For you late bloomers, what precipitated your cross dressing!

[Dianne S]

I have liked to crossdress since I was very young. Didn't actually go out dressed until I was in my twenties. I haven't gone out dressed in the last 17 years since our first child was born, and hadn't actually done much "full" dressing until about six months ago. Now, for some reason, the urge has come back very strongly.

I don't know what precipitated it. I think maybe the light at the end of the tunnel WRT raising kids... I can see that I'll have time in the coming years to indulge and I just can't wait.

[iGenny]

When I started (I’m 56, it was a year ago) it was almost like a switch was flipped. The idea to dress had never entered my head until then. My wife (same woman for almost half my life) had always called my underwear “panties” and I always corrected her.

Well, one morning we were fighting and she made a remark about not getting my panties in a bunch. I thought to myself, “OK, I give up” and put on a pair of hers. Hmmm … not bad, not sexy (white granny panties), not snug at all, but not bad. My plan was to show her that I’m getting HER panties in a bunch, but decided against it and put them back and got dressed as usual. The concept had been introduced, however, and the next time she was in the shower, I donned what she had worn the day before. Everything. Damn, I looked good. It felt good. I got undressed and re-dressed using my own male clothes. The rest, as they say ….

I’ve always had a balance of masculine and feminine traits (think football and Broadway, ‘Dancing with the Stars’ and ‘Die Hard’). Trying to work things out in my brain, all I can think of is that over the last 25+ years, I’ve had the pressure of being the husband and the dad and the provider and the handyman (etc) that dressing has been like a safety valve.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go plan and prep tomorrow night’s dinner, take out the garbage, and fix the ceiling fan.

[Jaymees22]

Hi, I had tried crossdressing as a teenager and didn't resume until last year, a fifty year break. No trauma just some extra time on my hands after I retired. I just got the urge and was hoping for something sexual to happen, it didn't, just a great sense of relief. Jaymee

[MissTee]

CD-ing did amp dramatically up after we lost a child in a terrible accident. Cd-ing for me has always had an air of escapism, and a means to gain fulfillment I couldn't otherwise get. I surmise I needed more after the accident to cope. I could be completely wrong, but whatever. I just know it helped me handle the pain and emotional grief.

[ossian]

I've been CDing since 12 or 13. Childhood had some epic seasonal family feuds that lasted for decades. Trauma and abuse, yes from an early age. It has taken me over 30 years and a lot of therapy to accept who I am. But I'm finally beginning to like the person and the CDer I
see in the mirror. Now here is the weird thing. I probably would be a CDer even without all the childhood trauma.

I've been under dressing pretty regularly over those thirty plus years. It is only since this last spring that it has taken a more external form. Yes, this has been an extraordinarily stressful last few years.

[Annie M]

No trauma no drama just always wanted to be a girl. I did put up a pretty good fight to be a real man for years, but I failed. Maybe that was my trauma? Hmmm never thought of that before. Nope, just always wanted to be a girl.

[CarleyR]

While I had fooled around with individual items of clothing when young, I never really 'dressed" until I was about 47. I did have fantasies, and would play around using bath towels as skirts, etc... but dressing, not until a few years ago. But once I allowed myself to actually purchase some basic items, and buying my first skirt really did I feel the flood gates opened up.

My experience is a little like this. I was curious as a child, but only did a little private experimentation. Once I became independent I sporadically purchased and tried pieces of women's lingerie, but life intervened and turned my attention to other things. Then, in the freedom and extra time and independence of maturity, interest reawakened, opportunity presented, I tried a bit, and the floodgate (sort of) opened.

In these circumstances, it is hard to divine any deep meaning.

[ReineD]

I have a pet theory:

I think that late onset CDing occurs when one or several barriers to the CDing are removed. Barriers can be external or internal.

Examples of external barriers are the kids having grown up so there is more freedom to dress, or having retired so there is more time to dress, or going from working in an office to working at home, a divorce or perhaps having become a widower, moving from a crowded neighborhood to some place that is more private ... and I'm sure there are others.

Examples of internal barriers are having reached a level of self-acceptance for the first time in your life, having suffered or witnessed some trauma thus realizing that life is short, being bored with life and looking for more excitement, experiencing diminishing testosterone after middle age which would make the CDing seem not so objectionable, or just generally having mellowed all around with age.

I think that for many people, early onset CDing (teenage years or above) is sexual, which then releases tons of dopamine. Years of exciting sexual release then causes a rewiring of the brain for life that is sustained even after the CDing is no longer always sexual in nature.

If it starts in very early childhood and continues with no interruption into adult life (as opposed to some kids who go through phases and then leave it behind), then likely the person is TS, whether it is Type IV, V, or VI. Not all TSs have the same desires to transition in the same way. ... but I digress.

[candydawn75]

Mine was actually my wife suggesting it. However after dressing at times for about couple of years now I realized it had been there for a while. Being a "man" you never want to admit you want to do it. Who knows there may be some truth to the trauma thing. My mother passed away about 4 years ago and I realized then I could only have a short time left, so I started doing things that made me happy. So far I am not as brave as most of you. I have never taken any pics and only been outside dressed once.

[Jillian Faith]

It's never been 'dormant' or latent for me.
I began when I was about 7 and it always just felt natural. I of course hid in the closet for decades, not wanting anyone to know for fear of all that society can throw at us. Then my wife discovered my secret and we talked, but the time wasn't right and back in the closet I went. Then about 10 years ago I just couldn't take being in there alone anymore and told her that I had never stopped and don't intend to ever stop. We talked and talked again and she was understanding and loving and she allowed me to begin to express myself.
Now I can be me and the limits I have are simply to
keep close friends and family unaware. Other than that we go out all the time and I dress whenever I please (every day now) and it's lifted all the guilt and fear I had for so many years. So I suppose in some sense I am a late bloomer who just started very young.

My story is very similar to Cheryl except that I was closer to 3 or 4 when I first felt a desire to be feminine and that I don't get to dress everyday now.

[Angela Campbell]

I have a pet theory:



If it starts in very early childhood and continues with no interruption into adult life (as opposed to some kids who go through phases and then leave it behind), then likely the person is TS, whether it is Type IV, V, or VI.

I guess that this describes it for me. There was also a point where it kind of exploded after years of pretty much being under control. (after I was 50) I have always known I was TS though. I never denied that to myself, but I did fight the idea of transition for a long time. I started at about 4.

[Jaymees22]

Yes I think Reine has the best and complete explanation. Thanks, Jaymee

[donnalee]

One thing I don't hear mentioned here is andropause, which hit me a dozen years ago including hot flashes, night sweats, etc. It took me quite a while to realize what was going on- almost 6 years! Has anyone else (genetic males only, please) experienced this or am I the only one? I've been on various heart meds for over 20 years (including spiro for all that time) and suspect that they have had more than a little influence over my lack of libido and the ability to express same. The dressing took a firm hold on me 7 years ago, but it took me 2 more to find this site - June marks my 5th year here (Yay!). Now it's 24/7 @ home, but drab when I'm out (I still have longtime associates who don't have to know more than I've let them). I read Virginia Woolf's "Orlando" when I was in my early teens and wondered if that was what would happen to me; some of what she described was close to some of my feelings at the time and I thought it might be interesting to experience both sexes in my lifetime (and hoped it would be as long as Orlando's). Looks like I made it part way at least!
Donna

[Anacita]

This is embarrassing, but my dressing correlated directly with use of hard drugs. It was only once I was really high that I could bring myself to do it.

I really need to see a shrink...