In my case my wife knows that I like to cross dress but doesn't know that I'm actively dressing in private. Her stance is that she'd rather me not do it at all, but if I do, then I need to keep it to myself. I'm OK with that for now. I fear she'll still be mad if/when she finds out that I'm still dressing, however, it's for me to decide when to stop. If such a small thing like wearing a pair of panties, or some heels, in private is enough for her to ask for divorce then I guess our compatibility wasn't good to begin with (I told her before we were married). This is as much as I'm willing to compromise.