Nature of crossdressing - addiction or disposition ?

[linda.wai]

Discussions ongoing in another thread has made me ponder over this question again.
[SIZE="5"]"Will urges to crossdress increase if we engage in CD more often ?"[/SIZE]
In other words, will I have greater urges to CD if I spend more time and thoughts on CD?

There are 2 schools of thoughts.
School A : CD is sort of like an addiction. Someone even label it as a fetish. It is a manifestation of one's psychological issues and can be treated or altered.
School B : CD is a part of that person's disposition/personality and is ingrained. Therefore, there is no point in suppressing it.

If A is true, more crossdressing will lead to stronger urges to CD. Some might believe that if we allow our CD to persist, it will lead to transgenderism.

If B is true, urge to CD is unrelated to how often one crossdresses. Suppressing one's urge to CD will then be counter-productive and might lead to depression, anxiety and bad feelings.

We all know that transsexualism or homosexuality is an inborn part of a person. However, there is no medical consensus on what constitutes crossdressing. Psychiatrists are inclined to think its more of A but actual crossdressers mostly feel that their situation is more like B.

What is your thought on CD - A or B ?

[Melissa73]

interesting question!!!! is it an addiction???? or is it apart of who we are? idk, but as for me.....i have attempted to stop, most recently for 2 yrs. And my urges pushed me and grew and became very sexual dreams (usually me dressed up!) Now that im out, and dressed around the house the sex dreams have stopped! But my need to dress still grows. Sometimes, sitting around the house is not enough. I want to go out! But do i want to be a girl? NO! I just wanna dress and look girly. it makes me feel good and sexy inside.

melissa73

[noeleena]

Hi,

Heres a thought, & itll depend on wether dressing in different clothes has any bearing on any thing.
In our group of some 200 people about half are women ,

Now our men do dress in skirts & dress's of many different colours, now this is where its different none of the men wont to be women , okay, yet they dress similer to us just the fit / size is different,

Now of cause its not as is like here with dresser's or crossdresser's & with the frame of mind thats talked about here,

& the men are just real mens men so not a problem go back to our 1400 to 1700 & what did men wear. have a look at the dress style of that time,

...noeleena...

[ReineD]

I think it's more complex than just A & B, although if you look at it in a very general sense your division of the community is accurate. Some CDers do it for fetish while others experience a milder form of gender dysphoria, although you've left out a third important major category, which is the overlap between the two.

Does more CDing cause a greater need to CD? In some people I think it does for a period of time. On the other hand, in other people, NOT CDing causes huge urges to CD to the point where they can't stop thinking about it, regardless of whether it is a sexual fetish. It can become a mental obsession. Maybe sexual fetishes and mental obsessions are both different ramifications of the same, unfulfilled desire to dress.

But I think that if a not overly sexual CDer is in the fortunate position to take it as far as he'll want to, if he either lives alone or has a supportive wife and he is not feeling as if he *must* CD at every possible opportunity the minute the people in his life have their backs turned, then he will reach a plateau which will define for him his own, personal end point. I do not think that every CDer is on a short or a long road to transition.

[Rogina B]

There is no A or B type answer. It is an individual thing.Some of us were definitely born with the desire,while others were not.Suppressing it often causes a big meltdown eventually in some people.For others,it is just another item on their fetish list.

[WifeofWrenchette]

B - Suppressing one's urge to CD will then be counter-productive and might lead to depression, anxiety and bad feelings.

[Beverley Sims]

Starts off a bit of A and then progresses to B.
That is one school of thought.
I do like Reinee's insight into it as she has given more thought to it than I have.

[Jana]

Linda, one could argue the motions forever and not reach any meaningful conclusion. What matters is what YOU get out of your dressing, REGARDLESS of what other people think.

[Kate Simmons]

Crossdressing is an intrinsic need for many but if we address it properly, it can become a choice.

[kristinacd55]

Great post....my thoughts about in my case are when I was in the closet it was definitely an addiction/fetish. Now that I've been going out in public the last 2 years that has totally changed. I barely dress anymore at home and interacting with others LIVE just changes the whole lifestyle that I'm living now. It has become a way of life for me, and I don't fit it into either A or B really.

[missmars]

B. but urges to crossdress becom opportunity to like crossdressing. When I saw crossdressor in Television when I was in primary school It made me crossdresser.

[xdressed]

I agree it's not quite as simple as a and b, but B is pretty close for me.

[kimdl93]

I think its naive to suggest that there are only two possibilites. , I would submit that Psychiatrists are not inclined to think CDing is simply an addiction. Second, your dichotomy suggests that there are only two possibilites - an addictive behavior or an inborn aspect of human nature. I would submit that many, perhaps most, cross dressers manifest transgendered characteristics and have from early childhood. But I would also submit that the degree varies dramatically between individuals, so some individuals are comfortable with a limited expression - such as occassional dressing or underdressing. Others perhaps are more towards the Transsexual end of the spectrum and prefer presenting as a woman in much or most of their lives.

Fetish dressers often object to being lumped under the Transgender umbrella. That's fine with me. I view the term as a way of understanding human behavior, not as a lable.

As to the addiction analogy, many human behaviors, including cross dressing regardless of the underlying motivation, has the potential to become an obsession - particularly for people with a tendency towards addictive behavior. And if that obssessive behavior begins to crowd out other aspects of life, resulting in harm to personal relationships, reckless spending or other damaging behaviors, then it might be considered addictive behavior. The same might be true of gambling, drinking, or model train collecting.

However, becoming addicted to cross dressing does not "lead to transgenderism". I can dress in a gorilla suit, but ...even if I really get off on dressing like a gorilla, that will never make me a gorilla.

[linda.wai]

My experience is both A and B.
I was trying hard to suppress my CD urges for years and I needed to hide and CD every 8 or 9 months to release the built up tension. I also was obsessed about it when i don't CD (in private without anyone knowing) Then, I started having one week CD vacations alone when I live as a woman entirely and go out and interact with everybody. The urge to CD plateaued. I no longer feel the urge to CD. Sometimes, I feel nowadays that the hassle involved is not worth it and the urge dies down. I'm now unsure I still want to CD in the long run although I think about it every now and then still.

[stacycoral]

I personally feel like a T-girl, so it is both a and b for me, iknow i am more than a Cd but will not be a Transexal,so i a+b=C that's me, hugs

[Karren H]

So what expert in crossdressing said there were only 2 schools of thought?

[TeresaL]

As others have said, it is important that we are able to seek our own level. Otherwise, our desire will increase irregardless of whether this is on our fetish list or not. It's unhealthy for someone or something to impede our development. Our gender proclivity reaches to the bottom of our souls, as many have committed suicide in trying to work it out.

If crossdressers could be defined as transgender persons with less dysphoria than TS, then its origin is an inborn birth condition of the brain, as the rest of our LGBT are prone to submit. We just have varying levels of gender expression.

Rogina's reference to another item on the fetish list defines me starting at puberty, and continuing into adulthood until I decreed two things;

First, however silly, that my transgender image when dressed as Teresa demanded more respect than being a sex object. Secondly, that the list of props could be shifted to lingerie and apparel catalogs or girlie magazines. The difficult problem is that crossdressing is a 3D prop and easy to take advantage of. Whilst crossdressing isn't a choice, things that we do when in enfemme mode are.

However, using crossdressing as a fetish is indeed making use of a superior prop. Medications and aging take it's toll on the fetish side too.

Oh, I ascribe mostly, but not exclusively to "B."

[Rebecca_Annette]

I always Thought I was school B have a wonderful SO. REALLY wonderful.

If I lose her, perhaps school A will become true, because sometimes I think it is. I went for the counselling thing once, they said I was transgendered rather than just a crossdresser. So . . .

I don't know.

My SO makes me happy. If she wasn't here, perhaps . . .

I don't know.

Heck I'm getting mixed up between A & B!!

But I hope the girls here will follow what I mean?

[ClosetED]

I think you are trying to simplify why people crossdress. For a minority, they cross dress as a fetish for sexual gratification. For those, you might expected dressing would lead to sexual release, a reduced desire, and then a rebuilding of desire depending on libido and opportunity. For a few who feel they are women, then their natural goal is to become women and dressing in woman's clothing is just part of the normal part of a woman's life. But for most, I believe it is a based on that fact we are not 100% masculine and 0% feminine despite being 100% male. For a person who by disposition/personality is 90% masculine and 10% feminine, then crossdressing once a week may be their stable level. For someone who is 50/50, they may dress every day after work. For someone who is 10% masculine and 90% feminine, then living full time may be their level. As circumstances allow. If someone is suppressed from their desired level, then tension builds and the fantasy of what they desire may over-reach their disposition, leading to temporary over-reaction. For those who find acceptance, the amount of crossdressing is likely to exactly fit their amount of femininity. Does this fit in better with the member's self-assessment? This group is the best one to argue this out btter than any licensed psychiatrist.

[Dawn cd]

Addiction no, since that implies some kind of physical compulsion, but for some people crossdressing can become an obsession, in the sense that it's an activity that pushes all other activities out of the way. Obsessions can be unhealthy because they disorder our priorities. When we get into a "pink fog," we are in the grip of an obsession.

For genuine transexuals, however, crossdressing and other kinds of feminine behavior is not obsessive. It's a psychological imperative. One might call it a vocation—a calling—to be who they were meant to be.

[Foxglove]

School A : CD is sort of like an addiction. Someone even label it as a fetish. It is a manifestation of one's psychological issues and can be treated or altered.

It's the part in bold that I don't understand here. What sort of psychological issues are we talking about? Gender dysphoria or something else--e.g. feelings of insecurity, Oedipus complex or whatever. Because if it's something else, how would that lead someone to start CDing?

Annabelle

[Gillian Gigs]

Famous last words, " I am not addicted, I can stop anytime that I want". LOL

I believe it is possible that CD’ing could be addictive, but only under the right circumstances... For many of us our first times of masturbation involved dressing in some form of women’s clothing. The act of masturbation releases endorphins into the body, it has its effect, in that we desire to have the same feelings of well being again. Over the years of repeating this "well being exercise" it gets ingrained into us, our want, or need, for this sense of well being, which comes through sex, masturbating, and/or the dressing in the clothes. As the desire in one area decreases through age, are there increases in other area to offset the decreased change, and help maintain the feelings of well being? My experience leads me to believe this to be true, as well as the talk from others on how dressing is a great stress relief in their lives. If I get a boost of endorphins into my body while I wear my lingerie and skirt, it might be considered by some to be a cheap "high", so what! Then again what if it is only a well formed habit? In checking the dictionary, I found that the word habit, refers to something that is; settled or regular tendency or practise, practise that is hard to give up; Habit forming causing addiction.

So, is something that is habitual, something that will automatically lead to an addiction? CD’ing definitely seems to be something that is hard to give up, which is based on the number of comments that get posted, as well as my own experience. We all have habits, yet how many of them lead to any kind of addiction? We all have good habits that we could get compulsive about also. So, if I for example get a compulsion, as in irresistible urge, to eat some chocolate ice cream, am I addicted to it? Or, as what literally happened to me this morning, I had this urge to wear pantyhose, and was not settled until I dressed in a skirt and hose. So, what is the difference, other than the society that we live in which has set some standard in which we don’t seem to fit.

I am one of the fortunate ones that has an understanding and supportive wife. The only down side I see to this "habit" of mine is that I have to keep it from anyone who doesn't understand, or who is prejudice, through ignorance of why I do what I am doing. Unfortunately I, as well as many of us are doing little or nothing to change the ignorant. Mea Culpa

[ArleneRaquel]

I believe that most of us are predisposed to this life style, to varying degrees. I have had the urge since the age of 8, since 2002, after my wife died to has leaped to wear I dress nearly 24/7.

[LelaK]

Whether one calls it a fetish or an indelible personality feature, I desire to always retain my love of beauty and my love of trying to express beauty. I believe that's why I CD.

[AllyCDTV]

I think it is far more complex than it being between A or B. Either implies that the individual has no choice in the matter. I don't believe that is the case, at least not for everyone. In addition, the word "addiction" gets thrown around so much that the true meaning of the word has become lost.

In my case, in my latest crossdressing era, I decided to let things continue until I reached a plateau. That occurred about a year ago. Since then, I have noticed my interest in crossdressing decline. I have gone months with no interest in crossdressing and as time goes on, it becomes less and less desirable to crossdress. If given only 2 choices, perhaps a bit of B provided the spark and A fueled it for a while. Being that to me it is not a true addiction, A ran out of gas and B alone is not enough to sustain my interest at the level I once attained.