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Thread: 3rd person references to our female names?

  1. #1
    Member cdmorganashley's Avatar
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    3rd person references to our female names?

    So I am seeing that so many times in posts there are references to the dressers female persona as though it is a separate entity from the male persona... is this something more common with CDs and not with transsexuals? Or maybe just why do people do this? I have to say I do not view myself dressed as a female as being different from myself dressed as a male in terms of my mental state... I mean obviously the appearance is different but I feel I am the same me, or maybe even more me than when I am in male mode but its not like a different personality or anything like that... so I would say that I view my female name as what my chosen name would be and my male name as my birth name, but I don't consider myself two identities (male name) and Morgan... it's just me... maybe the way I see some members on here using the 3rd person in this way don't feel it signifies anything but it interested me how it happens, anyway, I would appreciate people sharing their views on this...
    Last edited by cdmorganashley; 10-02-2013 at 04:15 PM. Reason: spelling

  2. #2
    Ice queen Lorileah's Avatar
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    Lori agrees with you
    The earth is the mother of all people and all people should have equal rights upon it.
    Chief Joseph
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    “Love isn't a state of perfect caring. It is an active noun like struggle. To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.” - Fred Rogers,

  3. #3
    amy wanagione's Avatar
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    Although I do separate the male and female at times, not often, to make a point and when I talk to my wife. I'll say I'm having an Amy day today. But in my heart and soul I am Amy. There is no distintion between my male and female side.

  4. #4
    Member cdmorganashley's Avatar
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    You're too funny Lori =P

  5. #5
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    Perhaps it is like saying "there are two sides to every story", or as in the novel Dr. Jeckle and Mr. Hyde! Both are real and viewed by others as who they really are at that moment. It is best to enjoy both sides of our entire being.

  6. #6
    Senior Member robindee36's Avatar
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    I do this on occasion but have no real justification for it. Perhaps we that are not FT must live a dual existence. As such, one of the identities may, correctly, refer to the other in the third person. There are certain traits and characteristics of each identity and, in my case, quite different tastes

    When you refer to transsexuals, I assume this means girls in transition; on HRT; living FT; awaiting SRS; etc. In these cases there is only one persona to deal with which should make things a bit easier.

    Does this make sense??? I would appreciate a sanity check on my thinking. Might be a low oxygen situation here in the closet, again.

    Hugs, Robin

  7. #7
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    Kim concurs. On a related matter...ever try writing in second person? you should!

  8. #8
    Senior Member Laura912's Avatar
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    I am referred to by my name when my evil twin is speaking with his wife who is my SO.

  9. #9
    Senior Member robindee36's Avatar
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    Kim, writing in third person is the topic as I understood it. First person is Robin; second person is the male persona who refers to her in the third person. Lets see, first person; second person; third person. What the heck, we've got a trio. Unfortunately, none of me has musical talent, boo hoo.

    Hugs, Robin

  10. #10
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    I'm a cd, not a transsexual. Short of losing a few pounds, I have no desire to change my anatomy. I also feel the same... as just me... whether I'm (male name) or Jennifer but sometimes my priorities, thoughts, and actions change so I use the different names to help distinguish how I feel at the time. A couple years ago these two views were more distinct, but they're gradually becoming closer and more in sync so sometimes I consciously debate how to refer to myself at a given moment.

  11. #11
    Dani Dani0948's Avatar
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    Robin, you're on the right track. Being in the closet creates 2 modes of thinking. When I'm dressed I feel all girly. When I'm in guy mode I want to get dressed.

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Laura912 View Post
    I am referred to by my name when my evil twin is speaking with his wife who is my SO.
    Sounds like the makings of an HBO series

  13. #13
    Making a life for Tina! suchacutie's Avatar
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    I can only explain my situation as bi-gendered. My two gendered selves have some similarities, but also many many differences. We have come to identify certain characteristics of my two selves and we use my two names to identify those characteristics. My two selves can, and have, look at situations and make two different decisions depending upon which gender we have asked to consider the situation.

    The best description about this that I can imagine is, "two apps working off of the same database". We have one brain (database) but we use that brain differently. Tina finds it really annoying to be drawn into a "male" life situation because she feels so out of character, but she can access those ideas if she must. Likewise my male self can try to determine how Tina might act in a certain situation.

    It's not simple, but this duality has made many life situations much clearer and understandable!

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    Lol @ Lori, you beat me to that.

    Well I never have had an issue, whatever I'm called it's just me. I prefer the female name obviously and internally I don't relate to my boi name. I think it's more towards CDers using both. Trans-girls are really headed away from the previous male label/name and don't associate with it much for anything. Why should they? Then again it's down to personal choices. One or the other or both or combinations thereof. In the end there's still one person.

  15. #15
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    Well, I think she's the same as me but Kate kind of sees it differently. When she goes out to dance and socialize, she has most of the fun and I just kind of tag along. It could be due to the fact that we enrolled in Dr. Doom's assertiveness course. In that we learned that Doom does this and Doom does that but Victor doesn't do much of anything. Doom blames it totally on Richards--Richards!!!
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  16. #16
    Lady in Being (7/20/17) AmyGaleRT's Avatar
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    I sometimes refer to Amy in the third person, but it's mostly just a shorthand way of saying "my Amy-self." Which is to say "me," as the two halves of myself are one and inseparable. I might be referring to something I'd be doing when in Amy-mode, however.

    My fiancee has picked up the habit to some extent. In a recent text exchange, she lamented that a certain HolyClothing tunic wasn't in her size, then suggested, "Amy could get it though." Actually, she couldn't, though, it was too small for her. I noted that Amy's bust size was 52 inches, and she responded "Really thought she was smaller oh well."

    - Amy
    Amy Gale Ruth Bowersox (nee Tapie) - "Be who you are, and be it in style!"
    Member, Board of Trustees, Gender Identity Center of Colorado
    aka Amelia Storm - Ms. Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2018-2019, Miss Majestic Hearts of All Colorado 2015-2016

  17. #17
    Bad Little Girl Yolanda_Voils's Avatar
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    There is two people here, when I'm in female mode, I am 100% Yolanda.
    When dressed "endrabbe" I'm 100% male.

    This may explain why the 3rd person reference.

  18. #18
    Rachel Rachelakld's Avatar
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    Depends, currently I'm writing on Rachels behalf as my personality is still I male mode, if I give my sub-personality "Rachel" some time (normally once or twice a week), she would write it as I.
    I switch to girl mode when writing my blog and sometimes here, but a bit busy today.
    See all my photos, read many stories of my outings and my early days at
    http://rachelsauckland.blogspot.co.nz

  19. #19
    Isn't Life Grand? AllieSF's Avatar
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    I occasionally refer top Allie (me en femme) as a third person, but very rarely. Here is what it is like when way over done!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Apa0nG1OfUc

  20. #20
    Member melanie206's Avatar
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    Like Amy says, it's just a convenient reference. Instead of saying, "I have not been out en femme for awhile" or however you might say it, it's easy and accurate to say "Melanie has not been out for awhile". Efficient and sadly true.

  21. #21
    Aspiring Member vallerie lacy's Avatar
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    I find it to be very convenient using third person references. If I don't get things done around the house that my wife asked me to do, I'll just blame Vallerie. Sorry honey, Vallerie said she would do that. When I realized she didn't do it, I sent her to bed without dinner. Perhaps a new pair of heels might give her an incentive to get things done.
    After searching my lingerie drawers, I have come to the conclusion that they lied. Ruffles don't have ridges. At least mine don't.

  22. #22
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    Hi Morgan, The only reason That Blue Orchid exists was because I need a name on the forum.

    Oh well, I guess that was third person wasn't it ??
    Having my ears triple pierced is AWESOME, ~~......

    I can explain it to you, But I can't comprehend it for you !

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  23. #23
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    As a CDer we can take an individual stance on the issue.
    Someone undergoing transition has more than likely severed relations with any male persona.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  24. #24
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    I heard that Heather agrees, too.

  25. #25
    Senior Member Barbra P's Avatar
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    Referring to our female persona in the third-person just makes it easier to convey which persona we are referring to; I wouldn’t read too much into the use of third-person narrative. Sometimes a pipe is just a pipe (Sigmund Freud – often misquoted as sometimes a cigar is just a cigar).

    Third-person narrative makes it easier to tell a story where both the male and female personas are involved. Frequently I’ll write that I did this or that or went here en femme but sometimes that becomes awkward. Rather than continually clarify for the reader which persona I’m referring to I’ll just swith to the third-person narrative when referring to female persona. It becomes “I” did this or that when referring to me (my male self) and Barbra did this or that when referring to my female self. I could write that I was outside en femme when the next door neighbor came over and we chatted, or I can say that I was outside en femme when the next door neighbor came over and she and Barbra had a long chat; or I could write that I went to see my Therapist en femme, but I could also write that I went as Barbra to see my Therapist.
    Babs

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