I was checking out this forum and my wife caught me. She asked what the hell I was doing on a Cross Dressing forum and I just told her nothing. She was getting frisky after and that was the end of it. I don't know why I didn't just own up. I think the only reason was that our 4 year old son was right there.
Hi Gina, You know what you have to do now.
Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......
I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !
If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.
Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!
Hard to make those split second decisions.For your sons sake I'd say you did the right thing.You can always bring it up to your wife in private later on.
Agreed.Originally Posted by BLUE ORCHID
The wife now has a data point. Better to Come Out rather than Be Outed...
I think she has it figured out. Now you are just lying to her face.
I agree with Flatlander. You also have a good lead-in:
"The other night I really wanted to talk to you about the website I was viewing, but with little [name] there I couldn't. It's been bothering me ever since. Could we talk now?"
Don't interpret the friskiness as interest in the idea - she might now be worried that she has to rekindle your interest in HER. Maybe she wants to prove to herself you're not gay, whatever. You have an issue that needs sorting, and you both know it now. Just my thoughts, from a girl who was outed in the same way (read my first posts on this forum). Best luck, MK
God gave women intuition and femininity. Used properly, the combination easily jumbles the brain of any man I've ever met. Farrah Fawcett
The longer you leave it, the harder it is.
It is impossible in front of a 4 yo, definitely.
Good to arrange a time when you both have freedom to express what's going on.
I was always afraid (still am a bit) that it would be too much for my wife to take.
Oh boy...here we go.
Your 4 year old will probably know nothing, it's just a computer screen. Your wife might have some set ideas already.
Show your devotion to her, and just say you like womens' clothes.
Smoking kills 5.4 people a year world wide, crossdressing kills zero.
I'm sure I am no help.
Just tell her. Maybe she will accept. Maybe not. But this is an opportunity to become closer. Bare your sole. Take a risk. Be intimate. Good luck
Last edited by heatherdress; 04-08-2013 at 12:41 PM. Reason: Simplify
Gina, I agree with your decision not to disclose in front of your son, but your DSW now knows something is going on. Better sooner than later.
I think your wife has a fair idea now ,so go for it have the chat the longer you leave it the more the lies stack up , at least having the chat now there is a chance she will be fine about it .
I imagine that she may want to see what you've doing on CD.com.Be ready for it.
I'm no expert, but I would have thought that smoking kills more people than that.
Ameli
And I'll bet that crossdressing kills at least one or two. Heel stuck in train track, corset too tight, etc.
"Don't hate me just for wanting to feel beautiful."
As others have said, now is the time to own up to this and just tell her. If she didn't know she probably has some questions/doubts now. Better for your whole relationship to clear things up and move forward.
I could see this happening too. Its going to be better to come clean about this side of yourself.
Last edited by Launa; 04-08-2013 at 07:56 AM.
Opportunity missed, hopefully another, better time will present itself. The deception of your wife may be part of the excitement of dressing, but your secret life causes a certain loss of intimacy with your wife, and you'll eventually get caught. To me, that's a high cost and a scary proposition at best. You might want to get prepared.
Lynn Marie
Click here to see me on Flickr
I think that was an opportunity lost.
My wife says I should only post one message a day.
Why do you talk to girls that are prettier than you anyway?
Is another question.
My answer is that they all have creative minds,and I learn something new every day.
I would introduce your wife to the jokes section first, and then move her on to more risque topics such as the lounge and software problems.
Do not under any circumstances show her the photo section there are too many attractive girls there.
Nathalie, you are telling me smoking isn't bad for you after all?
Last edited by Beverley Sims; 04-08-2013 at 08:32 AM.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
I agree that it was best not to say anything in front of your 4 year old son, but you need to come clean with your wife, the sooner the better.
Before that instant you had slight glimmer of a chance to win the argument that not telling her your secret wasn't the same as lying..... but now your toast..... good luck when she finds out......
Deny all, say it was a pop-up that wouldn't close, hide, ect. ect. or just say I like your clothes can I wear 'em too?........................Debra
Gina,
I would advise you to carefully think this situation through before you talk to your wife--but talk to her soon. She's probably generating a hundred images in her mind right now.
I made every mistake in the book with my wife, starting with hiding my crossdressing from her, and it has cost me dearly. The honesty issue is certainly important, but you need to realize how scary this is going to be for her. If you put herself in her shoes first (not literally! Another mistake I made!), and then talk with her from that perspective, that will help a lot. I also recommend that you apologize for hiding this from her. Explain why you did it. (In my case, this came over me gradually after we were married. If that's true for you, let her know that.)
IMHO, the worst mistake you can make is to approach this from your point of view--what you want and need. Right now, this is about what she wants and needs. Answer her questions honestly, reassure her. Wives have all sorts of fears (Are you gay? Are you going to transition? Do you think you're prettier than me when your dressed like a woman? What if our son finds out? Our friends?)
She's going to need time to absorb all of this, so go slow!
Best of luck!
--Emeraude
Oh come on! Are you trolling us? If not, the secret is out, she's just waiting for you to tell her. If I'm wrong, and she still believes you, I'd say you're trying to get found out to "force" yourself into the confession. Don't do that, pick a time and try and exercise some control of the conversation.
"Normal is what you get when you average out the weirdness that everybody has." Quote from my SO
Normal is a setting on a washing machine, or another word for average.
The fact that I wear a skirt as a male should not be taken as a comment on what you do, or do not wear, or how you wear it.
@GinaM - what is it that stops you from telling her? Why do you feel you can't? What is it you are afraid of?
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