I am a happily married man with two children and lead a very simple life, not looking for a lot, just pray for health and try to smile everyday. It's so easy, why must I make it so hard. I choose to keep my dressing in the closet, I am very happy if I could get three or four hours a week to myself and dress and just relax and with my wife being accepting it makes it even easier. That's to easy isn't it. Sunday afternoon kids both go out, wife's going out to meet a friend and now it's Maria time. With lots of time I go full out make-up and all. I look outside and see both neighbours are also out, before my wife leaves I ask her if she can pull a lawn chair close to the door since the neighbours are not home maybe I will sit outside. She's a sweet heart, she pulls the chair up and gives me the warning to be careful, a kiss on the cheek and off she goes, I pour a glass of wine and go outside and sit on the lawn chair. I am being careful every sound I am like a deer in the forest reacting to every sound, at that point I ask myself? Why? What makes me do this to myself, taking a chance of being seen and not even relaxing being so careful of ever sound. It's so much easier just to stay inside, yes it is a great feeling the sun on my pantyhose the cool air up my skirt but at what price will I pay if I get seen out there. I go inside and I stare at the door that I just entered and again I ask myself, why? What is it that drags me out that door, I could be so safe if I stay in, what game is my mind playing with me. I have to ask the question. What is it that makes us take theses chances? Why do we have to so badly walk out that door. I don't understand what super power it is, but it is powerful.
