Results 1 to 23 of 23

Thread: Security whilst out en femme

  1. #1
    Member sue_donim's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    South Cumbria. U.K.
    Posts
    35

    Security whilst out en femme

    I appologise if this subject has been mentioned before but after a recent post by Emily Howard I was wondering what others in this forum do to protect themselves whilst out and about in femme. I realise in some countries carrying a weapon is not illegal but here in the UK it is.

    I normally carry a small can of deoderant or hairspray in my coat pocket, and I use the type with a groove in the top so I can tell which dirrection the spray is aimed without even looking at it. I would only use this as a last resort and imho it would also be plausable for a female to have in her possession if questioned by the police.

    So without including knives and firearms what do other members of this forum use for protection.

    Sue_donim
    Hugs Sue Donim

    I think therefore I am.

    Integrity (being true to you own values and beliefs) goes hand in hand
    with personal responsibility (accepting the consequences of your own
    actions).

  2. #2
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Pacific Northwest.
    Posts
    60
    I have a black belt in a martial art - its no good against guns, but should handle most situations pretty easily!

    Janelle.

  3. #3
    Member JulieFL's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    South Florida
    Posts
    121
    Janelle, I know in the UK firearms are illegal but what about pepper spray/mace? Same concept as your hairspray, just MUCH more effective.

    If you can purchase/carry defensive chemical sprays, I would suggest either a product called "Saber" or "Fox Labs 5.3" ( A google search will show you a plethora of places to purchase either) I've been on the receiving end of Saber a few times and it is NOT pleasant. Trust me when I say it will take the fight out of anyone getting sprayed who has never experienced getting sprayed before.

    As for what I use, as long as I'm not drinking or in a Bar, I take advantage of the fact that my State trusts me to carry a concealed firearm. Now I just need to find a sexy little thigh holster for my Kel-Tec P3AT.

    I cant carry ANY of my Glocks en-fem w/o out printing in a BAD way.

    JulieFL

  4. #4
    Silver Member Billijo49504's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Posts
    3,365
    JulieFL, that's what the purses with the gun tunnel are for. So you can rock with your glock. I've tucked the KelTec p32 in the cup of my bra or sometime between the cups.
    Actually, with chem sprays, besides checking if they are legal, and if they are, you have to check what strenght spray and what size container is legal.

  5. #5
    Lady In Waiting Rachel Ann's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Across the Bay from San Francisco
    Posts
    1,413
    I have a whistle and pepper spray (mace requires registration and a training course in California). My attitude about weapons has always been that they would only make matters worse - whomever I might face with a gun or a knife would surely be more capable than I with it, and would just love to prove it.


    Quote Originally Posted by _Janelle_
    I have a black belt in a martial art - its no good against guns, but should handle most situations pretty easily!
    Sorry, but that won't do you much good if there are 5 of them and they don't care about consequences.

    My sensei taught me to follow Master Lee, who said "a belt is to hold your pants up".
    Last edited by Rachel Ann; 12-17-2005 at 12:58 AM.
    In another time's forgotten space
    Your eyes looked through your mother's face
    Wildflower seed and sand and stone
    May the four winds blow you safely home
    - Robert Hunter

  6. #6
    Junior Member Gilded Graper's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    NYC & Charlotte, NC
    Posts
    62
    When you're attacked, you don't have time to take out a weapon.
    Small spray that you can keep in your hand at all times is good.

    It's impractical to walk in New York City holding a gun, a knife, or stun gun in your hand.

    Don't be out alone in drag... unless you're hooking.
    Also, look way ahead and try to use women's intuition to avoid trouble.

    When confronted, I relax, smile and say something humourous and try to engage them in a conversation. All the while moving towards some defensive structure, lamp or sign post, or trash can, so that I'll have time to get out what ever weapon I'm carrying. Can of RED spray paint, something in the public trash can...

  7. #7
    New Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    on a island in south texas
    Posts
    13
    small can of hair spray with a cigarette lighter if you don,t want to carry a gun. for me, i go to the gun range at least one time ,maby two times a weak. and i do have a brown belt in the arts..if you are lets say going to your car alone get your keys out and put one key between each finger and close your hand into a fist and if you are close to the ******* then you can cut his face with the keys .,,,just swing at his face and at the same time kick him in the nuts and he will go down and then kick him in the face.,,, just think it is you or him.,,,if you have on a spike heel take it off when he is down and hit him with that spike right in the head or face. and you can scream while you are fighting for your life.there is no fair fight.it is you or them.,,,,jerri ann cd (ms highheels)

  8. #8
    Banned Read only terza's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    brooklyn, ny
    Posts
    74
    the reality of this is shamefull, yet
    regardless of the danger, i agree w/ rachel ann (maybe) that
    a gun or any other lethal weapons adds more violence to the world.
    years ago, my ex-girlfriend was going on a lone road trip accross the eastern coast of the states and was offered a gun for protection and declined the offer -- she, like myself, do not believe in guns.

  9. #9
    Joanie sterling12's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    3,420

    Careful With Concealment

    Hi Ladies;

    Last time I checked, if you put a gun down your bra, or stick it in a garter, or hide that weapon anywhere on your person and I believe in most States, that also includes a purse. You are now carrying a CONCEALED WEAPON! I think that's also true for mace or a taser.

    At least in my state, if you do that without a permit, you have now committed a felony. In the event you are stoped by the police, (much more likely to occur than ever using your weapon to ward off a crime), if nothing else, let the policeman know that you have a concealed weapon on your person. Do so...with your hands in the air. Trust me, the officer will remove that weapon as quickly as possible! If you fail to say anything and they find your weapon while frisking you.....bad things are likely to happen, very bad things. As somebody else said, don't p**s em' off!

    One of the best weapons if assaulted, scream your bloody head off and fight back. Almost all criminals prey upon the weakest and they don't like trouble or a fight. You don't have to win the fight, just make it "difficult". Tends to draw unwanted attention.

    Last piece of advise, if ever assaulted your now in a position just like a GG. NEVER allow yourself to be pulled into an automobile and driven away. The odds if that occurs, go toward a probability that you could die!

    Sorry, this is all pretty bleak. Here's the good part: The chances that you would actually get into a dire situation are very small. Probably one in hundreds of thousands. As others have said, if you use good sense and stay in well lighted areas and stick to groups, the odds become almost nil!

    Oh boy, enough of the grim stuff. Can we go back to discussing fashions now? (LOL)

    Love, Joanie

  10. #10
    She Is What She Is Darlena's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    50 mi. from Seattle
    Posts
    239

    A Lady's First Line Of Defense Is......

    Her gray matter. What I mean to say is think about what you are about to do. Try never to go out alone. Have an strategy. Wear flats and no heels for the obvious reasons. Always carry a purse with you when you go out . I am truely sorry that you live in the U.K. where a Girl has very few options other than to have the coroner pick up her mortal remains when it's all over . So until your Govt. overseers become more enlightened, put a brick in your purse like me.
    [SIZE=4]Darlena
    [/SIZE]

  11. #11
    Member Barbara B's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    West Sussex, South Coast, UK
    Posts
    185
    Here in the UK you need to be very carefull about what you carry for protection! make sure it is something you would normaly carry or you could end up in trouble. A can of cheap hairspray or a small can of deodorant is about it I would think. My brother used to be a football ref and always made sure the deodorant was to hand when leaving the ground after a match.

  12. #12
    Member Sophia Rearen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Southeast PA
    Posts
    844
    Quote Originally Posted by JulieFL
    I've been on the receiving end of Saber a few times and it is NOT pleasant. Trust me when I say it will take the fight out of anyone getting sprayed who has never experienced getting sprayed before.
    JulieFL
    How does that happen?
    [SIZE=4]Sophia[/SIZE]

  13. #13
    Platinum Member
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Posts
    31,706
    of corse safty is key when going out and the best plan is to do it in the safest way we can... be carefull and be safe....

  14. #14
    Gender Outlaw Kim E's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    New York
    Posts
    582
    I agree with JulieFL. If you feel the need to carry some form of protection and its legal in your state, then I would go with pepper spray. I carry a small 2 oz canister in my purse when I'm out. I've used it a few times (in my job) and I've been on the receiving end a few times (training) and can say it works well in most, but not all cases.

    I own many handguns and don't carry one, as a rule, in public. It can be asking for more trouble if it were to be lost, stolen or actually used. The best protection is to use common sense and to not place yourself in a situation where you need to defend yourself.

    Here's some info for my home state of NY.

    Kim

    The New York State Self-Defense Spray Law - Penal Law 265.20
    Requires special labeling and control of sales. In order to purchase this product the law states:

    • You must be over the age of 18.
    • You must have no history of felony convictions or assaults.
    • Product must be purchased from an authorized dealer, pharmacy or gun dealer.
    • You must complete a form with your name, address, birth date and signature.

    REMEMBER

    • You can’t bring a spray from another state into New York.
    • You can’t buy it online.
    • You can’t give it to a minor.

  15. #15
    Member Billie1's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Central New York
    Posts
    474

    It can happen!

    Hi, girlz!

    I feel that some sort of security is needed when going out, anyway, and more so when en femme.

    Last summer, we stopped at a large, 24-hr supermarket to pick up a few things for breakfast. My girlfriend always carries (legally, with a CCW permit) a small .22 caliber automatic in her clutch bag.

    We got hassled on the way back to the car, and after a few words were exchanged, she took a defensive posture with her bag. There were four obviously drunk young men, and two of us. And, I had three-inch heels and my slightly too-tight black mini-skirt on, so I wasn't about to start running.
    The light came on in their beer-addled (small) brains and, after a few more comments, we got in the car and left.

    This was the only time in over five years that anything like this had happened, but it was scary.

    I now carry a small can of pepper spray in my bag, just in case.

    It's sad, but I think that it is a commentary on the times we live in.

    After all, I'm a lover, not a fighter!
    I learned the laws of physics by watching Road Runner cartoons.

    Do you have that, in a tall?

  16. #16
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Los Angeles CA
    Posts
    2,155

    advice

    Pepper spray is what I carry for self defense---I do own a couple of handguns but don't carry them because of the legalities---both in having one in my purse and then actually shooting someone with it. I'm not sure I could actually pull the trigger(maybe yes maybe no) so I'm probably better off not carrying it. I also have quite a bit of training in martial arts---karate, judo and aikido---but am sure that with three 1/2 inch heels and a skirt I would be somewhat limited in what I could do---having said all that I never had an occasion where I felt physically challenged---there have been a few, very few, verbal exchanges which I have ignored. Your best bet is to be careful where you go and what you do.--If you do carry pepper spray, make sure you are careful---a T-Girl friend of mine Jennifer, was accosted in a bar--she took out her can of pepperspray and missed her assailant but hit the bartender and two uninvolved patrons---it did work however, the man who accosted her almost fell of the barstool laughing so hard.

  17. #17
    Member Sophia Rearen's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Location
    Southeast PA
    Posts
    844
    Quote Originally Posted by Billie1

    ...she took a defensive posture with her bag.
    Just the simple "act" of going for your bag works.
    When in drab, go for the inside of your coat, like you're carrying a piece.
    If you're on the beach, well you're on your own. Try kicking sand.

    I too, am a lover, not a fighter!
    [SIZE=4]Sophia[/SIZE]

  18. #18
    Member sue_donim's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    South Cumbria. U.K.
    Posts
    35
    Quote Originally Posted by _Janelle_
    I have a black belt in a martial art - its no good against guns, but should handle most situations pretty easily!
    Janelle I agree martial arts is a good option if you are qualified although I would be unsure about doing some of the kick turns in heels.

    What about the girls who have no training.

    [QUOTE=_JulieFL_]I know in the UK firearms are illegal but what about pepper spray/mace? Same concept as your hairspray, just MUCH more effective.

    [QUOTE]
    Julie here in the Uk pepper spray/mace is also illegal. Thats why I use a small can hairspray.

    In my origional post I asked what people used and said without including guns and knives.

    Sue_donim
    Hugs Sue Donim

    I think therefore I am.

    Integrity (being true to you own values and beliefs) goes hand in hand
    with personal responsibility (accepting the consequences of your own
    actions).

  19. #19
    Outdoor girl seeking..... Sam-antha's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Scotland
    Posts
    6,284
    \I see no reason to up the violence, assuming there is any in the first place.
    Fear there will be, fear of exposure.
    Nothing like the exposure that will come out in court when you answer the charge of assault : premeditated, grievous bodily harm & etc.( partially blinding someone). Think of the legal costs and the damage costs too.
    In the Glasgow fashion, I think that keys are too damaging and there is no time to stick something between your fingers, like coins or a comb. Headbanging his nose with your own skull is perhaps difficult, but the results are spectacular and could be described as a single blow in self defence.
    I would not think there is time really to go for whatever weapon you choose to carry, not unless you have gone for it before the assault becomes real.
    Real assaults are going to be under the heading of muggings and could happen to you in drab.
    Best to be sensible and react according to the circs.
    Remember in the Uk someone ended up in jail for the killing (unlawful) of a burglar ?
    .
    'Kerriana "Samantha.....i feel like I'm hearing her through fractured glass.. She makes sense if you kinda squint"


  20. #20
    Senior Member suzy's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2005
    Posts
    1,290

    What? Guns? What?

    Hi everyone,

    My two cents is this..... As the lady that I am, I go to great lengths to avoid violence. I am vigilant and cautious. I don't hesitate to leave if I sense trouble brewing. However, having said that, I also carry a firearm in my bag. I am trained and licensed to carry and to use it. That's the absolute last thing that I would wish to do, for several obvious reasons.

    I understand that each state in the United States approaches the carrying of a concealed firearm in different manners so it would behove each of you that does carry a gun to study the laws in the states you are carrying the weapon.

    If I can leave before violence I will, but if I can not, I don't plan on being the dead one laying in the street.

    Hugs and kisses...

    Suzy

  21. #21
    ~ Bondage & Pantyhose ~ cosmolovesph's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Phoenix, AZ area...
    Posts
    1,181
    At 6' 1" (without heels) and a "larger woman"

    I am not necessarilly the 1st target for a would be dip-$h!t to attempt to take what is not theirs. That being said, keep your wits about you and have your keys ready when walking to your car etc...
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Crissandra
    ~AKA - Cosmo-Loves-PantyHose~
    Don't forget to compliment those wearing pantyhose, as to how nice their legs look!

  22. #22
    Lady In Waiting Rachel Ann's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Location
    Across the Bay from San Francisco
    Posts
    1,413
    Girls

    Let's back up from the self-defense issues for a moment and think about ways to avoid being attacked in the first place. A lot of this is common-sense stuff most GGs observe.

    Try to avoid going out dressed alone at night unless going someplace where you can park right out front. Stay out of straight saloons or roadhouses where you don't know anybody. If you must walk down a dark street, wearing an androgynous big coat with a hood or hat (take your wig off and change shoes!) makes you harder to spot as a target.

    Have a spare car and house key to attach to a flexible band (like a piece of phone cord) and wear around your wrist when in questionable situations.

    Try to avoid ever being stopped in traffic next to a car full of young guys. If they do spot and clock you, drive at once to a well-lit populated area like a shopping center or large gas station, or if need be to a block containing a police station.

    Don't try on wigs or clothes in malls that are full of teens, especially when in drab. If you do, have a path of escape to your car always in mind. Private security is unlikely to be sympathetic.

    Write this on the board 500 times: No matter how well armed or trained you are, somebody who doesn't care about consequences trumps that. Many a Karate-trained person has learned that to their woe at the hands of biker types or oafish youths. And if you're outnumbered, kick your heels off, scream and run.

    I'm going to a party that will include a talk on this topic by an expert next week and will update you with what I learn there. This sort of thing is especially prevalent around the holidays.

    Love

    Rachel xx
    Last edited by Rachel Ann; 12-17-2005 at 12:21 PM.
    In another time's forgotten space
    Your eyes looked through your mother's face
    Wildflower seed and sand and stone
    May the four winds blow you safely home
    - Robert Hunter

  23. #23
    Action crossdresser Marlena Dahlstrom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    SF Bay Area
    Posts
    1,601
    Rachel makes a very good point about avoiding trouble in the first place.

    It's also worth avoiding "playing the victim." Obviously there are some people who may just attack you regardless, but a lot of times bullies will back off if they realize the object of their attack is going to fight back.

    I realize it's tough when you're in a threatening situation, but for the most part it's going to verbal harassment, which can be dealt with via some verbal judo. Naming if you act like you're not ashamed to be a crossdresser, it's hard for others to make fun of you.

    Eddie Izzard dealt with this in one his routines.
    (Eddie as a chav): Hey whatta think you are? A bloke in a dress?
    (Eddie as self): Why, yes I am.
    (Eddie as chav): Well, urm...

    I know it's hard to think on your feet in these sorts of situations, so it's helpful to think of a number of come-backs ahead of time. Such as:

    If someone staring, walk up to them and say "I know you're too shy to ask for my autograph, but don't worry I'd be happy to give you one."

    If someone asks who you think you're fooling, say "I'm not trying to fool anyone, I'm just making the outside reflect how I feel on the inside today."

    Etc.
    Lena

    A dream? What is a dream, but a blueprint for courageous action.

    http://www.adahlshouse.com

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  


Check out these other hot web properties:
Catholic Personals | Jewish Personals | Millionaire Personals | Unsigned Artists | Crossdressing Relationship
BBW Personals | Latino Personals | Black Personals | Crossdresser Chat | Crossdressing QA
Biker Personals | CD Relationship | Crossdressing Dating | FTM Relationship | Dating | TG Relationship


The crossdressing community is one that needs to stick together and continue to be there for each other for whatever one needs.
We are always trying to improve the forum to better serve the crossdresser in all of us.

Browse Crossdressers By State