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Thread: A couple of firsts for me today

  1. #1
    Senior Member Read only Allison Chaynes's Avatar
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    A couple of firsts for me today

    Today I was cleaning out my garage and wearing a pair of denim capris. I wasn't even consciously thinking about the fact that the neighbors might see me, and that exact thing happened. I didn't see or hear any weird response but the lady two doors down just waved. Then my wife's business partner showed up to pick up some things my wife asked her to get. I had no idea she was coming. Again, forgot I was wearing the capris and let her in. She commented on how comfortable they looked and how she didn't know they made them for guys... and strangely, knowing she is not one of those who would be accepting, it didn't bother me that she knows. I even went and checked the mail for the first time in partial female attire. This may not seem like a big deal but I'm in the Bible Belt and it's not exactly the bastion of acceptance.

  2. #2
    New Member Samantha45's Avatar
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    Congrats Allison! Just goes to show most people really don't care. They have their own concerns, just like you have yours.
    Last edited by Lorileah; 05-08-2013 at 11:52 PM. Reason: no need to quote the whole post directly above yours

  3. #3
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    Every perception is shaped by context. Cleaning out the garage seems a guy thing, and capris probably don't look all that out of place in at setting. Now, if your added make up, breast forms, a wig, etc, it might be a different matter.

  4. #4
    Gold Member Cynthia Anne's Avatar
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    Those baby steps add up! Keep taking them and see where they lead you to!
    If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:

  5. #5
    Aspiring Member marny's Avatar
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    first it is checking the mail. then it is walking the dog. before you know it,all your neighbors just wave and say hi and you feel great. voice of experience here. you will get comfortable in your girl skin
    regent,

  6. #6
    One Nerdy Bitch CarmenSkye's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cynthia Anne View Post
    Those baby steps add up! Keep taking them and see where they lead you to!
    Exactly what I was going to say.

    Although are you open to your wife? Her business partner might expose your secret!
    Done crying.

  7. #7
    Silver Member Rogina B's Avatar
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    Carmen,What difference does it really make? There aren't any mobs with torches and forks outside and Miley Cyrus is kissing girls and stripping...So what if the business partner finds her "strange" for her outfit!

  8. #8
    Senior Member MissTee's Avatar
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    Allison,

    Lived almost all of my life in the South. We are notorious for "round about" speak. Translated then, the phrase, " . . . didn't know they made them for guys" really means, "OMG, you're wearing girl clothes!" If you can handle the ensuing gossip and potential outing to more people it should be no problem. Hugs.

  9. #9
    One Nerdy Bitch CarmenSkye's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rogina B View Post
    Carmen,What difference does it really make? There aren't any mobs with torches and forks outside and Miley Cyrus is kissing girls and stripping...So what if the business partner finds her "strange" for her outfit!
    I couldn't care less about the business partner. I was talking about Allison's wife. If she doesn't know about Allison, and she hears it from her business partner first, there could be an issue.
    Done crying.

  10. #10
    Senior Member Read only Allison Chaynes's Avatar
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    Hi Carmen, yes my wife does know, and is trying to be supportive. As one of the GGs has posted, there is a spectrum of one day, she's loving it and the next hating it, and you never know which day it will be. But, I will say there are more days of either loving or tolerating it lately than the others. She and her business partner did a Relay for Life (boobie cancer) event and I volunteered to join the Womanless Beauty Review about four years ago to help raise money, so her pal has seen me the one time I fully CD'd in public and even commented to the wife afterward that I looked way too comfortable in that dress. Still she does not know it's a regular thing for me.

    Well, an additional quick update: apparently my next door neighbor saw me not only yesterday, but also a few weeks back when I was in my backyard wearing a dress. So much for my backyard being private on three sides. Might not seem like an issue, but she is the mother of a family of dissidents from a certain Middle Eastern country that the US has not gotten along with since that nation's people stormed our embassy years ago. She was mowing her yard at 5:30 this morning > and as I was about to leave the house, she stopped mowing long enough to come ask why I wore a woman's dress. I told her I don't expect her to understand it, but I wear whatever is comfortable for me. She looked at me funny so I asked her if she was forced to wear the hijab in her old country. I told her just as she is more comfortable in the pants that she was wearing this morning, it's the same with dresses for me. I think I got her thinking...
    Last edited by Lorileah; 05-09-2013 at 10:56 AM.

  11. #11
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    I agree with where you are Allison.
    A little bit at a time works wonders.
    I introduced jeans slowly to my repertoire some time ago and it eventually was no big deal any more.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  12. #12
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    Hi Allison, As long as you were cleaning the garage in a matter of fact way I'm going to bet that you might have projected a sort of confidence and normalcy about yourself that any neighbor would possibly think nothing of it. I've seen typical guys wearing shorts or shirts that I thought were a bit feminine. Casual wear can be taken in any way.

    Funny story---Last summer I had an OOPS! moment. I was inside wearing denim capris, t-shirt, and my pink flip-flops. My mother-in-law stopped by and was sitting with my wife on the deck. It's so natural for me that I walked straight out onto the deck to say "Hi." We all spoke for about 10 minutes. Then my thinking was, "oh s***!" I went back in the house and after the m-i-l left I apologized to my wife. The wife said, "What's done is done."

    Then a month ago my sister-in-law told me their whole family knew all about me maybe 20 years ago! My wife was just as shocked. Hey, at least we have some good stories to tell!

    That was a nice PM with you Allison!

    Cheryl

  13. #13
    Member renaej7's Avatar
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    Congrats on your firsts today! One thing I have learned is that people are only uncomfortable if you are. Trust me...I understand how it is in the Bible Belt.
    be sweet for me

    -Renae

  14. #14
    Junior Member PattiAllison's Avatar
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    I have gradually developed a 'who cares' attitude about having the neighbors seeing me dressed as Patti. There are a few of them that I would prefer not to have any interaction with, but as for most of them, I would enjoy speaking with while I am dressed. I keep reminding myself that how I dress is my business and nobody else's.

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