I thought I would post this thought here rather than the general section to reduce some of the disputes going on..
There have been several threads on wives of crossdressers being upset about finding out about the husband crossdressing and what this implies. Several of the GGs have been kind enough to also give their viewpoints. I am glad to here other viewpoints.
So I thought of these scenarios to get to the possible basis for the anger.
What if the secret was:
1) I have to tell you the truth - I like licorice and always have.
2) I always wanted a motorcycle and I want to buy one with 1/2 of the unexpected lottery winnings from my ticket. I will ride it every weekend and you can come along if you wish.
3) I used to play golf before we met, but once we got married there wasn't enough time or money to play. But with the kids gone, I really miss it and want to buy new clubs, join a golf course club, and play once a week with friends. It wan't the same playing miniature golf.
Would you be upset about these secrets? They are not socially unacceptable actions or preferences, so I doubt it. There may be issues with time spent pursuing their own desires. Did they lie about their hidden preferences/desires? They knew prior to the marriage and did not make an issue about it.
So is the difference in anger
1) How society and therefore the spouse thinks about wearing clothes and other aspects defined currently as feminine
2) what this implies about gender, 'lesbian' relationships, etc
I was accused of being delusional, but just want to understand other viewpoints. I am very logical and I acknowledge I don't understand emotional views well. Just the way I am wired, along with other oddities
Thanks for any input,
Ellen