Spent The Day With Best Friend's Wife

[Persephone]

Today has been a pretty wild ride!

I've come out to quite a few friends because being out-and-about and active in social circles means they are likely to run into me and I don't want them surprised.

A few months ago I came out to my male-self's best friend and his wife. I really feared the worst because, frankly, he is a bit of a misogynist and I didn't think he'd take all that well to finding out that his best friend was kinda girly.

As it turned out, when I finished telling him about my girlself and the fact that I was very out-and-about, he simply said, "But we're still friends, right?"

He also said that he kinda hoped he never met me en femme. A couple of weeks ago there was a costume party and I made sure to tell him I would be there. Since he had planned to go to another event that evening I wasn't expecting it when he and his wife ended up coming to the party.

I was my girlself but, believe it or not, I had decided to wear a costume as a guy! So I was a woman costumed as a man. By the time the evening was finished, he and his wife, his sister, and his niece and my spouse and I all ended up going out for pizza. It got really funny because I ended up just being one of the girls, we were girl talking and giggling, and the poor guy ended up kind of alone at the end of the table.

Cut to today. His wife expressed an interest in going with my spouse and I to an ethnic specialty market that we go to a few miles away. She'd never been, and we were going there today so we invited her. We also told her that it is one of the places I only go to en femme. She accepted our invitation and said that my being myself was no problem.

He had to go off on a week long business trip this morning. His wife took him to the airport bus. Afterwards she came over to our house.

We were all dressed in "shopping casual," except that all of us were wearing long sleeves because the ethnic market is a very modest environment. I wore grey pants, closed toe shoes with 3" (7.6 cm) heels, a grey pinstripe blouse, and a black jacket.

As she walked into the house we hugged and exchanged hellos, after which she did the same with my spouse. She was just totally accepting.

We headed out to the market and spent about an hour and a half shopping. Since we'd picked up a number of perishables, we returned to our house where we put our perishable stuff away and she stored hers in our refrigerator.

Then we all decided to go off to lunch. We selected one of her favorite resturants, a vegitarian place, that she never gets to go to when her husband is home because he's a definite meat-and-potatoes kinda guy. We just had a delightful "three girls talk over lunch" kind of time.

We returned to our place in the early afternoon, she took her perishables and headed out for her other errands. I think we're all looking forward to getting together again soon!

After she left my spouse and I headed off in different directions. My job was to get an oil change for one of our cars. Again, it is a place where I am only known en femme, so a quick lipstick refresh and a change of shoes to open toe wedge sandals with 3" (7.6 cm) heels.

The oil change was quick, although I'm not sure I wasn't slightly overcharged a bit. They also changed the air cleaner filter which really did need changing, and gave me a printout of additional items they suggested for attention. The service guy was very nice and said I really should get a couple of things on the printout taken care of, even if I didn't have them do the work.

I paid with my femme credit card and returned home, arriving slightly after my spouse.

It was only about 3:15 or so in the afternoon, so we decided to head out to a couple of more markets that would have some other items we were looking for.

As we headed out, I received a text from a female friend of our son, asking if she'd left her sunglasses in our car. She had, and we arranged to meet at the market since it is between her office and her home and she was getting off work.

My son had told her about my being transgender, but this was the first time she was about to meet "me." In my text I told her to expect me and, as I figured, she was a bit excited to finally see me.

She arrived at the market, found my spouse and I, said hello and immediately admired my shoes. We were thinking of inviting her to dinner with us, but as it turned out, she had a leak at her apartment and had to rush off to take care of it.

My spouse and I finished shopping and then went to another market to see if they had some things that were still on our list. I had a couple of conversations with the assistant manager as he helped me find a couple of items.

From there it was off to the art supply store to pick up a couple of things including some origami paper that I wanted to get.

By then we decided we were both too tired to make dinner so we went to a local Mexican place, had a nice dinner and a chat about business in today's economy with the woman who owns the place.

And we still got home in time for me to tell you all about it!

Hugs,
Persephone.

[Cynthia Anne]

Very nice story! I think you hae some very TRUE freinds! Thanks for sharing! Hugs!

[kimdl93]

That was a very full day for you and your spouse. I can see whay you didn't want to cook at the end of the day!

[STACY B]

Geez ,, Im tired just reading about it . Long day .

[Sandra1746]

Also a GREAT attention-grabbing post title. At first I expected a little "salacious" gossip fodder but it all was perfectly fine...LOL.

Glad you had such a fun experience.

Enjoy life,
Sandra1746

[Kathi Lake]

And the "Barbara Express" keeps on chugging along!

As you know, my posting has been a bit, . . . curtailed. Your post emphatically deserved a reply. As you know, I'm not much for "You go, girl!" posts, but this definitely warrants a you go, girl!

It is wonderful to see you branching out more and more, gaining confidence - and friends - along the way. How fun!

Kathi

[Eryn]

Great story! Sometimes I think I need to take notes to keep your adventures straight! Thank you for sharing with us!

Side note: Are we treated differently by auto repair people when we are en femme?

[angl]

Im tired just reading about it Persephone

[Dealight]

What a great day, Persephone! Sounds wonderful........
I was wondering about something you said, tho....I am probably just naive....(or definitely!) but you mentioned you paid with your "femme" credit card....I never thought about that before....how did you get a credit card for your femme self (and obviously a legitimate alter identity!)?
Thanks for the great story....I was just a bit jealous but very happy for you!
Hugs, Dea

[Persephone]

Side note: Are we treated differently by auto repair people when we are en femme?

I may have paid more than I should have because I'm just less comfortable with dickering with them than "he" might be and that's more my fault than theirs. Other than that I really can't see a difference. They seem to try the same upsells as they did when I was taking the car in as a guy.

Then interesting thing to me is that they still come to the waiting room and have me come out to the repair area to show me stuff like dirty air filters and to discuss other possible services they suggest. So I have to delicately thread my way through their maze of oil drums and yucky equipment.

They did the same to "him" and sometimes I wonder if it is because their records are in "his" name and they're expecting a guy to stand up when they call "his" name. But I can't quite think that is the case because the service guy writes me up when I come in and is always polite and calls me "Ma'm." And it can't be uncommon for wives to bring in cars and their husband's names to be in the computer.

All in all, they seem to treat us pretty much the same. at least at that particular place. I, on the other hand, cheat! When they ask me about services I don't want to have them do, I'll say something like, "Gee, he (obviously referring to a husband) didn't mention that. I'll have to ask him about that."

I was wondering about something you said, tho....I am probably just naive....(or definitely!) but you mentioned you paid with your "femme" credit card....I never thought about that before....how did you get a credit card for your femme self (and obviously a legitimate alter identity!)?

A perfectly legit question, Dea. I applied for, and got, that particular bank credit card many years ago when requirements were less stringent than they are today. I have gotten other cards since, using my femme name and ID and our shared SS number. My bills are always paid on time and I suspect that despite sharing the same SS number, I may have a better credit rating that "he" does! (But I've never checked).

I'm told that there is another way to do it, but I haven't done it myself, and that is to simply add your femme name to your existing credit card account. I'm told that since "he" will still be the principle cardholder and therefore still legally liable for the debts, that they are less stringent about issuing additional cards. After all, lots of people have their spouse and even their minor children on their account.

There are a few discussions about getting credit cards in your femme name back in the archives.

Hugs,
Persephone.

[serinalynn]

Be careful with those oil changing places. I had the oil in my Dodge Durango changed at a Valvoline Oil Change in San Diego. I drove 495 miles to Flagstaff Arizona when my check engine light came on. I went to a Dodge dealer and the technician told me the oil drain plug was loose and just hanging in the oil pan. The check engine light was caused by a momentay electrical hick up in the throttle position sensor. The tech tightened the oil drain plug and did a 110 point safety check, said everything was good to go and I was on my way.

[Eryn]

A perfectly legit question, Dea. I applied for, and got, that particular bank credit card many years ago when requirements were less stringent than they are today. I have gotten other cards since, using my femme name and ID and our shared SS number. My bills are always paid on time and I suspect that despite sharing the same SS number, I may have a better credit rating that "he" does! (But I've never checked).

Since the SS number is the common identifier, You and he probably share your credit rating whether you want to or not!

The tricky bit is not so much the credit card, but the state-issued photo ID that is often required to verify your identity. Honest CDers will have a difficult time obtaining this and it becomes more difficult each day as governments tighten their grip on their citizens.

Be careful with those oil changing places. I had the oil in my Dodge Durango changed at a Valvoline Oil Change in San Diego. I drove 495 miles to Flagstaff Arizona when my check engine light came on. I went to a Dodge dealer and the technician told me the oil drain plug was loose and just hanging in the oil pan. The check engine light was caused by a momentay electrical hick up in the throttle position sensor. The tech tightened the oil drain plug and did a 110 point safety check, said everything was good to go and I was on my way.

Anytime someone puts a wrench to your car you run the risk of either shoddy work (loose drain plug) or incidental damage. The common loose/stripped drain plug stories is enough to make my male half do his own oil changes. It also makes sure that the high-quality oil he specifies actually makes its way into the car, and in the correct quantity.

Those "110 point safety checks" are just fishing expeditions for additional work. If they happen to break anything while conducting that "safety check" guess who gets to pay for it!