I wonder how many of “us” there are? The ones who at a young age knew they were in the wrong body but have learned to “live” with it?
I have picked a point on the spectrum for me. I have made my excuses and alibis on it. I have convinced myself that the reasons are valid. And I am happy with me…sort of ...kind of…mostly.
Certain things in life recently have stirred the pot so to speak. I never thought that I would be interested in anyone again, romantically. In fact, I fought against it, enjoying my new found freedom. But this is why I never say never and always avoid always. And this new “thing” in my life has me wishing again. It brings up memories of when I was young and confused (as compared to being old now and confused). Why didn’t I get what others had (yes read girls…I could not have cared less about the cars or whatever the boys had)? The same question now comes up again. Then logic kicks in and I ask, would that make a difference to him? He likes me as is, so would changing things make it better…or worse?
This is not meant to be a thread to argue CD vs TS vs surgical TS. I know (yeah right) that I will not progress to surgery. Hormones are always in the realm of possibility. But this relationship has me all confused again. It also is not the place to argue sexuality or orientation (that has been beaten to death and I know what mine is…)
So I ask, how many of us have learned to live with who we are even though we know it isn’t “who” we are? I am placing this in the MtF section because even though it addresses TS, I think there are some CDs (labels labels labels) who are in the “I have learned to live with it” camp. So anyone can chime in.
