(It's a smoking fetish Tiff, Just like I have a Fully Fashioned nylon stocking, Latex, and shoe fetish...
Unfortunately my brother died at 50 Kim...would that he could have lived longer to see his grandchildren. This was 8 years ago or so. He was a heavy smoker and developed a terrible racking caugh...We kept telling him...GO SEE A DOCTOR..(Notice we didn't rag on him about his smoking, which we did often enough in the past)..his answer was always the same. "I'm working too hard to go see a doctor..I don't have the time.."
Weli, long story short he collapsed at work one day. His boss thought he was drunk, but my brother seldom drank...he was incoherent, couldn't stand, could hardly breathe, so the ambulance came and took him away..I got the bad news call from my NY Uncle and had to sit down...50? BRAIN cancer at 50? Our family has NO history of any kind of cancer...
He had developed lung cancer, but worse, it had mestastacized from his lungs to his brain. The cancer had traveled up his spinal column..
.I had never heard of that, but that's what happened. Inoperable. Nothing anyone could do for him. He had so many cancer spots in his brain that if they could have operated, one would scarcely know where to begin.
All from smoking. I started in my mid-late teens 16-17 yo or so and stopped around 20yo. But I was never a heavy smoker. I liked Newport menthols in the Brooklyn NY snow with a nice slice of piping hot Sicialian square pizza waiting for the bus to HS/College; Marlboro Reds in the Brooklyn summer, then I got into Luck Strike non-filtered for a while, say 20 yo to 24yo then just decided to quit. Cold Turkey.
Living in Big Bear Lake CA with my wife and dog, years later, kids were grown up and on their own, I started smoking Cigarello's in the snow you know, but that lasted less than 1 yr and 6 months and it was the end of smoking for me.
PLUS, my medical insurance and more importantly, death benefits for my kids and wife would be not only drastically higher in annual cost, but open to denial if I smoked, denied it on my insurance papers, and left my family with zero.
So these are other things to consider post-haste.
Fetish smoking is probably no worse than a bit O' the red (wine) or Spirits (hard alchohol) as long as it's in moderation. The thing to do is get regualr check-ups and do what your doctor advises if something untoward or alarming crops up...but we're all grown-ass men on here, so WE decide what's good or not good for us.
I see no harm in fetish smoking as long as no harm comes healthwise to YOU Tiff...
My grandfather smoked like a fiend...85+ years, Harsh Russian tobacco cigs, pipe, cigar, snuff...and he died from a fall @ 98. Cleaning grandma's windows! Up on a ladder, fell, broke his hip, got pnemonia of the bone. His autopsy? Lungs clear as a bell!!!