I'm surprised that no one has mentioned that he's probably projecting. Likely a frustrated cross dresser himself trapped in a society that is very intolerant.Originally Posted by CassandraSmith
I'm surprised that no one has mentioned that he's probably projecting. Likely a frustrated cross dresser himself trapped in a society that is very intolerant.
I suppose that this could be a bit of "blame the victim," but why are you putting yourself out there on Facebook? It's like walking into a 1%er biker bar dressed. Yes, you might get away with it, but chances are someone will express their own lack of male self-confidence through words or violence.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
once you open the door on the net it so hard to keep scum out
WHEN IN STRESS WEAR A DRESS
BE HAPPY WITH YOURSELF IT ALL YOU GOT
As bigoted as Western culture is sometimes against sexual and gender diversity, you know that in certain parts of the world it is even worse, especially in the Middle East. I don't know if they will ever come to tolerate gender and sexual variance.
Ten years ago, you would not have had an issue if your webpages only reached people who lived if not in accepting cultures, then at least tolerating societies. But, everything that you post now goes all over the world, even to the countries that still severely punish homosexuality and cross-gender expression.
So until the rest of the world catches up to the somewhat/semi accepting attitudes of India and the West, don't be surprised if you get some hateful comments from people who live in other countries. Like others have said, just blow them off. They're influenced by a stricter religion than yours is, perhaps.
You might want to disallow all comments to your pages, except your friends? Also, be careful especially now with all the facial recognition software. You would not want a hater to track down your identity and real location based on pics of your face.
Reine
*Sigh*
I guess its somewhat close to be human nature too be to full of hate, fearing what you do not understand or cannot explain. That would explain a history full of war and senseless homicides.
Why degrade ourselves to this level? Although, I'm not a Christian, but I do agree with returning hate with love. Not the easiest way out, but the objective of it does bring peace to your heart. Makes you a much better person.
=^o^=
Meghana, let me ask u something?
Would u have preferred it if he had hit on u instead? Maybe using sexy, dirty language and photos? U may have been MORE offended/bothered and may not have been able get rid of him without banning him!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
Yes, but, Eryn, we could ask this question in other ways. E.g., why do I want to go into town dressed? It's because I want to live my life. Is it my fault if I run into someone who doesn't like it?
Or why would a GG post on Facebook? Chances are some jerk somewhere will make some nasty comments. She's just living her life.
The way I see it, everybody, no matter who they are, gives a jerk 1000 opportunities every day to be a jerk. He's not forced to avail of them.
Annabelle
Hey friends..Good to know that i'm being loved here very much. Thanks for all the advice and your point of views..
I certainly don't want guys hitting on me..if he doesn't like what i'm doing..he should've just simply ignored me...instead of venting out his extremist and prejudiced rant against me.You just can't hate a person who doesn't even know you...it's very much irrational. I didn't want to mention the religion part..since it came out...i agree,most of them are tend to be unreasonable,inconsiderate and narrow-minded in their views. I haven't got anything against them and i even got some muslim CD friends.
As for FB, i put myself up there to share my creative side and catch up with some like-minded people. I normally keep everything to my friends..once in a while i make a few public posts for the sake of my followers (..most of them are harmless). I may have to think about altering the settings.
P.S. If it's not for the kinda language that's being used..i wouldn't have bothered too much. I'm very much sensitive person even in real life. Somethings i can't get out my head easily..especially when you're being hated for something that you're not confident of.
Unfortunately things like Facebook you are left open to all and sundry including people who do not give a monkey's about others feelings.
Maria
Maybe there's a positive side to this. You have chosen not to hide, but to put yourself out there; and now, you've had your first "hater." It was a given, a consequence of putting yourself out there, that it would happen eventually. But now it has. You've got one under your belt. The next one will be easier, and the one after that easier.
Ali Edwards
Transgender Science ~ Blogging with WrodPress ~ Tweeting on Twitter
"I am half-sick of shadows," said / The Lady of Shalott.
Meghana - I am sorry to hear about what happened to you. The comment came from a a man whose heritage and culture is to despise and use women - a a culture, which as also (sadly) prevalent in your own country, as witness the recent events in New Delhi. Having lived in the most conservative country in the Middle East for 12 years or so, I am under no illusions about the homocentric attitudes of that part of the world. I have many enlightened Muslim friends, but sadly, their views are much in the minority
You portray yourself as a woman, and frankly, it is almost inevitable that you will attract such medieval attitudes and comments. There is little you can do about it, except to rise above it, and I wish you the strength and courage to do just that.
Don't give up, and don't give in.
Hugs, Amanda.
If you always do what you always did, you'll always get what you always got!
I've had all sorts of hate mail, but never about crossdressing. Most of it was about things so silly you'd wonder why anyone would care about them in the first place. Just ignore it. It's not worth worrying about.
Yes, it's important to note that every rule has its exceptions. While Muslims in general tend to be LGBT-hostile, there are those that are not, and, in fact, those that are CDs themselves. (And for those sisters I am deeply concerned...they have an even harder row to hoe than we do.)
There's a saying that's frequently used online these days..."Haters gonna hate." It's a reflection of the fact that some people are just going to lash out at anything they find distasteful, without regard to the consequences of their words. So just remember that these poor misguided souls exist, and they hurl their hateful words against you because that's what they do, and that's all they do. Spare them some pity if you must, but don't fret over what they say. Non illegitimi carborundum!
- Amy
Amy Gale Ruth Bowersox (nee Tapie) - "Be who you are, and be it in style!"
Member, Board of Trustees, Gender Identity Center of Colorado
aka Amelia Storm - Ms. Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2018-2019, Miss Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2015-2016
I agree with Tamara. Maybe you have to change your FB settings.
Rachelf
The difference is, if I go out dressed I have reasonable control over where I go and therefore the type of people I encounter. I don't expose myself to undue danger by wandering at random.
If you make yourself public on FB you're inviting every whacko in the world to take a shot at you, with perfect anonymity. That removes any inhibition that they might have had and lets them be as nasty as they please.
Smart GGs, and I have a few in my immediate family, limit their facebook activity to close friends and family. Just because the capability exists to advertise ourselves like Angelyne doesn't mean we have to use it.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
Well, I didn't want to go all psychological but you're dead on. In fact, I'm pretty much convinced he either has a fixation on ******** or he wants to be one of us bad. His hate is almost certainly inwardly directed. Imagine the pain he must be in and the inner turmoil. I'm not foolish enough to put myself into his path but this person is probably miserable on every level. I wish I could help actually.
There's a bigger lesson here also and that is that most of the time when strangers (and even sometimes people close to us) do and say stuff, it has almost nothing to do with us personally (I know that's not flattering but it's almost always true).
Last edited by CassandraSmith; 01-24-2013 at 12:17 PM.
I always hesitate to go down this road. It's an easy explanation--and certainly correct in some cases. But I don't automatically assume that it's always true, or even true most of the time. There are people possessed of an honest sort of bigotry, if you want to call it that. They have no ulterior motives for their hatred. They hate simply because that's the sort of thing they do.
Annabelle
I will heed your words of wisdom here.
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