Page 1 of 3 123 LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 53

Thread: Should I change my husbands "femme" name?

  1. #1
    Audrey Michelle's SO
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    D/FW, TX y'all
    Posts
    486

    Should I change my husbands "femme" name?

    I need your advice. My husband said that I could change his name from Erin to whatever I wanted. He thinks it would do me some good for a few reasons. 1) I have hard feelings about the fact that he was on the adult websites as her, so all of the screen names had Erin in it. 2) He confessed that it was the name of his biggest crush during school 3) He wants me to feel like "she" is mine. So, therefore I can pick a name that I think is beautiful.

    I think it is such a sweet gesture, but oddly I am so used to referring to her as Erin. I do like the idea, and he swore he wasn't "attached" to the name. I would love to finally let the past go, and forget about the website drama all together, and the name Erin immediatly reminds me of it.

    Also, what would I name her!?! I am going to need some ideas if y'all think I should do it!

  2. #2
    Life is for having fun. suzy1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    Hampshire, U.K.
    Posts
    5,124
    From what you say I think you have very good reasons for changing his name!
    I only hope he can move on and forget the associations that the name Erin has for him.

    Choose Suzy and I will scratch your eyes out.


    hugs

  3. #3
    Audrey Michelle's SO
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    D/FW, TX y'all
    Posts
    486
    Suzy is a beautiful name, but my eyes are a wee bit precious! So, I will have to decline naming her Suzy.

    He swears that me changing it would not bother him a bit... So I hope. It's nice to see him work so hard to keep me comfortable and included. I will have to change my screen name for sure now. That will be nice to have an identity of my own instead of just someones wife. The other GG's have been telling me to do that for like a week!

  4. #4
    ADMINISTRATOR Sandra's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    25,347
    Why not try and choose a name together?
    Sandra
    Administrator

    I always used to rib you about your legs can't anymore. R.I.P Sexy Legs

    R.I.P Rianna

  5. #5
    Gold Member Cynthia Anne's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2011
    Location
    Mo. Ozarks
    Posts
    6,746
    Go for it! I think you should pick a name that is speacial to only you! Let her be reborn to only you! I don't want to influince your choice because she belongs to only you! If I could rename you then that would be easy! For your name I would pick Preacious! Hugs!
    If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:

  6. #6
    Slightly Askew jaye_cd's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Gilbert, AZ.
    Posts
    466
    Ask his parents what they would have named him if he was born a girl and go from there?

    Either gender, my father said he would have named me Blue. My mother won the discussion and named me something else (thankfully). She said she would have named me Sonja if I was born female, but chose the anagram instead after I was born. Growing up, everyone called me 'J' or 'Jay' or however you want to spell put my first initial, so I took that phonetically and turned it into Jaye. (Note: If anyone calls me Bluejay I will find you and do things the moderators will delete this post if I divulge....(kidding! but no, don't call me that))

    I guess the point is... take a good look at your SO standing next to you in a mirror all dressed up and both of you start blurting out names. The first name you both say together, run with?!

  7. #7
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2011
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    1,336
    Only speaking from my point of view.

    Honestly, I have no real attachment to my feminine name. My wife and I don't use our names often when communicating with each other (we seem to have an ability to communicate well even non verbally) and at home she calls me by my birth name, even when dressed.

    "Whats in a name? That which we call a rose
    By any other name would smell as sweet"

    The Bard has it. Whatever name you choose, your love will still be true.

  8. #8
    Administrator Di's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2005
    Location
    SouthEastern Ontario
    Posts
    16,149
    I would look at the books or web sights that give the meanings of names. So it means something and is special.
    If you are a Genetic Female (Female at Birth) and would like to join us in the F.A.B. Forum, please follow the link.

    F.A.B. Forum Access

    Sherlyn,My beautiful sweet girl
    You forever and always will be my one and only true love . ❤️


    Administrator

  9. #9
    Senior Member Laura912's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2012
    Location
    East coast
    Posts
    2,559
    Interesting question and you are to be complimented on wanting to find a name with your ownership as well as your spouse. Go through a list of names and pick ten, and then sit down together and do the final selection. Use Google for a list. Look under each letter of the alphabet because you may not care for names that start with certain letters. Once a name is picked, have a private naming party and invite her.

  10. #10
    Member Millie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2012
    Location
    Baltimore, Maryland
    Posts
    100
    My wife and I chose my name. We got Millie, because we don't know anyone named Millie and it fits me.

  11. #11
    Just a girl at heart too Kerigirl2009's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    Minneapolis,MN
    Posts
    803
    I would suggest maybe picking a name of one of Your good friends from your childhood. maybe put a twist on it but then you can have good memories associated with the name you choose and if he is in the closet with everyone else and someone over hears you refer to him as the chosen name, you could say you where referring to a childhood friend.
    I chose my name because when I sign my given name I omit the I in Kevin and it appears to me as Keri as I dot my N in cursive.
    I always liked the name Alicia

    Have fun with it
    Keri
    I wish I had the courage to just be myself and live my life how I want

  12. #12
    a bit nutty
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Ontario Canada
    Posts
    597
    Quote Originally Posted by Silk View Post
    You should mess with him. Give him an old lady name like Eunice.
    Gertrude, a strong wonderful name. Maybe Bertha? My wife has a name for my feminine side but I can't write it here. It'll be censored.

  13. #13
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    A bit south of the 49th!
    Posts
    23,676
    I honk its a good idea. Why live with lingering reminders of past mistakes. Thinkabout a name that elicits positives for you...like a favorite aunt, a close childhood friend or a woman you personally think is attractive.

  14. #14
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    35
    Just an idea you use your first name and then he could use your second name
    real togetherness

    good luck

  15. #15
    Silver Member darla_g's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    terrapin station, you need to guess a little bit
    Posts
    3,664
    Quote Originally Posted by Silk View Post
    You should mess with him. Give him an old lady name like Eunice.
    I like Silk's idea. How about Gertrude and no he can't call himself Trudy?

  16. #16
    Silver Member Tina B.'s Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    North Coast of California
    Posts
    4,230
    An exercise for you! goggle baby names, in the list of sites, I found one that shows the most popular names year by year, not just the top names, but a long list year by year, it's great for ideas, and a chance to see if born a girl what would have been popular at that time.
    Tina B.
    Magic is the art of changing consciousness at will.

  17. #17
    The Girl will Out! Kaz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Yorkshire, England
    Posts
    4,700
    I definately think a new name would be good for the both of you, and I think you should choose it. You need to rename her in a way that is positive for you. I don't know if you have kids, but it should be a similar process to naming a new life in the world.

    I didn't choose Kaz... the name chose me. I woke up one morning knowing this was me. I also wanted the more 'proper' name Karen behind it to give the flimsy Kaz some strength... Karen is very close to my GM name and ironically I subsequently found out that both my GM name and Kaz are in the same name group in Japanese! So it all fits together. But I didn't work it out... it just came.

    Don't think about too hard... just let your mind run free... her name will come!

    But I also like Tina's idea!
    Kaz xx

    __________________________________________________ ____________

    This Woman Within is Flying without Wings

  18. #18
    Aspiring Member Amanda22's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Chattanooga, TN USA
    Posts
    693
    A new name is definitely a very good idea, in my opinion. Your husband is definitely asking you to lead in this, so I think you should take it and thoughtfully decide. As for me, I'd be absolutely thrilled to have been given a female name by my lovely wife. Darn, I should have thought of asking her! Just take your time. I think the name you choose will be very, very touching to your husband. It'll be way more than a name; it'll be the name you chose.

  19. #19
    Audrey Michelle's SO
    Join Date
    Apr 2010
    Location
    D/FW, TX y'all
    Posts
    486
    Thanks for the help, ladies! Some excellent ideas and thoughts! I am now really excited to do this! I will make sure to get his feedback and thoughts on it too!

    Quote Originally Posted by Cynthia Anne View Post
    If I could rename you then that would be easy! For your name I would pick Preacious! Hugs!
    All I can picture is The Lord of the Rings.... it makes me giggle.

    Quote Originally Posted by jaye_cd View Post
    Either gender, my father said he would have named me Blue. My mother won the discussion and named me something else (thankfully)
    Beyonce would kick you for even insinuating that the name Blue is bad! LOL!

    Quote Originally Posted by Adina View Post
    Honestly, I have no real attachment to my feminine name. My wife and I don't use our names often when communicating with each other (we seem to have an ability to communicate well even non verbally) and at home she calls me by my birth name, even when dressed.
    This really stood out to me! When he introduced himself face to face to me as femme the other day, we were talking and I asked him "Who are you right now?" He laughed and said his own name. So, I kissed him.

    Quote Originally Posted by Silk View Post
    You should mess with him. Give him an old lady name like Eunice.
    While that would normally be a great idea, I cant. While I was married to my first husband, and was still oblivious to the CD lifestyle, I would often refer to my ex as "Silva" because he reminded me of a bi+chy old lady.

    Quote Originally Posted by sinead View Post
    Just an idea you use your first name and then he could use your second name
    real togetherness
    Lee is a great option! Thanks!

    Quote Originally Posted by Tina B. View Post
    An exercise for you! goggle baby names, in the list of sites, I found one that shows the most popular names year by year, not just the top names, but a long list year by year, it's great for ideas, and a chance to see if born a girl what would have been popular at that time.
    Tina B.
    On his birth year, his name was #1 and #1 girls name was Jennifer. His second name was #5 and the girl #5 was Kimberly. (Erin was #39, btw!)
    Last edited by MandyGG; 04-12-2012 at 10:37 AM. Reason: fixed quote

  20. #20
    Gold Member NicoleScott's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Mississippi
    Posts
    5,000
    Many of us have changed names. I had to change mine as a precaution when someone got unauthorized access to our home computer. I agree that it's a sweet gesture, and picking a name together sounds like a good idea. My only advice is to not force the name change until the right name comes to you. Relax, it will.

  21. #21
    Silver Member BRANDYJ's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    Location
    Fort Myers, Florida
    Posts
    2,676
    Only once did I choose a name by myself. That was way back when I came out to my first wife. Oddly, she asked me if I had a female name. At that point I had never even considered it . So I came up with Janice since that was a girl I sort of had a crush on in Jr. High. That name was fine for her. After she died, and I came out to mt second wife, she did not like the name Janice, so she changed it to Bridget. So that stuck for about 19 years. My Current SO did not like tha name and she named me Brandy sine we toasted our new relationship on a beach, with a bottle of brandy. I really like the name for several reasons, but mainly because my SO named me and that it is attached to a very romantic week we spent together shortly after we met.
    So I think you should consider a name that you like. Maybe a name of a girlfriend, a teacher, or other female that at some point in your life ment a lot to you. If your husband is as sentimental as me, he will cherish the fact that you gave "her" a name. It's a small gesture that simply says you care and accept her in your life.

  22. #22
    Junior Member DCChris's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2012
    Location
    Washington, DC
    Posts
    88
    If you've fully accepted that part of him, I'd suggest a name that gets you excited when you hear it and you want to spend time with him en femme, whether at home, going out, secret night drives with him. Whatever would get you excited, I'm almost positive, would be highly received by him.

    my $.02

  23. #23
    Gold Member DonnaT's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Northern Virginia
    Posts
    6,608
    Your choice will make it more personal.
    However,
    Quote Originally Posted by ErinsWife View Post
    I am so used to referring to her as Erin.
    If of Irish ancestry:
    Eryn, Eirinn, Bryn ?
    DonnaT

  24. #24
    My Ship has sailed? Barbara Ella's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2011
    Location
    Central Illinois
    Posts
    5,709
    It sounds like there are good reasons to select a new name, especially since he really feels no attachment. You have a wonderful opportunity to bond closer by selecting a name together. One in which you both have something to treasure. Such a wonderful opportunity. You must do it.


    Barbara
    He (she) who would learn to fly one day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance.
    - Friedrich Nietzche -
    I may never get to fly like the other girls, but I do so want to dance, so I continue to climb.

  25. #25
    A Brave Freestyler JohnH's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2010
    Location
    Irving, TX
    Posts
    1,946
    Quote Originally Posted by Silk View Post
    You should mess with him. Give him an old lady name like Eunice.
    How about Louise. Or even better, Maxine.

    John
    John (Legal name)

    Preferred pronouns: he, his, him

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State