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Thread: Why cant I meet girls to go out with?

  1. #1
    Member RachelRoxx's Avatar
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    Why cant I meet girls to go out with?

    I want to go out so bad but I dont have any CD friends to go out with. Yea I could go out by myself but I find that just depressing and for someone like me who has never been out it would be uncomfortable. I just want to meet one or two girls I can get all dolled up with and go to a CD friendly event or something. I look everywhere, yet it seems like nobody wants to take the time to help a newbie break out of her shell except men and thats not what Im looking for. Any tips or good ways to meet some girlfriends?

  2. #2
    Junior Member GrayGirl83's Avatar
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    I had the same problems (and still share the same feelings about going out by myself). I'm a newbie myself and do feel like I need a friendly, painted-nail hand or two to help me out of my shell as well.

    Honestly, just keep talking to people and meeting them on the boards. I haven't gone out yet, but I've met 2 or 3 different groups/gurls who I'm beginning to make plans for outings with now. I think it just takes persistence.
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  3. #3
    Platinum Blonde member Ressie's Avatar
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    Have you tried the meeting place forum? It's worth a try.

    http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...-Meeting-Place

  4. #4
    Duchess of Eyeliner Erica2Sweet's Avatar
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    My first couple of experiences out in public in broad daylight I accomplished by myself. I felt I had to make those first steps on my own so afterward I could feel completely responsible for the success or failure of the outing. I was pretty nervous so maintaining meaningful conversation with others would have been a challenge anyway.

    Later outings with my wife proved to be more fun, but I was glad I had a little experience beforehand and was able to acquire an idea of my strengths and weaknesses in terms of my presentation.

    So I recommend you don't hesitate to venture out instead of waiting to meet others to help you do what you likely should be able to do on your own. Then, once you're out and about, by default you're increasing your chances of meeting others to socialize with exponentially.

  5. #5
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    You first have to be willing to go out. If you are alright with stepping out your door there is no reason you can't meet someone to go out with. Try some of these groups:

    http://www.meetup.com/patgirls/

    http://www.tgguide.com/Guide/pennsylvania.htm

    http://transgender-women.meetup.com/...ts&radius=25.0

  6. #6
    Member RachelRoxx's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jorja View Post
    You first have to be willing to go out. If you are alright with stepping out your door there is no reason you can't meet someone to go out with. Try some of these groups:

    http://www.meetup.com/patgirls/

    http://www.tgguide.com/Guide/pennsylvania.htm

    http://transgender-women.meetup.com/...ts&radius=25.0
    I am ready to go out, and Ive joined a few groups on the meetup website. I think those groups will be my best shot to meet some friends to go out with.

  7. #7
    Member RachelRoxx's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Erica2Sweet View Post
    My first couple of experiences out in public in broad daylight I accomplished by myself. I felt I had to make those first steps on my own so afterward I could feel completely responsible for the success or failure of the outing. I was pretty nervous so maintaining meaningful conversation with others would have been a challenge anyway.

    Later outings with my wife proved to be more fun, but I was glad I had a little experience beforehand and was able to acquire an idea of my strengths and weaknesses in terms of my presentation.

    So I recommend you don't hesitate to venture out instead of waiting to meet others to help you do what you likely should be able to do on your own. Then, once you're out and about, by default you're increasing your chances of meeting others to socialize with exponentially.
    Good info, thank you. I thought about going out on a small daytime outing on my own but the one thing that scares me is m height. Im almost 7 foot in heels and 6'6 barefoot. Its such a dead giveaway I feel like Im better off sticking to TG events and such instead of the general public. Maybe thats a cop out I dont know. Maybe even just going for a drive would be helpful.

  8. #8
    Sapphic GeminaRenee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RachelRoxx View Post
    Maybe even just going for a drive would be helpful.
    I find going for drives to be quite liberating. The hardest part for me is getting out of my apartment, with all my nosy neighbors and their prying eyes. LOL. But once I'm on the road en femme, I hardly even want to go back. I can always find parks that aren't excessively crowded to walk around in and take some photos. Just go for it, I say. Even if being around other cd'ers would be ideal, just getting out and being you outside of the walls of your home is always worth it.

    I do understand your frustration though. I'd like to meet others in my area, but it seems like there aren't really any effective channels for it besides going to the local gay bar on drag night. So I started heading out on my own, in low contact situations like I mentioned above, and I'm very glad I made that step. Even though it wasn't quite what I wanted - at least I'm taking some steps to live as I want. And that's a whole lot better than it was before.

    Good luck! (:
    "She ain't waiting 'til she gets older, her feet are makin' tracks in the winter snow.
    She got a rainbow that touches her shoulder, she be headed where the thunder rolls."

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  9. #9
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Did you try the Renaissance TG Org. in King of Prussia Hon?
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  10. #10
    Member Misty_VA's Avatar
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    You should look into the Monday Night t-girl party in Philly.

  11. #11
    Junior Member BrendaAlexandra's Avatar
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  12. #12
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Go out to a "friendly" bar, be open and smile and introduce yourself to the other "girls". Expect some cold shoulders but if you knock on enough doors someone will take you in. We don't always bite. Just be friendly (and not sexual). When you meet a few, they will introduce you to a few more and so on. But you have to get out here where they are. I found very few T girls knock on your door asking if you want to come out and play.
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
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    “Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,

  13. #13
    Full-Time Duality NathalieX66's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kate Simmons View Post
    Did you try the Renaissance TG Org. in King of Prussia Hon?
    I've never been to Rennaissance, but I have met many in my area who have. It's the same crowd as Angela's Laptop Lounge that meets in King of Prussia.
    Philly has a pretty awesome TG scene no matter what your status is. ...part time cd'er/hetero/married/bi/this/that/ transsexual, it's all there......pick your spot and go.
    I belong to Mid-Atlantic Transgender group on facebook, and I have met awesome friends.
    Many eastern Pennsylvania people end up at the Keystone Conference in Harrisburg in March. We all know each other.
    Last edited by NathalieX66; 09-10-2012 at 06:25 PM.

  14. #14
    amy wanagione's Avatar
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    Rachel, you live in phila. there are more places to go and more girls around here than you can imagine. Nathalie named a few places where everyone meets near and in phila. girl there should be no excuses! Get out there and haved fun! You can contact me if you would like to chat!

  15. #15
    Member AlisonRenee's Avatar
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    The meetup.com group that Jorja mentioned looks like a good opportunity. We have an active TG meetup group here, there's all kinds of group events. It's a lot of fun. I know some of the ladies in this group are members of this site as well.
    [SIZE="3"]Ali[/SIZE]

    [SIZE="2"]"You're as beautiful as you feel"... Carole King[/SIZE]

  16. #16
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    I'm not familiar with Philadelphia, but I bet there is a TG group there that you could contact.

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