So this is my first post. I guess I mostly just wanted to make this post as an entry point into this forum and share my story.
I sympathize with a lot of the posts that I see on this forum. I have always had an close connection with my feminine side. Growing up it just seemed more interesting for some reason I am still not sure why. However, it seems that I am not alone. I would try to ignore my passion for the female look. During different times of my life I would secretly examine my sisters clothing and I payed particular attention to the combinations that would be used. As I grew up I found that I would correct my girlfriends clothing and was always fascinated with the soft, silky and smooth feeling of the fabrics used for female clothing. To this day I think I drive my wife crazy because I make comments about what other women are wearing and how their outfits are accessorized. I just believe the old saying,”Imitation is the most sincere form of flattery”. I am so infatuated with the female form that one of my biggest desires in this world is to imitate it as closely as possible.
Throughout my marriage I would wait for opportunities when I had the house to myself and I would carefully go through my wife's clothes and try them on. It started small with nylons, panties and lingerie and gradually moved to pants, blouses, skirts, and dresses. I really enjoy the process of putting together an outfit and seeing it come together as I get dressed as much as I love the relaxing feeling of being fully dressed in female clothing. Each item has its own properties that just make me feel special. The nylons are smooth and silky, a skirt accentuates curves a flowing blouse feels so light an airy. Its just just a simple and relaxing pleasure. Although I have felt very alone and in my own little world. I enjoy dressing up but the solitude of being the only one to enjoy it and having to keep it a secret is the difficult part.
Last year I finally came clean with my wife. Like many other posts I have seen about the situation of bringing a significant other into the circle, I eased into it. She was shocked and emotional at first. Slowly we talked and I explained that I am still the man she married, except now she knows the secret that I have kept from the entire world for my whole life. I assured her that I was not gay or interested in being a woman full time. I just feel comfortable from time to time dressing as a woman at home. I also explained to her that at this point in our marriage I felt that we were close enough that I could entrust her with my deepest and most sincere secrets. So far she is very accepting although her participation is minimal and I am not pushing at all. I let her move at her pace and participate at the level that she is comfortable. For the most part I still dress mostly when I am alone at home but now my wife knows that I have my own women's clothing and I keep some in my closet. So far my wife is very accepting and has made me feel comfortable. From time to time I wear heals around the house just because I like the feeling of walking in them and my wife does not seem to mind. I painted my toenails the other night while we both sat on the couch and she gave me some guidance on how to make them look even better.
On the bright side we have always done a lot of shopping together just because. I have always enjoyed shopping with her and going from store to store. She has gone shopping with me in the past for panties and nylons which was both exciting and scary but it worked out well.
I thoroughly enjoy under-dressing, meaning I wear lingerie as much as possible under my regular clothes. I wear women's panties exclusively everyday now. It was exciting this morning when I caught my wife peeking around the corner and watching me put my panties on. I asked her if she like watching me put them on and she replied back that she did. I am hoping that someday that we can have a dress up night and both get all made up and have a relaxing night together.
I am very excited right now be cause my wife left out a catalog last night and it seems like maybe she was targeting me with it, knowing that I would see it where she left it. The catalog was from a local store for women's clothing, when I looked though it I found a fabulous dress that I really want. I checked and the store has one in my size. I am going to try and go after work today and buy it I just hope they actually have it in stock.
