Experience...lets hear it (bi)

[busker]

Once we put a dress, by definition, we desire to be women

Heather, I'm not certain that one thing follows the other. I would say from a lot of reading here that probably a majority of cross dressers don't exactly know why they do this--there is NO original desire (if you accept them at their word), so the desire to BE a woman simply by the act of dressing cannot follow, anymore than someone putting a baseball hat on my head and by that action making me want to be Babe Ruth.
Those who say that dressing provides "stress relief" say nothing about being a woman. Those who say that dressing is a more tactile experience say nothing abut a desire to be a woman. Those who are "pleasure" dressers are certainly not claiming any female status--it is sexual.
There are some that do claim to be women in the wrong body, so then dressing would BE normal for them. Just my thoughts.

[Sue Too]

And I don't see the problem to admit at least to yourself that you are bisexual. It is not something to be ashamed of.

I totally agree.

[Dena]

I do fantasize about being with a guy.
But, I have never looked at a guy and thought "You're it!"
I'm just not attracted to guys.

[Tracii G]

For me its the personality of a person that draws me to them be it male or female.
My last guy encounter has turned into something way more than I ever expected.

[Lorileah]

Life is too short to limit your choices

[outhiking]

When I fantisize about a guy, I'm imagining myself as a complete woman, so it feels more or less hetrosexual. I don't really get anything out of fantisizing about myself as a guy with a guy, even when dressed.

[firststepnow_whynot]

me too... i know I am not gay or into guys... but when i am all dressed up, the idea of being with a guy is definitely exciting. But I have rationalized that to my desire to be a woman is so strong that my thoughts of being with a guy is a way to make me feel complete ... complete woman... confusing tho, and i have given up analyzing myself...

[flatlander_48]

me too... i know I am not gay or into guys... but when i am all dressed up, the idea of being with a guy is definitely exciting. But I have rationalized that to my desire to be a woman is so strong that my thoughts of being with a guy is a way to make me feel complete ... complete woman... confusing tho, and i have given up analyzing myself...

This is interesting. Those of us who are old enough to remember the beginnings of the Women's Movement will recall that one of the cornerstones was that a women didn't need a man in order to be complete. Fascinating...

[monalisa]

The post as always creates lots of feedback and opinions and it comes down to why do we have to label things or categorize from hetero, bi or gay. If you enjoy having sex while dressed with either sex it is up to you and your decision and shouldn't be judged or have to be labeled. I also have no interest in men except when dressed and then become curious or fantasize about how it would be like with another cd or a man. Having a few drinks and a little slow dancing and the urge to experiment might take hold. Often thought if you were blindfolded you might not know whether you are with a man or woman initially.

[flatlander_48]

The post as always creates lots of feedback and opinions and it comes down to why do we have to label things or categorize from hetero, bi or gay. If you enjoy having sex while dressed with either sex it is up to you and your decision and shouldn't be judged or have to be labeled. I also have no interest in men except when dressed and then become curious or fantasize about how it would be like with another cd or a man. Having a few drinks and a little slow dancing and the urge to experiment might take hold. Often thought if you were blindfolded you might not know whether you are with a man or woman initially.

OK, since you don't like labels, here is your homework assignment. In your message above, you used 8 descriptors for humans. Write your message WITHOUT those discriptors. Made up words do not count. Any words that you do use must be in Webster's online dictionary (www.m-w.com).

Thanks.

[Soriya]

OK, since you don't like labels, here is your homework assignment. In your message above, you used 8 descriptors for humans. Write your message WITHOUT those discriptors. Made up words do not count. Any words that you do use must be in Webster's online dictionary (www.m-w.com).

Thanks.

Was that really necessary? I mean no disrespect as that is not my intent to respond but your post seems to be loaded with sarcasm. She only stated she doesn't like labels. yea we need them in the society we live in but I think her point was directed more at how society uses labels as weapons.

If you were trying to be humorous, there is only one difference between Humor and Sarcasm, Sarcasm has a victim.

[Christinedreamer]

As I have mentioned before I have been very attracted to female impersonators or CDers who strived for a real, ladylike and definitely NOT campy or ****ty look. I have had a couple relationships that lasted for quite a while. I know I am not attractive in any way in female mode and only average when in DRAB. The first was way back in the early seventies and 'Sandy' was so ladylike and gentle it was amazing. I felt myself very strongly drawn to her but even when she was not in femme mode I still felt she was there just dressed a little differently.

I was drawn to her gentle personality and she was drawn by my voice. (I sing bass/baritone and have done voiceover work) I know that technically we had a gay relationship but I never felt as though I was with a man. Men do nothing for me at all. I still remember very fondly her soft hands and those long, REAL nails. (getting goosebumps just from the memory)

[Starr]

Well i am guess i am bi, but right now i love being a girl and being with a man.. it is a total different thing and love having someone else make decisions about things.. were to eat, etc... i love to kiss, and feel a man's hands rubbing on me.. i love do whatever i can to show him i want to please him like a girl... i take kind of a submissive or passive approach when with a man and just let things happen..

[flatlander_48]

Was that really necessary? I mean no disrespect as that is not my intent to respond but your post seems to be loaded with sarcasm. She only stated she doesn't like labels. yea we need them in the society we live in but I think her point was directed more at how society uses labels as weapons.

If you were trying to be humorous, there is only one difference between Humor and Sarcasm, Sarcasm has a victim.

You know that society at large often uses labels inappropriately and I know that, but it's funny how people use that as an excuse to absolve themselves of the whole notion. And, this is something that is quite prevalent here. Personally, I find it frustrating that it is so common. Further, it's sort of silly because that is the nature of language. If there were no labels, how could we ever refer to anything that is out of our range of vision and hearing? You've been here for a while, so I'm sure that you have seen people make these kinds of statements before. Anyway, it was intended to be thought-provoking and a possibly a challenge. Sarcasm is optional.

[ArleneRaquel]

Life is too short to limit your choices

Lori,
You are so right, but in my case I haven't been on a date with a GG since 2005 or thereabouts. We meet when I was in drab and we chatted, in a grocery store, well we finally went out, and I found her to be a terrible bigot, I won't go into details, and very ignorant. So while I agree with Lori 100% I guess that I've been limiting myself, but it is by choice.

[Buxom Fella]

I consider myself 'theoretically bi', as in my entire life, I've only actually become physically intimate with a guy ONCE, and have otherwise been (very very!) attracted and intimate with women. I'm married, so it's not really an issue (I'm not going to cheat with another woman, so why would I cheat with a guy?), but lately I have come to accept that I just sort of see EVERYONE as awesome and cool and potentially sexy, and I've been happier since then.

[Sierra228]

I had an date experience once. It is a very long story, but I feel as though I may have lost a really special experience because I was to afraid to embrace the uniqueness of the moment. It is a regret I have

[StarrOfDelite]

Sorry, but I must correct this statement. No, "many" do not. "Some" crossdressers do. Those crossdressers that do are gay or bi. There is no such thing as being a straight crossdresser AND wanting to be with men sexually or romantically. At best, it is an excuse used by those who do not want to admit that they are really gay or bi.

There are no "straight crossdressers" on this forum. If a genetically male person crossdresses and posts on a public forum devoted to transgenderism with an assumed woman's name, then it is about 99% certain that she is not"straight."

[Lorileah]

Star, that may be your opinion but it isn't correct based on what you say. Just because someone cross dresses or uses a fem name (and some here don't even do that), does not mean they are not straight....

[PaulaQ]

Yes, I agree with Lorileah. I may not be sure of much. (Is my identity male? Is it female? Some of both? How much of each? No clue.) But I am pretty sure I'm straight. I mean, I don't care if I'm not - I don't have a problem with people who are gay or bisexual - I think it is wonderful that people can find love. But best I can tell, I'm mostly pretty straight. I've thought about it a lot. It's hard not to when you begin to wonder about your gender identity. But I am really, really, really attracted to women, and I'm just not to men. Seeing a really pretty woman makes my brain turn to jello sometimes. Seeing a very handsome guy is just like "hey dude, how's it going?" No big deal.

Of course this is confusing, because I guess if I'm really a girl, then I'm not straight - I'm a lesbian.

This is why I don't really like labels like "gay" or "straight" so much, because they tend to be gender relative, and for some of us, that is ambiguous. (I'm literally not sure what you'd consider someone who was bigender, but only preferred one sex.) Anyway, I like girls. Some of us like boys, that's OK too. Some of us love the person first, and worry about their gender later, or not at all. And that's OK by me as well.

[reb.femme]

.........Had a fabulous night out, treated to drinks and a meal.

Beth,

You sound like my wife!


Rebecca

[reb.femme]

There are no "straight crossdressers" on this forum. If a genetically male person crossdresses and posts on a public forum devoted to transgenderism with an assumed woman's name, then it is about 99% certain that she is not"straight."

Puts me in the 1% then....phew!

[TeresaCD]

Star, that may be your opinion but it isn't correct based on what you say. Just because someone cross dresses or uses a fem name (and some here don't even do that), does not mean they are not straight....

Me too! One of the things I've been able to accept is that it's ok to cross dress, and be attracted to just women
For a long time I thought that cross dressing = bi/gay, now I know it doesn't have to be this way.
One benefit of knowing that we are all different..

[Marleena]

There are no "straight crossdressers" on this forum. If a genetically male person crossdresses and posts on a public forum devoted to transgenderism with an assumed woman's name, then it is about 99% certain that she is not"straight."

Oh brother.. nice thing to say on a forum where wives are looking for answers. Wrong answer.

[Jenniferathome]

There are no "straight crossdressers" on this forum. If a genetically male person crossdresses and posts on a public forum devoted to transgenderism with an assumed woman's name, then it is about 99% certain that she is not"straight."

There are Star. I am one of them. And there are many, many more. Cross dressing and heterosexuality go together like jam and bread