personality traits are further over to the feminine side of the scale than other men's.
--
Jag (a name gifted me by another member)
It's definitely just me. Anything else sounds too irrational for this engineer. But I have to admit that my wife is right: I do act differently when dressed en femme. I'm not sure how much of this is due to the limitations of the clothing and makeup, and how much is the effect it has on me. What I've learned already from this web site is that there are no clear answers, but I'll never stop trying to understand.
Miriam
Most definitely as SHE or HER. Female pronouns please!
With myself it is me, or if it is in the third person, it is "he" or "him" . I would not be offended if someone used feminine pronouns - as long as I am not considered an "it". But that is not my preference. That is in spite of myself being on m2f hormones. I do not have male or femaie modes, just only my natural mode.
Johanna (John)
Last edited by JohnH; 02-19-2012 at 11:07 PM.
John (Legal name)
Preferred pronouns: he, his, him
[SIZE="2"]On the CD/TG “boat,” I’m the seasick individual who is seated at the rear, using the prevailing winds to my advantage. I have a lovely green complexion, which happens to compliment my light auburn hair color. I really should avoid boats, along with all bandwagons...[/SIZE]Originally Posted by tais
[SIZE="2"]To answer your question, I refer to myself as “Me,” because it (me) is all one unit, regardless of what clothes I’m wearing. However, there is no transformation – I merely amble other to the other side (via clothing). It’s all very natural, and barely worth discussing...[/SIZE]
[SIZE="2"]As I said (wrote), I am ME, so I feel OK with whatever form I take, since I remain the same. In this country “they” insist on making distinctions, in an effort to detect, reduce, control, and eliminate weaknesses wherever they are found. Gender incorporation is a simple concept only open to those who eschew distinctions and engage in the profession of being. If I have to explain why I feel incorporated, or why I am the way I am, or “who” I feel better with, then I might as well try to describe what it’s like to be alive as well. How did I do it? I didn’t – it just happened, or I just WAS, so I AM, and I remain so...I'd like to know how integrated are the two genders in your personality. "I'm two" or "I'm a mix"? And why? (Surely it's possible to be/use both; in this case tell the one you feel better with.)
[/SIZE]
I'm just little old ME, how mush of that is she I don't know yet trying to figure that one out. But its all me I have learned to love me the way I am. I wish it didn't matter what I wore when I go out but right now it does.
"And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom" Anais Nin.
Live, Laugh, and Love Yourself!
calling myself him or her like its someone else is strange.
I sometimes dont get it when someone is like she or her and there talking about me. Im like wait what? me?
Interesting thread. My partner perceives himself as 'she' 24/7...and I still perceive him as quite male 24/7.
Perceptions are very subjective, aren't they?
"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind."
--Dr. Seuss
I've got to think about this a little more, excuse me please?
Tais, now you've really got me in a quandary, because, until this moment, I hadn't even broached the subject of "Who am ‘I,’ actually? You see, I found "Her" during my first makeover and have been looking for that beautiful creature to come back out to play with me again ever since that incredible moment, “Somewhere in Time!”
BTW I just had my third makeover, and much like my second one, "She" isn't quite back, yet.And that's where my problem comes in because I have been living "Her" practically 24/7 ever since that "love at first sight" moment occurred a little over a year ago; which really makes me/myself/I a "Me!”
FYI That big gorilla is narcissistic and it is a perfect portrait of "Me!" (alas, it does not fall under your #2 definition, however).
My real problem, I think, is that I can't get to the makeup part above the shoulders and still be 100% approved by my SO, yet; so I ask you, "How can ‘I’ see 'Her,' er, 'Me,' you see, when it's been ‘Me’ all along?” OMG I'm confused, Thank God it's not by your #3 definition, or I'd really be a basket case, then wouldn't I? Well, maybe I am, at that? I've got to think about this a little more, excuse me please?2. "Me". It's all a unit, even though in distinct presentations and scenarios. There is a transformation, but you'll not become "her"; it's still the same (not quite the same).
"Mirror, mirror on the wall..."
There was no planning around what happened. It just happened. One morning a feminine side emerged and it seemed completely logical that this side should have a name. After a brief discussion the name Tina was chosen. It didn't take long to realize that we wanted to know what role this feminine side had played for 5 decades without knowing she existed. So, we instinctively let Tina develope so we could see who she was, and develop she did!
Tina has a personality, likes and dislikes, a fashion sense (still improving), and a whole list of other characteristics that have been somehow surpressed under my nominally male existence. When I'm presenting as a male, we talk about Tina quite literally as if she were a separate person because, in fact, she really is. Tina and my wife talk about my male side too, and that seems completely natural.
My wife and I talked about this separation and the phrase that seemed to sum up our thinking was that "there is one mind (database!) but two applications of the data stored there".
Frederique Would like to talk to you. PM me please. Hope I didn't break any rules
Last edited by silow; 02-21-2012 at 11:09 PM. Reason: goof
Just me,that is who I am!
I think it's more important to realize if it is semantics of language or an issue of identity.
Identity: I'm me regardless of how I look or what I call myself. There are different personality traits that seem to come up when en femme. I think it has to do with the fact that our own sense of self is a combination of internal traits as well as the external demeanor weighed down by the trivialities and experiences of life. Kae doesn't need to have some of the facades Mike does. On the other hand, I wouldn't say she's the 'real' me either. Integrating the two has happened in many respects and that has made my life better.
Semantics: As above, I referred to her (or to him when en femme) for clarity. If my girlfriend and I are out, maybe shopping, she'd ask "Would Kaela like this?" I refer to the closet with all of my girl stuff in it as "Kae's Closet", etc. I personally would not want my girlfriend to yell across an aisle to ask if a specific piece of lingerie or a dress will fit me.It's just a shorthand or done to avoid confusion or embarrassment.
—Mikaela
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