I have spoken in the past about how accepting my wife is of my little "hobby". I told her about it about 6 months into our relationship, and now 12 years later (6 married) we are still going strong. I have been going out on my own for years, without hair and makeup, and usually to a mall. About 6 months ago, she found a local weekly party for me to attend, in which she can doll me up and send me on my way, while she stays home with the kids. I want her to come with me, and she wants to come out as well, however, this is where I have an issue. I do go the weekly party, bc my wife likes to hear about the goings on and all that, but there are nights where it is just epically boring. Maybe 6 other girls, in a dark creepy bar. She has suggested a swingers club, my weekly bar, and a few other places she thinks I will be comfortable in. However, I don't think I would be comfortable with her at these places because it isn't a place we would go otherwise. I have gone alone to Mohegan Sun, Foxwoods, movies etc without encountering any problems, and would much prefer to take her "mainstream" than a creepy place with some overly closeted girls that sometimes make the room awkward. I do pass when dolled up, and she doesn't particularly care about being outed, as I don't either. I would much rather go to either the casinos or broadway or a museum, but she is concerned about my safety. How can I quell her fears? I know she would much rather go to a "mainstream" place as well, but the thought of me being injured has her more than freaked out,. We have gone out to dinner and casino on Halloween, but that is it.
As an aside, she asked me what my ideal day would be about 8 months ago, and I mentioned museum, train ride into the city, dinner, etc, and she now wants to do it, but as I said, she is freaking herself out. Do I take her to the seedy bar, and hope its a good night, or go to a swingers club on Bi night (the only night they allow tg) or just make plans myself and take her where I want?