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Thread: I found a Cure

  1. 11-04-2005, 04:03 PM #1
    Brianne_bc
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    I found a Cure

    Recently Ive found a cure for my crossdressing... I was playing on an online dating site, and well I met a woman on there... A woman that I totally fell in love with, head over heels in love with. My desire to dress has gone away. The only trouble is 2 days ago I came out to her about my marriage. I totally broke her heart. and destroyed her. I was a complete mess too and could not hide my distraught from my wife, so I came out to her about falling in love with the girl online who is the picture of feminine softness and strenth. So now im torn to peices three people have been hurt.

    No Heel is Too High.... When it's Pointed at the Ceiling
  2. 11-04-2005, 04:20 PM #2
    Stephanie Brooks
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brianne_bc
    Recently Ive found a cure for my crossdressing... I was playing on an online dating site, and well I met a woman on there... A woman that I totally fell in love with, head over heels in love with. My desire to dress has gone away. The only trouble is 2 days ago I came out to her about my marriage. I totally broke her heart. and destroyed her. I was a complete mess too and could not hide my distraught from my wife, so I came out to her about falling in love with the girl online who is the picture of feminine softness and strenth. So now im torn to peices three people have been hurt.
    Is this real? According to your profile, you're 43. I just glanced at a few of the posts you've made on the forums. I'll assume it's real.

    There's probably nothing you can do regarding the woman you hurt online. Unless you wish to hurt her more, you should leave her alone.

    If you want to save your marriage, you might wish to seek some type of marriage counseling, especially with someone who understands transgenderism. You're married. Having fantasies is one thing; we all have them. Acting on them can be to the detrement of our relationships. I seriously doubt you're "cured" of your desire to dress. You need to be able to distinguish between a rush of hormones and what you want in your marriage.

    If you're lucky and work at it, your wife may give you another chance.
    Stephanie

    Mac - It really does Just Work
  3. 11-04-2005, 04:42 PM #3
    robinLynn
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    your cure to dress is merely on the shelf for now. 2 women are hurt here. your gonna have to look at yourself and make a decision. I dont know the marriage situation. only you can decide if its worth it to jump to a new pasture
  4. 11-04-2005, 04:52 PM #4
    Ellaine
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    I wouldn't be purging, if I were you.

    Ellaine
    Nothing human can be alien to me.

    Those who restrain desire, do so because theirs is weak enough to be restrained.
    -William Blake

    "Anyone who knows how to run a household, knows how to run the world."
    -- Xilonem Garcia, a Meshika elder in Mexico
  5. 11-04-2005, 05:17 PM #5
    Kimberly
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    SOs have gotten in the way of my dressing too (my choice to purge, not theirs,) and it hasn't worked out so far... so my advice is: don't go down this road!!

    ... the urge will come back, I garantee.

    [size=3]Hugs xx[/size]
    [size=2]"You don't have to be fat to be a lady", Sophie 2006[/size]
    [SIZE=1]"Hey, those are nice shoes, but they'd look better in my pants! ... I mean..." Robot Chicken, 2006[/SIZE]
    [size=1]"He's just said a word we don't understand! And he's won at scrabble with it!" - Eddie Izzard 1998[/size]
    [SIZE=1]"Head over heels is fine, unless you're in stilettos." -The Beautiful South, 2005[/SIZE]
    [size=1]"Forgive me. Let live, me." - Antony and the Johnsons 2005[/size]
    [SIZE="1"]"We walk amoung you..." TransAmerica, 2005[/SIZE]
    [size=3]THREAD SUCCESSFULLY HIJACKED[/size]
  6. 11-04-2005, 06:07 PM #6
    Deborah
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    [SIZE=3]I have old fashioned values when it comes to things like this. To avoid conflict i'll keep my opinion to myself.

    However, you dug your hole so now you get to sleep in it.     [/SIZE]
  7. 11-04-2005, 06:36 PM #7
    Lauren_T
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brianne_bc
    ...I was playing on an online dating site, and well I met a woman on there...
    ...but you already have a wife, right?

    Doesn't sound like a cure for CDing, but it sure sounds like a cure for marriage...

    Well, it's your life...

    _________________

    Each new day brings with it affirmations of the reasons why I reject men and their behaviour, and refuse to identify with them...
    Last edited by Lauren_T; 11-04-2005 at 07:55 PM.
    [SIZE=1]
    Marge, you being a cop makes you the Man, which makes me the woman. And I have no interest in that!

    ...besides occasionally wearing the underwear, which, as we discussed, is strictly a comfort thing.
    ~ H. Simpson


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  8. 11-04-2005, 08:04 PM #8
    cindybarnes
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    Brianne, I hate To hear whats happend and hope things at home can work out soon.
    Sounds like you screwed up pretty good
    Were about the same age, been chatting for years , wish I could have warned ya
    if I can help let me know ok.

    Cindy
  9. 11-04-2005, 09:25 PM #9
    Darlene.
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    Given the higher intelligence rating applied to cross dressers, I can not get my head around this kind of behavior. Perhaps unconsciously you want to get out of your marriage.

    At any rate you will now live with the mess you have created. Although I wish it did not have to be that way for you.
    Don't put your life on hold waiting for the world to made right.
  10. 11-04-2005, 09:44 PM #10
    Andrea's Lynne
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    I have to side with Darlene here too.

    That being said, the feeling of being "cured" is only that IMHO. For almost all, that part of us comes back.

    I'm still trying to embrace (and not hide) that part of me

    Lynne
  11. 11-04-2005, 11:17 PM #11
    Faye Emmette
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    Cured !!

    Poor girl, you are in a pickle.
    I hope there will be a happy outcome from all of this, though a lot of silly things have been done and there is a lot of patchwork ahead.
    That's all.
    F.
    [SIZE="1"].
    [/SIZE]
    [SIZE="3"]....... Everything is in Degrees .......[/SIZE]

    [SIZE="1"]intro http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...ad.php?t=16084[/SIZE]
  12. 11-05-2005, 12:17 AM #12
    Billijo49504
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    I have old fashion values too! And what you did SUCKS I think both your wife and your girl friend should kick you in the butt, to get your brains back to where they should be. JMHO Ok not humble.....BJ
  13. 11-05-2005, 12:38 AM #13
    Phoebe Reece
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    Talk about a cure being worse than the "disease"...... there's a good example of what not to do.
    Phoebe
  14. 11-05-2005, 02:28 AM #14
    Toni
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    [quote=Brianne_bc]Recently Ive found a cure for my crossdressing... I was playing on an online dating site, and well I met a woman on there...

    [SIZE=4]Are you for real? - You're getting what you deserve. I was going to say good luck but you don't warrant any of that.[/SIZE]
  15. 11-09-2005, 09:20 PM #15
    Brianne_bc
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    Well my marriage was in the toilet. a woman i married out of lonliness. a great companion but we are really much more brother and sister.

    Anyway thanks for the coments. Some have really fortified my thoughts that for what ive done i really dont deserve to live. My eventual choice is much clearer now....

    No Heel is Too High.... When it's Pointed at the Ceiling
  16. 11-09-2005, 09:27 PM #16
    Brianne_bc
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    ive really never been so alone... as I am today. my councilor has the feeling ive been married to a lesbian. which may work for a CD but not if she is a bulldyke.

    No Heel is Too High.... When it's Pointed at the Ceiling
  17. 11-09-2005, 09:28 PM #17
    oldtown69
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    Well I would not go that far. Nobody is worth any of that!!
  18. 11-09-2005, 09:40 PM #18
    Brianne_bc
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    Quote Originally Posted by oldtown69
    Well I would not go that far. Nobody is worth any of that!!
    i see no other answer right now

    No Heel is Too High.... When it's Pointed at the Ceiling
  19. 11-09-2005, 09:50 PM #19
    Lauren_T
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brianne_bc
    Well my marriage was in the toilet. a woman i married out of lonliness. a great companion but we are really much more brother and sister.

    Anyway thanks for the coments. Some have really fortified my thoughts that for what ive done i really dont deserve to live. My eventual choice is much clearer now....
    Well, that clarification changes things a good bit, at least for me...

    A loveless marriage, and/or one entered into for the wrong reasons - I can't bring myself to condemn anyone in that situation, so I feel I should apologise for being harsh... I criticised without having seen the whole picture, and that was wrong of me.

    So don't let's start with "deserving to live" or any such rot... you have got a situation, no lie - and it seems like it's going to take a lot of soul searching and effort to get back on the right track, but things could be far worse... so don't let things deteriorate any more, just do your bit of penance by trying to figure out the best solution for all... OK?

    Don't take it so hard and don't give up so easy!
    [SIZE=1]
    Marge, you being a cop makes you the Man, which makes me the woman. And I have no interest in that!

    ...besides occasionally wearing the underwear, which, as we discussed, is strictly a comfort thing.
    ~ H. Simpson


    Silly goose, of course that's not me in my avatar![/size]
  20. 11-09-2005, 10:12 PM #20
    Brianne_bc
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    The best situation for all would be for me to be "gone" the best situation for me would be. To be able to patch things with my online lover. end my so called marriage and to live happy and have babies with the woman i really do desire to be with. unfortunatly right now. i dont see that happening....

    No Heel is Too High.... When it's Pointed at the Ceiling
  21. 11-09-2005, 10:21 PM #21
    Bonnie D
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    Briane,

    We all make mistakes, some bigger than others, but there's always a way through them. If you are thinking of suicide please don't, get help. You need to talk to a professional (someone with transgendered experience is best). The world is a big place with a lot of very nice people. There are a lot of very nice people here. You are not alone even if you may think it. Don't isolate yourself and stop feeling sorry for yourself. There are numerous ways of talking to people who can help you feel better and set you back on your feet again. You seem to be living in fear - well I won't get into that there are qualified people you need to talk to who will help you.

    Suicide should never be considered, there is always another way out.

    Bonnie
  22. 11-09-2005, 10:26 PM #22
    Brianne_bc
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    I saw my councilor today who happens to probly be my lovers councilor too. call it womens intuition. I cant deal with being this lonely any more

    No Heel is Too High.... When it's Pointed at the Ceiling
  23. 11-09-2005, 10:29 PM #23
    Lauren_T
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    OK, Brianne, let me point out a phrase you've used twice...

    "right now"

    That's the clinker. No apparent answer today doesn't mean none tomorrow, or the day after, or next week, or...

    Time passes. Circumstances change. Some things clear up on their own. Things occur to you that you hadn't considered before...

    Few things sillier than doing drastic, permanent things because of temporary situations...

    About the value of life, would you take a look here...?
    [SIZE=1]
    Marge, you being a cop makes you the Man, which makes me the woman. And I have no interest in that!

    ...besides occasionally wearing the underwear, which, as we discussed, is strictly a comfort thing.
    ~ H. Simpson


    Silly goose, of course that's not me in my avatar![/size]
  24. 11-09-2005, 10:35 PM #24
    Brianne_bc
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    with my past history and luck in life right now is whats for ever

    No Heel is Too High.... When it's Pointed at the Ceiling
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