Hints for Shopping En Drab (guy mode)

[Tina B.]

When shopping in drab, remember one thing, you see gender, the store sees green, it's all about the money. I have not had a SA give me the look in 15 years or better. I used to avoid young checkers, and men, and I've found lately young male SA's don't seem to care either.

[sonna]

just do it....................

[CynthiaD]

I've shopped in drab at almost every store in my area (central Texas) that carries women's clothing. I don't rush. I take as much time as I want. When I check out, I go to the shortest line. I don't care how old the check out person is, and I don't care what gender they are. I've had a couple of odd looks, but it happens so seldom that it surprises me when it happens. Take my word for it, shopping in drab is no big deal.

[STACY B]

I got it ,, But what do I do with my Purse ? An how do I get my money out when I get to the register ?

[Cassandra Lynn]

Since I don't present in public, I have to buy my female clothes while dressed in normal, that is boring guy clothes. Here's a few hints to those who may find this type of shopping necessary, but intimidating:

1. Scope out the store beforehand. Know where the things are that you are interested in a few days before going into shop

I get that your trying to be helpful, but i can't help but point something out, forgive my sarcasm and all that.

I'm really hung up on idea #1 here.

I assume that the "scoping out" trip would require actually entering the store, so since your going to be in there, if you do see something you like why not go ahead and purchase it then?

A. It might be gone a few days later
B. You'd save yourself another trip and with today's fuel prices, you might as well spend the dough on the clothes.

I'm not sayin....i'm just sayin

[Meghan]

Just thrown in a pack of gum, or a candy bar, and everything will be fine!

I have heard everything in my 20+ years of shopping. I had a hard time buying a wig in Oklahoma once, but in general I have never really had a problem.

One recommendation: be prepared to deal with this question: "is this for you?"

It seems to come up a lot, at least for me, and typically it's younger cashiers who I think are naturally being curious more than anything else. Usually, I smile and just say "yep, do you think it will look good on me"? Foundation could be for TV work...for example...so whatever works best for you but be ready for this one because it could throw you.

Beyond that, shopping in drab used to be a bit nerve-wracking because of the off chance that I might run into someone I know, especially when I was closeted. Now-a-days, I simply don't care.

Carry yourself with confidence and you'll be fine. I have never, ever been denied when trying to by something. I have aborted a trip or two for one reason or another, but generally speaking, the rush from not knowing how it will turn out is often the best part of the shopping trip!

Meghan

[bridgetta]

Yes yes yes. Exactly right. The fact is you are allowed to purchase what u want

[EllieOPKS]

I used to be so timid going into the ladies section of a store I would almost have to double down on my blood pressure meds. Then it hit me one day. It's like playing poker. YOU are the only one that knows what's really in your hand. I've decided there are only two scenarios that you need to address. At the check out, if you want to keep everyone at ease you can always request a gift receipt with the purchase.
The other circumstance is the very very rare sales assoc. that thinks they own the store and this actually happened to me about a year ago. I was in the lingerie section and the SA (an older lady btw, you know the type, with 1/2 lense glasses on her nose connected to a chain around her neck.) in a very obnoxious said "WHAT are you looking for???" my answer was direct and without hesitation "I want to look at crotchless panties about half your size and if you have anything edible in cherry or strawberry I want to see those as well". The look on her face could have stopped a watch.

[jsunic_1978]

The younger ladies and also the guys now are always friendly. society is finally coming around.

Also, shopping in drab is the best way to start. SA gets to know us. Then I go as Jenn. ALWAYS HAD GREAT EXPERIENCES The SA even walks with trough me trough the store, carries on conversations and really goes out of her way whater I know exactly what im looking for or need advice as they always are very polite and helpful. It's not how we dress, its how comfortable we are with our selves.

[Jana]

Been there, done that. Good tips for the more unexperienced/shy crowd. And remember, in the end, your MONEY interests stores far more than WHAT you actually buy. So, ladies, shop till you drop!

[outhiking]

I get that your trying to be helpful, but i can't help but point something out, forgive my sarcasm and all that.

I'm really hung up on idea #1 here.

I assume that the "scoping out" trip would require actually entering the store, so since your going to be in there, if you do see something you like why not go ahead and purchase it then?

A. It might be gone a few days later
B. You'd save yourself another trip and with today's fuel prices, you might as well spend the dough on the clothes.

I'm not sayin....i'm just sayin

I'm usually scoping when shopping with my family or my wife. Plus sometimes have to wait for the paycheck to roll around.

[Angela Campbell]

It is really no ones business who you are shopping for. I have been married twice and both times my spouse would not go shopping. They both hated going in a store and also had bad taste in clothes, so I did the shopping for them. I knew the sizes, the styles they liked, colors and such. I just went into a store and bought what I needed. No one ever asked me who it was for, no one ever called the police on me, no one really noticed. Now if I am shopping for myself I don't really care. If someone asked me who it is for I would tell them...ME. No need to lie. It is not against the law for a man to buy panties and a skirt and top.

My advice for a newbie........just go buy what you want. No one really cares if it is for you.

[JohnnieCD]

I've visited a stripper boutique in San Antonio called Secrets Boutique by Carie that advertises to be CD/TG friendly. They are a custom shop, it's in a sleazy part of town and I was apprehensive about going there and drove past a few times before I got the courage to go in. They sell male posing suits so I decided those would be my reason for shopping which as it turned out, I love the suits. Rocking bright colors and sexy tailoring as well. Anyway, the sales staff is very friendly and pointed out the limited number of male suits and said they sell most of their suits online, but will custom make anything I want.

They have some of the cutest GG outfits that are actually casual wear that I would love to have but afraid of embarrassment to inquire. I'd really like to have CD/TG friend that has already over came this fear to go shopping with to settle me down. Does that sound weird?

[outhiking]

Naw, not weird. I think we all find comfort with others who have similar experiences.

[StarrOfDelite]

So true. Good advice for starters. Remember that any establishment the opens their doors for business just want to make sales. I bet if you didn't pass in the least, you could go to Texas, go to a gun store and buy a weapon and the SAs would treat you wonderfully. Now, after you leave the store - run!!!!!!

If armed to the teeth why would you run, you'd be the meanest mutha in the valley!

[JenToronto]

Excellent tips!!

[Wanna be Heather]

you are absolutly right although I am just new to CD, I went shopping for myself several times and i always get help from the staff.

[joanna4]

I really like to shop en femme. Making the purchase of a sexy crop top or mini skirt feels natural. The hardest part of shopping en femme is still getting out of the car/walking in the store. It is important to pick the perfect time. I either go really early or really late. I am more comfortable in a store with less shoppers and SA's. They WILL see you but if you are in a particular spot of the store, not that many people will be right next to you when you are shopping. Another thing is parking, finding a good parking spot for in and out without getting your car noticed if you drive a vehicle that stands out.

[lingerieLiz]

The first time I went shoping for panties I was so nervious that I heard a SA tell another, See him he is trying to shoplift those panties. I almost ran out of the store I was so embarrased. Soon after I went to work in a clothing store. I actually did watch a guy shoplift a bra. I told the SA, but he was gone before she could do anything. Ended talking to her about what i was after and bought a slip.

We are our own worst enemy. Relax, walk in, browse, try on, and enjoy. I'm a people watcher, but have discovered that women don't like being watched while buying lingerie. If you want to clear out a section of lingerie. Just stand in the area and watch the women. They become uncomfortable and will disperse. I've had a woman ask me one time if I wore bras to which I responded yes. She was shocked, but OK with it. I've talked to women shoppers in the lingerie department about inventory. Had one woman walk up and tell me she wished her husband was as comfortable as I was with helping my wife and her friend get the right sizes.

[Annie M]

This one sort of bothers me I often see women buying men's cloths and shopping in the mens department yet as men we are scared S#$tless to even enter the domain of women's department. We break out in a cold sweat if we have to go to the cashier, we case the place like we were planning a bank robbery. You even see men who will hang on the edges of the department while their wives shop... "ya wont catch me touchin' women's stuff... " Personally I love the women's wear departments even if I'm not buying for me! the colors the feel and styles no wonder I like to wear women's clothes. Go to the mens and you get 50 shades of brown gunny sacks, oh boy. So why are the macho men afraid of buying women' stuff, just do it, you don't need to explain to the cashier really you dont. Men can be so gutless at times.

[Tora]

By shopping in Drab, underdressed, at smaller shops, or Macy's, the recon will tell you about the dressing rooms and staff. I have found a semi private dressing room at many stores. The smaller shops, I try to shop early and will respect the GG's shopping, so as not to cause a stir. I am not ashamed, just want to fly under the radar. The SA's are well aware of my presence and intentions. How else can we be certain about proper fit and appearance, without trying on a item. The BIG box stores are too big a hassle, for me.

[Layla Michelle]

I'm new to San Antonio and a novice CD as well. I've been to Secrets and the staff was super friendly and non-threatening. I'm also looking for friends to shop with, hang out, experiment with makeup, etc. Let me know.

[Jamie001]

Since I don't present in public, I have to buy my female clothes while dressed in normal, that is boring guy clothes. Here's a few hints to those who may find this type of shopping necessary, but intimidating:

1. Scope out the store beforehand. Know where the things are that you are interested in a few days before going into shop

2. Read up about the clothes, make-up, etc. that you are interested in so that you shop prepared and have an idea of what you are looking to purchase

3. Go in just after they open on a weekday

4. I like to be well groomed and in business casual clothing (hoodies and sunglasses make me feel like I look like a potential shoplifter)

5. Walk confidently to the area that you are intersted in and browse for the item(s) you want. Smile pleasantly at anyone who looks your way

6. Double-check that the size is correct and that the item has not obvious flaws - who want to come back for a return. Use a basket so that you can fold the article into it and it won't look so obvious

7. Walk calmly to the register, smile at the cashier and make your purchase. You are doing nothing illegal, immoral or shady

All-in-all, you can get in and out in about 10 minutes and with each trip you'll gain more confidence and find that you can start to browse a little more leisurely and actually start to enjoy the process. Shop for pretty things at first if you want to look like you are buying for your significant other, but then go for it.

Good luck!

You forgot the most important step which is trying on the article of clothing.

[jsunic_1978]

Im always wearing womens sneakers and jeans while in drab. womens shoes just look so much nicer. nikies, champions, asics. Now I want womens puma and adididas

[Ms. Laura]

Ach! I'm so jealous of all you brave shoppers! I go in and turn beat red, I swear! I can shop for my wife, but she's a 2! No mistaking that.

Thanks for a good thread on tips, techniques, breathing and just not worrying about it!