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Thread: I need suggestions

  1. #1
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    I need suggestions

    I've been crossdressing for as long as I can remember, and I've been getting a lot of thoughts about living dressed as a woman fulltime, but I dunno how to go about it, if I should move away and start a new life there or just try it and see what happens, I really need some other people's thoughts on this thanks

  2. #2
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    If you live in NYC you do not have to go far to re-establish yourself. And, NYC is a friendly place for alternative lifestyles. The question that arises in my mind is What are you going to do for money? What skills do you have? Are you retired and financially secure? If you are going to relocate I would suggest researching state and local laws that may protect your lifestyle and earning ability. The State of Washington legally protects cross dressers in almost every facet of life. And, some cities in Washington State extend more legal rights than the state law.

  3. #3
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    There is nothing preventing you from living full time cross dressed. Now, if you are looking for a legal change, you can not do that without significant time investment with gender therapists. This is not a move one should take lightly. You're not getting a goldfish. Your loved ones should be a part of any such discussion.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Jacqueline Winona's Avatar
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    Agree with Jen- if this is something you really want or need to do, there's nothing stopping you. If you're worried about other people's reactions and still really need to try this, then consider moving. But if it's just something you like to do, or something you think would be interesting to try, then don't- go away for a vacation somewhere where you can really get into your femme side a little more discreetly. Just know where you're going and what you're getting into

  5. #5
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    First of all if you stay where you are will it cause problems in your personal life or professional life? I am assuming that you are able to retire/live on what you have accumulated already. If neither personal or business relationships would be harmed I would remain where you are.

    I used to move and travel for work. Even with traveling in fem I would be read eventually. So it wasn't a big secret that I was a guy in women's clothes. What I found out was that I was the same person no matter where I lived. I didn't change just the location changed. You can move, but are you going to discard everything about you. If you lived in fem would you like different people, enjoy different entertainment, eat different foods? I found that I wasn't really being denied anything in male mode except for the acceptance of what I could wear. This was my self imposed problem. In truth most of my neighbors over the years figured out that I was a CD. It didn't bother them as much as I feared it would.

    Over the last several years I have become somewhat open about my dresssing. My CDing is know by family, friends, and many neighbors. I no longer have to worry about work/income. I've always been a good neighbor and willing to help out anyone that needed something. I don't try to pass but wear women's casual wear and underdress most all the time. If a neighbor calls or comes over I inferface as I'm dressed. I'm sure that there have been discussions about me, but know of no loss of friends over it.

    In my case I don't really have a desire to live 24/7. I enjoy old friends and neighbors.

  6. #6
    Full-Time Duality NathalieX66's Avatar
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    Both NY and NJ have gender protection laws.....youn can use the bathroom of your choice.
    NYC, as diverse as it is, seems very career-minded. Jump on a train out of Grand Central Station or Penn station , and you'll see what I mean. Lots of family-oriented corporate types on their Blackberry's yapping & texting away. the culture is kind of square-ish.....this is business. The salaries are six figures, and beyond, so therefore, I see lots of family-oriented professionals on the trains. Gays seem to monopolize on the retaurants, and entertainment, nobody can do without them, they're the coolest & awesomest people in the city.......that's why they rule the land.

    However, folks in their shoebox-sized apartments in Manhattan crave diversity, and nearly all evening establishments will accept you......just go.

  7. #7
    Aspiring Member Noemi's Avatar
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    Hi Jess,

    I think about this too. I get stuck with my career, that keeps me male for now.

    Just do it if you really want to. I also can relate to how natural and calming being dressed as a woman is. Then I can like boys all I want and hold their hands and cook them dinner and give them kisses. LOL but true for me.

    If you have been at it a while, do the research, read these boards. There many full time girls here who can give you the ABC's of it, reach out to them, ask for help and you will receive it. But only you can decide to go full time.

    Don't care what people think or say too much. The feelings are what brings us all here, folks outside this have no clue what it is like to be TG'D.

    You feel like a girl, you dress like a girl, you want to experience life as a girl....well you are probably a girl, or need to go a step further.

    Good luck with this Hug Hug hug!
    Last edited by Noemi; 04-07-2012 at 10:34 PM. Reason: sp
    polythene pam

  8. #8
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    I suggest you speak with a qualified therapist on this one. It sounds to me, with little info. from your post, that this may just be a fantasy you would like to try out vs. a NEED to live in the opposite gender; a need that is causing you major conflicts in day to day living. Are you even out of the closet? Do you go to work en femme? Do your family and friends know of Jess? Living full time is not a cake walk by any means. It comes with alot of issues that are only intended for someone that suffers from gender dysphoria and is not something one does 'just to see how it feels '. Many are fooled by the thought and regret ever doing it. Although I am out and everyone that knows me knows I am gender enhanced, I do not wish to live en femme full time. It's just too damn much work and I do not have the NEED necessary to pursue it. Make no mistake, I adore being Jill for weeks on end, but that day of transition back to my male self is welcomed when it arrives.

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