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Thread: Who are you or not, Femme vs Drab

  1. #1
    Senior Member 2B Natasha's Avatar
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    Who are you or not, Femme vs Drab

    Hello

    This is to everyone. Transmen and CD/TV/TS/TG. ( man there is a lot of little titles )

    Anyway. Last night I had the opportunity to go out and see and very dear friend. I didn't 'take the opportunity to get my girly on. So I was in Drab. So I walk into the bar/club. My friend spot's me and my SO comes straight over. She had seen a x-mas card with a picture of me on it. So she knew what I looked like. But the rest of the bar did not. They all had never seen me in a drab form. So I wandered into the little alcove that was the party head quarters for the night. Went in and sat done. Now there are about 10 girls there that I have met en femme. So they knew me that way. I just sat down and my friend introduced me by my male name. Further throwing them off, I assume. As I sat there girl after girl looked at me and clearly had no idea who I was. They all had to be introduced to me and told who I was and that they knew me. Heck they even sent one lady out looking for me by my femme name. That conversation happened not more then an arms length away from me. She never found me.

    Who has had that experience. Going out to a bar/club wherever, in there other self who nobody has seen and nobody recognized you?

    I must say also that I was amazed that they all missed me. Like so many others when I look in the mirror I see myself and can identify myself in a flash. assuming that everyone else can as well. ( Gotta love makeup ) But this sorts bolsters the idea that perhaps I am more " Hidden " then I thought.

    Cheers
    You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because your all the same

  2. #2
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    All I know is that at the club I go to, the first time I went there en homme and I told them who I was, they said "What a difference!"
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  3. #3
    Senior Member 2B Natasha's Avatar
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    Thanks Kate. Just what I was thinking I would hear. Just hoped I would hear more. Oh well.
    You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because your all the same

  4. #4
    Breakin' social taboos TGMarla's Avatar
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    I seriously doubt many people would recognize me en drabbe. But like you, there are days when I look in the mirror, and all I can see is me (guy) with a dress and a wig on. And that makes me think that everyone else would see right through it, too. But I doubt that would be the reality of the situation. I may look like a crossdresser when I'm crossdressed (go figure!), but I don't think many people would immediatly know it was me.

    Any money found in the laundry is MINE!


    "This is no social crisis....this is me having fun!"

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  5. #5
    Silver Member noeleena's Avatar
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    Hi.

    Oh dear, our daughter & i did a lot of work on a friends house, cleaning sanding & painting & then i went back later to lay carpert, after i had done the job i told them that ill come back later in the afternoon though you both may not reconise me any way thats okay.

    So i went back & called out hi im on the way in . so i went in to the sitting room & said hi & they asked weres noel . & i said shes here right in front of you , well you should have seen thier faces. they did not get past how i looked or even had any idear i was in fact noel. = noeleena...

    They have not had any issues that im a intersexed woman,

    i forgot about that day . though i did not think even then allmost 6 years ago i did thier job did i pass or were they very surprised, i doughted my self before then & now.

    Every one knows me, my background & when people see me they know who i am.

    Now ,
    yes im a woman whos different would i pass as a woman face wise .....no.....so no matter what i wear people still know me as noeleena. or those who have known us for many years as no-el. = noel,

    Natasha no that would not happen to me as youv said wether im dressed in my work clothes or as my normal day wear, as a woman there is no difference.

    As i sit here thinking about this my friends would not expect to see a woman , how i was dressed i wore my wig & had a bit more makeup on. so i spos i did pass , Hmmmm........

    I have done the same thing with two others as well so wearing my wig & some make up . i was not reconised by them till i smilled thats how im reconised by my smille.

    Okay in a group setting i would be sussed, pretty quick i dont wear a wig, lippy & eye browliner & thats my make up now & a head scarve is my head wear.

    ...noeleena...

  6. #6
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    I think that is a very common thought for all of us. It plays into the fears of being seen by someone we know and thus being outed as well as seeing ourselves in the mirror all the time. I know for me the main thought is that there is a big advantage to using a wig as it draws a very distinct difference between the two looks. So in my mind having long hair makes the two looks more alike. But you still aren't taking my hair from me!

  7. #7
    Silver Member Tina B.'s Avatar
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    We see the man under the makeup because we know him so well, but if you check out the make over page, you can't help but notice how many people look so much different made up, that they look like a whole other person. You must be one of the ones that change that much, I said that's a very lucky thing!
    Tina B.
    Magic is the art of changing consciousness at will.

  8. #8
    Swans have more fun! sandra-leigh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by 2B Natasha View Post
    Who has had that experience. Going out to a bar/club wherever, in there other self who nobody has seen and nobody recognized you?
    Never for me.

    There is a claim sometimes expressed here along the lines of "People are not going to recognize you; no-one is going to expect to see you dressed up." Somehow I am the opposite to that: I am recognized all the time and no-one is startled: cross-dressing seems to be within the realm of what I naturally "project" as being plausible for me.

  9. #9
    Just a touch of class Lynn Marie's Avatar
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    [SIZE="4"]That was a dirty trick. I wandered all over that place looking for a 6'5" hottie in 5" pumps and a mini-skirt. I'd only met you once before a couple of years ago and there you were sitting right across from me! You have an evil streak![/SIZE]

  10. #10
    Senior Member 2B Natasha's Avatar
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    Don't feel bad Lynn. Evie didn't recognize my either. Plus several other couples and people.
    You laugh at me because I'm different. I laugh at you because your all the same

  11. #11
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    I agree with Tina B,even real women change a lot with make up on. A girl friend of mine looks like a guy and has been confuse as one, so she tells me, in more than one occasion.

  12. #12
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    I think those of us who are in home cross dressers are afraid of the encounter with a relative or close friend whose brain is akin to facial recognition software. I've been in social situation where two person not having seen each other for over fifty years quickly identify the other. Why? How? By unique facial features that are not obscured by hair length and hair color. It's the shape of the nose; the spacing of the eyes; the movement of the lips; etc. Yes, the two may have been looking for the person, but, there was still the recognition. I have watched many YouTube videos of transformations, and, I will admit there are some who are truly a 'new' person. So, it is the unique viewer who possesses the inner software of facial recognition. Of course, it is a lot easier to not draw a second look by not being six foot plus and two hundred pounds. If you go to a venue cross dressers frequent, I doubt the regulars are trying to identify every cross dresser who walks through the door. A cross dresser is not going to be out of place.

  13. #13
    Silver Member STACY B's Avatar
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    Not me ,,You can spot me in eather mode ,,Maybe I need to work on my makeup skills ,,An I better not say nothing ,,Then Im clocked for sure .
    Yull Find Out !!! lol,,,,

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