going out

[slamddoger]

when we go out dress as women do we really pass as women

[Melissa73]

i dont go out much, and considering i havent a wig yet, i have to say no, i dont pass! i am most definitely a guy in womens clothing

melissa

[ArleneRaquel]

The percent of times that I pass are in the single digits, but that doesn't bother me, I just want to live as I want to live and do no harm to others.

[docrobbysherry]

What's this, "We", kimosabe?

I MAY have passed one evening in my 15+ years of dressing with a handfull of folks. The rest of my out time has been, not a chance in H, baby!

[prene]

sometimes, but that is only from behind and if I do not talk.

I hate it I am so tall 5-11 1/2" and do have thunder thighs ...

But from a far I hope i do.

[Beverley Sims]

The short answer, not always.
The long answer, not always, but a little careful preparation as far as makeup, appropriate clothing and deportment helps a lot.
You do have to do your homework to pass successfully.

[Angie G]

Not me hun.
Angie

[Tammy Nowakowski]

i sure do not pass at this time

[Mikkigurll]

I used to, but, not anymore.

[Angela Campbell]

Not sure. I have gone to shops in the mall at the Christmas rush in Dec. and to crowded restaurants on a Friday night. Gone out quite a few times. I have never even got a strange look from others. Never a comment, no indication at all that anyone thinks anything odd about me. I think most do not really look close enough, or if they do wonder it doesn't matter much to them.I have even had a man open a door for me.

[Melissa Rose]

Passing? What is that? There is as many definitions of passing as there are shades of MAC eye shadow.

I hate it when someone asks me "Do I pass" or "How well do I pass". It is analogous to the infamous "Does my butt look fat in these pants". I really cringe at the latter form of the passing question. It is not a curve, either you pass completely or you do not. It is like saying "I'm full time except for at work" or "How dead is the patient?". Egads.

A fair number of cross dressers would pass the "next car over" test. This is being read by someone glancing over from the car in the next lane at a stop light.
A very small number would pass the "across the table" test. This is being read by someone sitting across from you at a typical restaurant table. The number plummets to a miniscule number if you have to interact with the other person.
Unfortunately, a small number fail the "across the intersection at dusk" test. Some cross dressers scream "male" no matter the circumstances.

When in public, passing is about your entire presentation and not only about how you look. The absence of reactions, stares, comments or other signals is not proof of passing. Nor is the perception of being treated as a woman. Our confirmational bias blinds us to both sides of passing. The bottom line is very, very few cross dressers pass when out and interacting with the public.

[NV Susan]

I have passed at times when out and about. When out en femme it's usually for my pleasure....if I pass, well that just an added bonus!

[I Am Paula]

I have the acceptance of my peers, good friends, and always try to look my best. I'm treated as a woman and an equal by all. I know I don't pass, and I don't care- Celeste

[Starr]

In a busy store, unless they look me straight in the face, at a glance most people will see me as female. If they want to interact or get a close look they will see i am male. First and foremost, be your self, get over being afraid and hold you head high, smile and go about your business as if you belong there the way you are.. because you do. One of the most disarming things i can do when read by someone is smile and or wink. My hair is long, wear clothes that fit the time of day and activitiy i am doing as well as carring myself in a fem matter. Unless it is a guy who wants to hit on you, most people will look at you and see what they think they should see. Then they go on about their business, think about it, when you go in a store and see what appears to be a man in a suit looking at ties do you take another look to see for sure it is a man??? NO you go on about your business. People do not normally see as much as most CD's give them credit for.

[Leah Lynn]

Maybe twice, in bars full of drunken farmers. Once danced with one, then left because he was "in love"???, and another time at a Halloween party at a bar. At least three of my fellow workers didn't figure it out until I spoke to them. Of course, they had been drinking for some time before I arrived. Normally, I'm out for my own pleasure, not to win the Miss America pageant.

[RenneB]

I'm with Melissa on this one. It took me a while to realize that the only thing I need to pass is the front door. Heading out and about is 90% 'tude and 10% fashion/looks/makeup/hair... I spent way too much time worrying how I would be perceived until I was able to develop the IDC 'tude.

For me, it took a whole lot of baby steps, but once you've got it, no one can take it away....

Besides, even on my worst hair days, I still 'pass' better that about half of the sweatsuited GGs in wally world.

Renne.....

[AimeeG]

I'm with Melissa on this one. It took me a while to realize that the only thing I need to pass is the front door. Heading out and about is 90% 'tude and 10% fashion/looks/makeup/hair... I spent way too much time worrying how I would be perceived until I was able to develop the IDC 'tude.

For me, it took a whole lot of baby steps, but once you've got it, no one can take it away....

Besides, even on my worst hair days, I still 'pass' better that about half of the sweatsuited GGs in wally world.

Renne.....

Absolutely true! Not worried about passing even though some people believe I do/can. I went it this weekend to the mall in all cloths designed and advertised for women, shaved my face like I would for work, wore no make-up, medium heels, painted nails and had a great time. I talked to more SA than ever and even talked to every SA in the Coach store...and got compliments on the shoes and my nails.

[Dannigirl]

Nope, but don't care all that much.

[Diversity]

I have not gone out because I don't have the confidence to do so. I don't have a wig and I don't know how to put on makeup. So I am a man in women's clothing, is all I am at present. I am, however, getting up the courage to try to walk around the block at night, after everyone has gone to sleep....
Di

[lingerieLiz]

Very few pass with any scrutiny. When I was young I could pass without too much scrutiny, but age long ago caused that to become imposable.

[Lynn Marie]

Funny thing is I really have no idea whether I'm passing or not. I don't look for reactions in others. It's an incredibly dangerous thing to do. How do you interpret other people's looks? I'm tall, wear heels, am fairly slim, have confidence, and try to look as classy as possible. I often get nice compliments and on occasion I get to hear a pickup line. I'm just not "that kind of girl", but who knows?

[AshleeM]

Don't worry about it, beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You can go out in male mode and have people criticize you just as easy as you could in girlie mode. There are always going to be people who want to bring you down to there level of misery.

[Cheryl T]

Few of us have the characteristics that would allow us to truly "pass".
For me it's about confidence, presenting a good image and just being me. I feel that by doing that I will be accepted for who I am and not what I'm doing and that is all I seek.

[crusadergirl]

I pass out sometimes but for the most part i do not pass

[Rachael Jones]

No. Just no. I don't pass, don't ever expect to - ironically, in that lies the challenge to transform myself from dude in dress to somebody else. Too much work to pass, personally. I'm just enjoying the femme side when i can.

Because of this, I would never leave the house dressed up..