Wow! That's crazy b/c I asked my wife to do that a loooong time ago. Basically I told her that I was thinking of changing it and she should come up with a couple of options. She never did and the name stayed!
Wow! That's crazy b/c I asked my wife to do that a loooong time ago. Basically I told her that I was thinking of changing it and she should come up with a couple of options. She never did and the name stayed!
You know, that's a pretty good idea. Kind of like choosing a name for a baby!Originally Posted by Sandra
I previously worked in rural areas in Latin America for years, and I picked up a tip from Peace Corps workers who were often in my AO. In order to become part of the community they'd frequently adopt an Hispanic name by which they'd be known in the community, and they'd use that name throughout their tour in country. My former name had no Hispanic equivalent (i.e.: George = Jorge) so I'd ask the local children to name me. They loved the chance to give someone a name and it became a good story to introduce myself whenever I'd meet new people in the community.
I can tell you from experience, it's oddly pleasant to have someone you like give you your new name.
I've gone to find myself. If I should return before I get back keep me here to wait for me so I don't go back out and miss myself when I return.
A rose by any other name....
Do it together so that there is no resentment at any time over what is selected.
I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !
Well,, personaly I think it depends ho how long she's been going by Erin, and just hoe engined it is.
My Polar Bear didn't care for my "Wynonna", (said it sounded like a drag queen name) and wanted to call me Stacy. I had to decline in that I had chosen it on behalf of my Native American heritage, and I had been going by that for a very long time before we even met. However, a situation did arise recently... I was wearing something nice and she asked me to do change and do something for her in the yard. And while it had serious potential to be messy, I was all, "I don't have to change to do that".... And I did the messy job without a bit of dirt on me. She and her friend were amazed! I said "I'm just a regular Bree Hodge/DeDecamp" Her eyes lit up and said, yes, that's what we ought to call you... BREE!!! I was like, "Well, my middle name is Brianna, which could be Bree for short"... She was all, I've always liked Brianna, I wish I had known this before" Then I'm, "You have been briefed on this before." then a reference to her stoke and memory loss, so to bring this agonizing long story to a close, she and her friends now call me Bree and mine still can call me Wynonna.
I definitely like the idea of picking a name together. It affirms your acceptance of his female side and eliminates the danger of inadvertently picking a name that has unknown bad connotations.
I'd advise avoiding unfashionable names even as a joke. Now is not the time for teasing!
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
How about picking the name of one of your closest female friends or the name of a woman that has had a major impact in your life.
That's what I did, well I didn't actually go up and ask but the subject came up. My male name starts with a K also so i can keep the same initials.
OMG I literally lol'd when I read this.Choose Suzy and I will scratch your eyes out.
I suggest that you consider using a name that brings pleasant thought/images to mind (preferably to both of you).
Hugs, Carole
What about a name that has both male and female versions(unisex or epicene names) because he is a she sometimes....example.....Kelly,Ashley,Bobby,Kerry, Sydney,Taylor....you get the picture....you can look up the list on google xoxo
OMG, great thread Erinswife!
With all due sincerity to Eryn and yourself, and without questioning the importance of the issue, this is a really nice problem to have!
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I've had many heart-to-heart talks with my SO during the last few weeks, and one aspect has been trying to convince her that "Gaby" is only a pseudo-name for me...
My SO of almost two years has always been a little jealous of "Gaby".
For her, "Gaby" seems to be another woman in my life.
This other woman has been emerging at increasingly regular intervals.
"Gaby" had almost become a label for "the enemy", whoever or whatever that might be!
I hope I've stopped that dangerous development and managed to allay her fears.
I feel very much for her - she has been thrown in at the deep end from the word go in our relationship... at least I know, time is on our side, as I have been honest with her!
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I picked "Gaby" long before I found this forum, because it resembles my real name and it's German.
Initially "Gaby" helped me to identify a femme-self, which I hardly understood.
My male name has always remained my name.
However it doesn't fit my femme-self at all!
But quite often "Gaby" isn't quite right either!!!
My femme-self is with me all the time...
ESPECIALLY WHEN I'M OUT AND ABOUT AS DRAB ME...
That's probably why I find Eryn's offer a wonderfully loving gesture.
I am enjoying thinking about all thisGaby
[SIZE="1"]When Irish Eyes Are Smiling... In the lilt of Irish laughter... When Irish hearts are happy... And When Irish Eyes Are Smiling... [/SIZE]
I seem to be agreeing with Eryn an awful lot.
I really like this option. It meant a great deal to me when my wife and I came up with Bree together. It was a huge part of her 'releasing me into the wild'. Hopefully you can each just throw some names out there and when the other says "Ooooh. I like that too!" you've found a winner.
-Bree
Hi E,s Wife, You could do as I did I never even thought about a feminine name till
I became a member of this fourm I tried all kind of names every one just didn't
ring any bells for me so I thought well Blue is my favorite color and an Orchid
is my favorite flower and that's how Blue Orchid was born.
Gloria is a beautiful name it even has a song about it.
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......
I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !
If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.
Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!
Call her Sugar or Honey, that way you can never make a mistake no matter what the attire.
This is TOO EASY, E's Wife! It's going to be your name, too, u know. So, pick your favorite names. Any one of which you're ok with. Rite them down. Then, give him the list and let him PICK ONE! End of story!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
I agree with jaye_cd. I use Anna Lorree because they would have been my first and middle names, had I been born a girl. I didn't get to choose my male names, so why should I get to choose my female names?
The other way for you to look at this is to select a name you have thought about for a daughter should you have kids. Obviously, you wouldn't name your real daughter the same name as your husband's femme side, so use a second tier name.
Anna
"If you're going through Hell, keep going."
-Winston Churchill
I think it's a great idea based on the reasons that you list for changing. I can't add anything to the names issue that haven't already been said, but I trust you'll find one that you like and he will appreciate.
It is very sweet of your SO, and I should point out that it is a sign that he loves you and thinks so highly of you that he wants you to name his feminine side, it is a real (mutual) honor.
This is exactly what my wife did when I came out to her. When we were out shopping she and she would find a skirt that she thought I might like she would show it to me and say something like "Do you have a white skirt?" Needles to say we got a few strange looks. While walking into the mall one day I suggested she use my femme name i.e. "Does Debbie have a white skirt?"
My wife looked at me and said you don't look like a Debbie you look like a Jill. From that moment forward I have used the name Jill. It's not a big deal but I think it helped her accept my femme side and brought us closer.
I say go for it!
I read through all of your suggestions, which were all great, and last night we sat together and found a name we both agreed on!
I am no longer married to an Erin that I never really knew. I am now married to my husband, AND in a brand new relationship with a pretty great girl named: Audrey
We talked about how we may never use it, except for when we are in situations where identity will need to be preserved. We went to sleep content and happy! Yay!
This is good news Audrey's wife! I like the name. Audrey Hepburn came to mind. Then Audrey from an old western series TV, "The Big Valley" That was the charactor's name, not the actress Linda Evans who plyed her. Opps! I just looked it up, and the charactor's name was not Audrey, it was Audra...close enough. lol That show is on every day on the new network called Me TV that has all the old series we loved back in the 50's, 60's and 70'S
I hope Audrey feels closer to you since you both decided on the name together. Of course I kind of hope the suggestion was yours and not his even though you picked it together.
Shhhhh! Don't tell him! But, I had that name in my head ALL DAY.... We wife's have a way of talking husbands into things without them even knowing!
Edit: when did my grammar go out the window!?!? Wives. Not wife's. Ugh.
Last edited by MandyGG; 04-13-2012 at 08:43 AM.
And we like it when our SO's talk us into things without our even knowing they are doing it. Or at least let them believe we don't know they are talking us into it. But my SO can talk me into anything. Ummm... sometimes that comes in the form of an order! lol
Erin... or rather Audrey, is a very lucky person to have you as his partner! So glad you sorted this!
Kaz xx
__________________________________________________ ____________
This Woman Within is Flying without Wings
Great news, Mandy! U both have names! Now, it's time to get new driver's licenses and passports!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
Heck yes! Where are you taking us??!?! LOL!
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