[SIZE="2"]"Hello, my friend, are you visible today? You know I never knew it could be so strange..." (Michael Stipe)
Yeah – what exactly did you DO today, I mean in regards to your crossdressing? We’re all crossdressers, right? For one reason or another we’re dressing in clothes we aren’t meant to wear, or we wear them because we know we’re meant to be wearing them. Tell me what you did...
Did you dress up and go somewhere? Were you out in the open, for all to see, or were you encased in your own little feminine world, bravely challenging the Real World on your own terms? Did you go to a special place, perhaps your favorite place, chosen for safety reasons? Did you do something bold, or did you take your first steps OUT THERE? Did you pass, at least in your mind, or did that even matter? Did you enjoy a life experience whilst crossdressed? Did you drive to the edge of your emotional boundaries, pause, and push on through a little further, or did you turn back? Are you planning your next adventure right now?
Did you buy something new for yourself? Was it something beautiful, or perhaps cute, or magical, the very thing that will lift you to new heights of pleasure? Did you obtain your items in secret, or did you shop for them openly without a care in the world? Maybe a secret package arrived via UPS(!) Did you try on something NEW, pose before the mirror, and dream some girly dreams? Maybe you felt deflated after all of the anticipation dissipated, and now you need some more new stuff! Did you spend a lot of time just touching your femme clothes? Did you do your daily worship at the fetishistic “altar” you have lovingly constructed? Did you smile?
Did you look at your closet forlornly, wondering where to hide things, or how you got so many things in the first place? Did you spend hours with your clothes, trying on everything, or maybe concocting different “looks” for yourself? Did you bathe luxuriously in anticipation of a rare day en femme, shaving your legs, painting your nails, and doing your make-up perfectly? Did you spend hours just DRESSING, and then immerse yourself in the persona you had just created? Did you feel guilty or selfish? Did you think about purging, returning to a life of conformity for the sake of others? Did you wish that SHE had never showed up in the first place?
Did you enjoy the feeling of NOT being male, at least in appearance, for a brief time, or did you spend the entire day as a woman, including feeling like a woman? Did you tuck HIM away, and then let HER out to play? Was it “business as usual” being dressed, or did you spend the day thinking about the next time when you could crossdress in peace? Were you constrained by family commitments, the presence of your wife or SO, or maybe you had to present as a male to put everyone at ease? Were you at least entertaining the female inside of you, listening to her pleas to be liberated? Did you exhibit any signs of being a crossdresser without actually dressing-up? Did you dislike having to BE male for the umpteenth time?
Did you wear women’s underwear under your male clothes? Did you cross your legs at the knee? Did you shave your face, and stick out amongst the unshaven? Did you wear a pink shirt? Did you cry when you watched that movie? Did you display emotion in front of a woman, or another male? Did you read about crossdressing, or other crossdressers? Did you wonder if you really should have been a girl all along? Did you look in the mirror and try to figure out WHO was staring back at you? Did you dream about being all dressed up, and nobody even noticed you? Did you gaze at the sight of your bare knees, just below the hem of your skirt, letting a wave of euphoria wash over you? Did you feel vulnerable, or comfortable, or uncomfortable, or ridiculous, or was this the day you realized you have never felt BETTER? Just wondering...
I’ll tell you what I did today. I’m a printmaker, so I’m making a few new test plates with etching. Of course, I dress up when I work on my artwork – the usual skirt and blouse, practical shoes, minimal make-up, and a short wig. It makes me feel better. Working with volatile acids and greasy materials of all sorts, I have to wear a cute apron to protect my pretty clothes (they are functional, but NOT drab!). I keep clear polish on my nails most of the time, but I also wear gloves (pink, of course) during times like this. Away from the chemicals, I worked in my studio proper with a fan blowing a cool breeze up under my skirt – it’s been warm, you know. Later, I changed into a different outfit for these typing sessions, using the interim period to visit my sister downstairs. As soon as I returned to my upstairs domain I got back into “Freddy” mode, if you will, and I continued my work. Also today I watched a movie on DVD (in segments), and, yes, I admit I cried, but I also smiled A LOT!
What exactly did you do today? [/SIZE]