[SIZE="2"]“The sweetest thing... A smell of corrosion... And perfume...” (John Foxx)
Queer is a beautiful word and it’s JUST a word, so please relax...
We are all under the crossdressing umbrella, but isn’t it true that we are all under the QUEER umbrella as well, I mean in a larger sense? Carrying on from the crossdresser/transgendered discussion, I’ve been wondering about the current status of the word queer. If we step back from the “issues” of the present day, with all of the confusing language being bandied about, you may remember that, once upon a time, language was simple, clear, and to the point. Back in the day, we were queer, then we “became” crossdressers, and then we were somehow transformed into transgendered individuals. Language is getting in the way more and more, so is it any wonder that disagreements under our “umbrella” erupt from time to time?
The word "queer" was originally meant to describe something unusual or strange. After that it became a derogatory word to describe homosexuals. More recently, I read that the term has been reclaimed by non-heterosexuals as a descriptive word. Queer can now be used (again) to describe homosexuals, bisexuals, and transgendered people. The word queer can also be used to describe those who practice unconventional sex; therefore even heterosexuals can be defined as queer. We MtF crossdressers certainly fit in there somewhere; in fact we are queer by deed AND association. Queer is a self-affirming umbrella term, but it is still considered offensive when used as an epithet...
Queer is the opposite of straight. If you are behaving, acting, or appearing in a manner other than the ordinary, normal, or usual manner, you are queer. If you have a heterosexual orientation but also have unusual sexual or gender identities, philosophies, or habits, you are queer. If you are whimsical, quaint, erratic, eccentric, peculiar, or unique, you are queer. If you insist on putting yourself in an unfavorable position, like a MtF crossdresser in a conservative community (me), you are definitely a resident of Queer Street. Queerness is a state of mind, cultivated for years and years, bursting forth from the soil of normalcy as an open act of revolt. I know I had no say in the matter, being as I am, but rather than run from my own reality I chose to embrace it. Ahhh...
A day doesn’t go by without my sister and I thanking our lucky stars for being different, and thus queer. She only has a toehold in queerness, while I am up to my waist (or beyond) in it. There’s a show on TV called “Nightmare Next Door,” and every time it’s on we laugh together – surely they’re talking about US! Yup – neither one of us is married, nor do we have children, nor do we go to church, nor are we active in the community, nor are we conservative in any way, shape or form. AND, the icing on the cake, I am a tranny, first class! Of course, she has her odd habits, like not being able to prejudge people or voice hatred at certain groups, and this instilled tolerance has shaped me into what I am. Since I came out to her as a crossdresser, her acceptance (and love) was a foregone conclusion, and she adapted to my declaration with casual aplomb. Yes, we are not like everyone else – ain’t it WONDERFUL?!!!
I often describe crossdressers as deviants, because they are deviating from what is considered normal in a group or for a society, another way of saying queer. A deviant wanders away from the common or “right” way, course, or line. In our case the “line” refers to prescribed boundaries that the genders must not cross, lest we veer into queer territory. Since these borders are largely imaginary, and ready to be challenged by intrepid explorers, I see deviancy as a kind of calling that I simply must heed. Am I deviating from the truth? Hardly. In a similar, synonymous way, perversity is akin to deviancy, albeit with certain unfortunate sexual connotations. A pervert, a practitioner of perverseness (according to conformists), turns away from what is considered to be natural or true. Definition, please? In our case, this means you really shouldn’t be wearing women’s panties, or any other type of clothing meant to be worn by the other gender, i.e. sex. It’s “wrong,” you see...
But, never mind, we wear all sorts of female garments and revel in the feelings they produce, becoming more queer with each passing day, as long as your deviancy is willful and not thrust upon you like an unwanted visitor. Some do not wish to be thus afflicted, perhaps taking a lifetime to come to terms with an unwanted moniker like queer, but some of us seek queerness like a butterfly seeks a beautiful flower. Despite these subtle differences, we are all under this queer “umbrella” that society has begrudgingly provided, and words like homosexual, bisexual, and transgendered tend to deflect any incursions into our allotted space (which neatly resembles a corner). Any understanding that may come our way is left at the door, because language can create walls around communities. To this end I like to explore the language we have all agreed upon. I think it’s safe to say that most people dislike the term “queer,” and yet we MtF crossdressers ARE queer, very much so, at least to the world at large...
You can certainly make the argument that queer is an unfortunate term, and, when hurled at one’s semi-passable state from a distance, it can really hurt. BUT, I wouldn’t want to be like that other guy over there (notice I don’t call him a gentleman), pointing the finger at me because I don’t fit his idea of normalcy – that would be like being in shackles, cut off from my beautiful garden of deviancy, and, yes, blessed queerness. I might even have to embrace ugliness just to fit in! Oh, the irony of it all. I’ll tell you, if I had to turn away from color, not cross my legs, not let the breeze hit my knees, not paint my nails, not revel in the sensations of fine hosiery, not hug myself with selected undergarments, not wear cute shoes, not dangle something dainty from my earlobes, not inhale fragrance, not hold back the tide of unwanted hair growth, not clutch my purse, not feel emotion, not dream, not entertain pleasant thoughts, not calm my inner core (incorporated) being, and not turn away from inherent masculinity by letting HER out, well, that would be a VERY queer state indeed...
I am most definitely queer, and happy to be so. What is your “take” on the word QUEER?
Wife: “What’s on the telly, dear?” Husband: “The queers...” (Quentin Crisp) [/SIZE]