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Thread: It's getting easier.

  1. #1
    Member Kimberlyfaye's Avatar
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    It's getting easier.

    I came out today! But not in the usual way.

    I had an eye test today and I was sitting waiting to go in thinking of whether I should be honest with them as to why I wanted a new pair of glasses. I was in drab, just your average guy. Basically I wanted to get some from the womens range and so when I went to pick my frames I asked the lady if she could help. "I have a bit of a strange request." I asked. "I'm a bit bi-gendered and I wanted to get some frames for when I dress up." So I showed her a picture of me dressed from my phone. "Oh, wow!" She replied. "Ok, I will get one of my colleagues to help you in a moment. The womens range is just over there, so feel free to look and someone will be with you soon." I headed to those frames and started looking and after a couple of minutes one of her colleagues came over to help. "My colleague said you were looking for some womens frames and you had a picture to get an idea of what you wanted?" He asked. I showed him and he started helping me pick out some frames. He gave me his opinion based on the picture and the fact he was trying to visualise me en femme. "I think those are quite fashiobable and they aren't too risky either. They do suit you too." So anyway, after I had picked out some frames I just chatted to him about the strange request and he replied, "I don't think it's strange, whatever makes you happy is fine with me. I'm just that type of person."
    I am very happy now because although it's not the usual coming out, I just realised how little it matters to some people. They were so helpful and I'm glad I had a good experience with the mini coming out. It felt like it was just a little bit more of that weight has been lifted from my shoulders I plan to formally praise them for their professionalism when I go to collect my glasses.

    Anyway, I just wanted to share my story. Coming out on any level is not as scary as some might imagine. xx
    I've always been the kind of girl that hid my face, so afraid to tell the world, what I've got to say. But I have this dream bright inside of me. No more hiding who I wanna be. This is me.

  2. #2
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    Really nice story to read, I'm glad your courage was rewarded with not only a professional but also a respectful and overall nice attitude by the staff at that place.

    Reading about situations like this helps many of us who are still not brave enough to venture out and admit we cross dress publicly, so thanks for sharing it

  3. #3
    Gold Member Maria in heels's Avatar
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    Its great that you were able to choose a new style for Kimberly. I'm sure that it was a scary moment, but please remember to share your new glasses with us when you get them!

  4. #4
    Lindsey Alexandra paulaloha's Avatar
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    Awesome and inspiring story. It always makes me happy when I hear stories of acceptance in society. Every time it makes me want to push out a little more and be a little more bold and open with who I am.
    I think it is definitely a great idea to thank them for their professional attitude and service, companies need to know that this is the kind of people they need on staff!

    And you definitely have to show us some pictures of the new glasses! I have been wanting to some since I think they can add a little bit of femininity to the face, but I don't need glasses personally so I've been wanting some with fake lenses in them.

    Congrats on another small victory in your life Kimberly!
    Finally decided on a name! Lindsey

    "Let us step into the night and pursue that flighty temptress, adventure."
    J.K. Rowling

  5. #5
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    Hi Kim, That's a wonderful story.
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

    If at first you don't succeed, Then Skydiving isn't for you.

    Be careful what you wish for, Once you ring a bell , you just can't Un-Ring it !! !!

  6. #6
    Gone to live my life
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    Wonderful story Kim. I would love to get some feminine frames for when I am en femme.

    Hugs

    Isha

  7. #7
    Junior Member Courtney . J's Avatar
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    awesome story ! im looking foward to the day that almost everybody accepts us that way ! ,.. now , lets see some pics of you in your hot new glasses
    "when life hands ya lemons , make lemonade ,. and sell it for $10 a cup to all the people that has tried to put you down in life and failed "- CJ

  8. #8
    Gold Member Cynthia Anne's Avatar
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    Being treated like that is what makes shopping so much fun! Thanks for sharing such an inspiring story!
    If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:

  9. #9
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    Kimberly - You are gutsy and your story is inspiring. We usually worry so much about how people will react that we don't give them the opportunity to treat us like anyone else. Your story is so encouraging. Thanks.

  10. #10
    Junior Member Victoria Davison's Avatar
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    What a great story! The takeaway for me is: it is a 2-way street. If you meet SAs half-way, it makes it so much easier to get good service and what will look best on you.

    Some would say being so open invites discrimination or some other kind of backfire, but people that discriminate also see through your "it's for my wife" story anyways, being forward shows them you are in your natural state, and may ease their (unfounded) intolerance or prejudices.

  11. #11
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    I find coming out to SAs and other anonymous people is easy after you have done it a few times.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  12. #12
    Junior Member SaraNZ's Avatar
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    Good on you...I find those little encouters quite liberating as well. I typically have to prime myself with answers and usually decide what to say based on my mood before going in to a shop.

  13. #13
    Member Kimberlyfaye's Avatar
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    Aww thanks for the lovely comments everyone. I've never thought of myself as gutsy or inspiring before. It definately felt liberating to be so open and get a good reaction. My next aim is to come out when buying clothes! I asked a young girl her opinion on a dress the other day but I didn't say it was for me. I joked that "well of course I wouldn't wear it" even though I would lols. So bring on the clothes shopping!

    I'm glad I have given some of you a bit more confidence. I am learning all the time how easy it actually is to be accepted. As are we all. For me, these little steps are taking me to a better life and I hope to share more stories like this soon.

    By all means I will take some pictures with my new specs! They are so pretty and feminine.I can't wait to collect them
    I've always been the kind of girl that hid my face, so afraid to tell the world, what I've got to say. But I have this dream bright inside of me. No more hiding who I wanna be. This is me.

  14. #14
    Hi, I'm Ria xdressed's Avatar
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    Like I often say, it's all about confidence ^_^

    Be upfront and unashamed to people and they will treat you with respect, great story Kim
    Bi-Gendered, Goth/Metal Fan, Atheist, Artist and British

  15. #15
    Platinum Member
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    Great story, Kimberly. I did something similar some months ago when I appeared for my annual eye exam en femme for the first time. Everyone was very professional. And later I tried on some women's styles...ended up with a pair that are I suppose androgynous.

  16. #16
    Aspiring Member TeresaCD's Avatar
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    Way to go!
    I had a hotel check in as the boy, after checking out en femme the previous time.
    The girl had changed my prefix to Ms, the check in lady was changing it back, embarrassed.
    I said 'that's ok, I'm transgender, not fussed really'
    Simple really, yet profound..
    Learning to be me - the best me I can be

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