i need a little help here but it may be nothing

[Alice of The Night]

So if any of you have read my other post youll know that my wife is supportive and even involved. But sometimes its.... Awkward she makes jokes and seems disinterested. We have talked and she says she enjoys my dressing and usually seems to. But i dont do it as often as id like to because i dont want to push her. I fell like she may just be tolerating because she loves me but i dont know how to tell for sure. Honestly she doesnt have a very high sex drive anyway but thats not really a big problem. Im just wonderin how i know wether or not she is actually interested and enjoying herself or if shes just trying to help me.

[Jenniferathome]

You have to talk about it. And not while dressed. She can be "ok with it" and still be disinterested. Frankly, I think that is the typical position for wives who accept this side of us. You have a great situation, you wife can accept this part of you. Participation is not promised nor should be expected. Sit down and talk. Say all the hard things, leave nothing out and you will have your answer

[suzy1]

I was going to reply but Jenifer put it perfectly. Listen to her.

[Laura912]

What they said above.

[avant1465]

This is information that you have to get from her. Take some time when you AREN'T either dressed.... OR, you and she aren't in a quiet moment.... and bring up the subject as if it was - say - a prospective trip to the Bahamas or Hawaii... and TALK IT OUT!!!!

You may find (hopefully!!!!) that she is more "in" to your C/D-ing than you know... and the silence (between you) has kept her from being able to openly endorse you......

Good luck....

[Silentpartner GG SO]

To be honest, your wife sounds as though she is fine with your dressing but she probably isnt always that interested. It's your 'thing' not hers. You are the one that gets something out of the dressing and your wife is likely very happy to see you happy but dont expect her to be as enthusiastic as you are - why would she be? the most she is likely to be getting out of it is the pleasure of seeing you happy. Be content with that

[BRANDYJ]

I agree with my friend Silentpartner above. (hi doll!) Think about it. What are you expecting of your wife's interest in your dressing? She is supportive and involved. What more could you want? Don't expect her to be thrilled with it. She's happy for you. That's good and should be enough. You are smart to NOT dress as often as you want and not push her. All to often we see that supportive and involved wife do a 180 because the dressing gets out of control. Most women married and want a man. They do not want to see their man dressing 24/7 even partially. They need to see their husband for what he is...a MAN.
So your wife makes jokes about dressing? I look at that as a healthy and fun way to interact with you. If we can't take a joke about this "strange" thing us CD's do, then we have a deeper problem. If we can't laugh at ourselves and have a loving wife join in with the jokes, then we are not accepting ourselves and having fun with what it is we do.
If all other issues are OK in your marriage, then even if she is just really tolerating your dressing, then so be it. Tolerating, supportive and participating are all good things. Just ask any other married CD's that don't have even tolerance from their wives, let alone support and participation.

Your opening line said it may be nothing. I tend to agree, it's nothing to worry about. Push her and it may be something to worry about. So gain, you are doing the right thing by not pushing it.

[~Joanne~]

Liked stated above, don't push it on her. Do it privately for periods of time. At least your not out and if she comes home and finds you dressed it won't be that big of a deal. I recently came out to my GF and have felt that I have pushed it a bit and have decided that after last night to back off a bit. My plan has never been to dress in front of her every time i get dressed.

[franlee]

I have had 3 wives and all were/are accepting and supportive, but they are never going to enjoy my dressing as much as I do. So it's only natural that she isn't going to be as intusiastic as you or as you want for that matter. Don't sweat the small stuff and enjoy. There are a multitude of CD'ers out there that would give their last dollar to have what you have. And as long as she is laughing with you you are "Good."

[Miriam-J]

I agree with Silent Partner on this one. I have a lot of activities that don't interest my wife, like working on car engines or playing basketball (though the thought of watching glistening male bodies does seem to have some appeal for her). It's okay to have some separate interests. As long as she doesn't object you're doing fine. Many on this forum would be more than happy to trade places with you on that.

Miriam

[kimdl93]

As Jennifer says, the question should be directed to your wife. Enjoying this can mean a lot of different things...so the challenge for you is to keep talking until you can relate back to her what you understand...and she says that ,now, you understand.

[ReineD]

I agree with the others ... you need to ask your wife how she feels. But, I can describe my own situation and maybe there is a parallel.

I barely notice whether my SO is dressed or not. This is not a comment on her passability, of course she passes, but to me, s/he is always the same person no matter how dressed. I try to remember to tell her that she looks nice when I see her dressed or at least comment on a article of clothing or jewelry but truthfully I don't always remember, just like s/he doesn't always remember to tell me how nice I look ... which happens when couples have been together for awhile. So to an onlooker it may appear as if I'm disinterested in him/her but I'm not ... I've just gotten so used to seeing him/her in both modes that it is all rather commonplace.

If your wife has gotten to this point, I should think this is the highest compliment she can give you. It means that she is always seeing the person you feel you are inside and the exterior presentation takes on a secondary importance. I should think that many CDing husband would love to be in your shoes.

[JessicaMay]

Just a random thought, perhaps she just sees you either way. You're not special every minute of every day, so if she accepts that you dress than eventually that's not going to be as special to her every moment. I've noticed much the same thing with my wife, who is absolutely wonderful and supportive. We'll be chatting and sometimes she can't keep her eyes or hands off me, and other times we just hang out like old friends.

Part of that is why she is so accepting is because I am a long lost girlfriend to her. That's the way she treats it, and it's cool.

Certainly talk to her, but I'm willing to be it's just not that big a deal to her and ultimately you're still you.

[Beverley Sims]

This is a subject I would bring up occasionally whilst not dressed.
You will need time to broach the subject periodically and you will eventually find what her true feelings are.
Others have already answered the post with like advice anyway.
Just do not push the issue.
Try and abstain for periods of a week now and then and see what the reaction is.
I know that will be hard but you need to get your wife's curiosity going.

[Rondawants]

I don't know if you truely know or not! However my wife don't really like it, but as time goes by and I dress in something everyday she seems to be getting use to it! I don't think she don't like it, but she never says alot. When I shaved my leggs I caught her looking at them in the kitchen. She never said a thing. Later I spoke of some uncented lotion and she didn't have any so she said she would get some when she was out today! Maybe sometimes we need to just relax and enjoy. And most inportant talk!!!! Loves Your friend Ronda!!!

[Alice of The Night]

Thank you all so much ladies i couldnt imagine a more helpful group! And just so you all know we talked and my dearest mozie informed me that it she actually very truthfully does enjoy alice almost as she enjoys the other part of me. She said she loves me no matter what im wearing and wether or not she is turned on or interested depends on her mood not my clothes. Again thank you all