What Do Sales Assistants Think

[deebra]

What do sales assistants "think" when they come in contact with a MtF CD. I'm not asking so much as to how they act towards the CD but what is there mental feelings to this person. The CD could be
1/ dressed as a male browsing womens clothing
2/ dressed in drab (half male/half female) browsing womens clothing
3/ dressed as a woman browsing womens clothing and trying them on

We all have no idea what another person is thinking but this is 2013 and a lot of what use to be forbidden and looked down on is now accepted because our young people have crossed standard barriers, put it in our face wheather you like it or not and we have gotten use to it and pretty much accepted it. Is this true with MtF CDing today? When dressed and passing and interacting with neighbors, sales assistants, shoppers in the mall, etc. are people locked in to their own thoughts and are starting to accept or overlook us just like the young people? But let's mainly limit your opinion to the original question, what do SA think.

[Laura912]

Given the variation in humans, they think all sorts of things based to some extent on their age. The thoughts probably run the gamut from "creep" to "another sales" to "I really want to help this person".

[Stephy]

I think it depends a lot on the individual SA - what sort of environment they have grown up in, what they have been exposed to. I have noticed SAs in the Sydney CBD are far more accepting than those in the suburbs. But I guess being accepting does not necessarily mean that they think of the CD as just another customer - they may still think to themselves - "gosh you get all sorts of freaks here" while smiling and assisting. Maybe some are better than others at hiding their distaste, or have had better training. I would love to know what they are really thinking, but one can only judge what they might be thinking based on their actions, words or how sincere they appear. I've thought of asking them, but it's not likely they would give a straight answer.

[deebra]

Stephy, love your answer, I'm cracking up over "gosh you get all sorts of freaks in here". And thats probially very, very true.

[secretlyme]

I've always shopped in guy mode and have experienced the full spectrum of reactions ranging from completely helpful with genuine interest from the SA to moderately begrudging helpfulness. Although I've seen disdain in their eyes on occasion, none have ever been outwardly rude or antagonistic. Other shoppers might leer or laugh at times - mostly teens - but some actually show peaked interest, bordering on fascination. Regardless of any reaction, I enjoy what I do and I know that it makes me happy; reactions from others don't hinder the experience. Don't let anything stop you from pursuing your passion.

[Kate Simmons]

Offhand, they are probably hoping they will make a sale.

[Ressie]

If we could only read other people's minds for a day...

[Lexi Moralas]

I think it depends on the SA. I prefer to shop fully dressed but that is rarely possible. There are times especially with younger SA's it seems like they could care less I'm just another customer and they are happy I'm shopping there. One rainbow store loves to see me coming, I keep them from getting stuck with the size 10 shoes on the clearance rack. I've paid as little as $3.00 for really great shoes ( love the rainbow store BTW if the are in your area check it out)
And some times you get some smart ass who is nice , and help full enough but just can't resist saying have a nice day SIR just to let you know you didn't fool them. These SA's are usually at the big discount department stores I've gotten this a couple of times at Burlington coat factory. But I get great stuff there at such amazing deals its worth it. And some times I think the SA is all excited about helping you so they have an unusual story to there friends after work.
But all in all as long as no one is disrespectful it all good. But a real good SA can really make the experience 100 more enjoyable

[Beverley Sims]

What ever type of "different" shopper that approaches them they generally think.... "Another one."
They have seen it all from the downright rude, to the extremely polite.

[Bambi87]

I recently had a make over in a well known store and the sa was more than helpful and actually said she was very excited to work her magic on me I had a great time Bambi x

[denese]

most of the time the SA'S do not even ask if i need help and if they do i usually say "just looking" and they go about their job. even the cashiers just ring up the sale since to them it's just another sale. i did have one interesting time in wallyworld though. i was looking through the panties and a SA who was walking past stopped, smiled and said "they would look so good with your eyes" and then walked on. she was not from that department and i felt that this was a sincere comment from her. it made my day.

[Michelle (Oz)]

I've formed friendships with some of the SAs in my home city. I've asked them what they thought when I first went in their shops and whether they have had any other CDers shop there.

Their observations are interesting and instructive. Universally they commented that I was friendly, pleasant and appreciative of their help (all true). They said that it is easy to be friendly to some one who is friendly but less so to someone who is not. They are very open and encouraging of difference and have a 'you only live once' attitude.

I have had the same said to me by hotel staff, airlines, rental cars, cafes, restaurants ... and the list goes on.

The message is to be genuinely friendly and appreciative. It is a good thing if someone feels better about their day because of our interaction with them.

Oh, and one SA said that there was a CDer come into the shop very occasionally. She thinks that he stole clothes. Bummer!!

[Jodi]

I worked as an SA for both New York & Co and the Limited. I know how I thought. My job was to provide top notch service so as to separate as much money from the customer as they were willing to spend.

Experience has taught me, both as an SA and a shopper, well treated cd's in a store spend an awful lot of money. The better the treatment, the more they buy.

My job was to assist and sell, so I would bend over backwards to do both. I had return cd customers.

So, my thoughts--no judgments at all. Good customers that were willing to spend.

Jodi

[Karren H]

Not "Oh isn't that _nice ... he's buying bras for his wife" or "He must have lost a bet"! Lol

[stacycoral]

I think Karren has hit it on the nail, with this statement,

[suzanne]

Of course, all I have to go on is their reaction to me, and ultimately that's all that matters. My latest fave store is in the suburbs. The first time I went in, in drab, I was apprehensive about the reception I would receive from the sales staff. A needless worry, as the first woman I met immediately brightened up when I explained I was shopping for myself. We soon exchanged names and my shopping went smoothly with me buying just one dress. When they saw I was getting overheated in the fitting room, they brought me a bottle of water. Since then, whenever I go in, I am greeted warmly by my male name as if I were family. Whichever SA I get goes to great lengths to find items for me to try on. If one can infer what they are thinking based on that, I would say they enjoy, not merely tolerate, my shopping there. They have told me that while my physical shape is a challenge, they like that I ask for help and I am always polite and respectful. I feel as though I get exactly the same treatment as any female customer.

[Eryn]

Mimi and I went shopping at an outlet mall yesterday. I was dressed in a simple top and long skirt. We visited probably 30+ stores and in virtually every one of them we were greeted courteously as we entered the store.

What did the SAs think? Probably "Wow, look at that height difference!" I'm 5'14" and was wearing 2" heel sandals. Mimi's a foot shorter and was wearing flats.

I honestly don't think that they pegged me as a CDer from an initial glance. People outside of our community just don't think that way. To them I'm a very tall, not very attractive, fiftysomething woman in a world with wide variance in attractiveness and height.

Now, after talking to me, a muggle might suspect that I am not a GG. My voice is not as femme as I wish it were and I may accidentally use a masculine mannerism or two. Even if they do suspect they cannot be sure. so they will default to my obvious presentation.

Most likely, since they see hundreds of customers coming into the store every day, their thoughts are probably on selling merchandise, returning merchandise to the racks, keeping things tidy, and what they will be doing with their SOs after work. I'm just one of the people they encounter during their day.

[Diversity]

I've mostly gotten a friendly reception from SA's. But on one occasion, I very politely walked up to an older SA in a small shop and told her that as a courtesy to her, I was a CD'r and asked her if she would be willing to help me with some items. She flatly told me that she did not wish to do so, as she preferred to only have women in her shop. I said that is okay. I understood that such may be the case, and that is why I approached her in the way I did. I thanked her and walked out.
I believe if we get an 'inner sense' of such a view with an SA, we must be respectful of their feelings (which are not necessarily the feelings of the store, unless the SA is the owner, which could have been the situation in this instance, as it was a small shop), and in fairness recognize that we are 'different to society's norm', and thus should be respectful as long as the SA's are courteous to us.
There are indeed many other shops to visit. The loss is theirs - not ours...
Di
s

[CynthiaD]

As long as you're treated we'll, it doesn't matter what they think. Since we can't read minds, we don't actually know what anyone really thinks of us. Including our best friends, SO's, close family members, etc. We can only interpret based on what others say and do. Usually we're right, but sometimes we're very, very wrong. That's life.

[jjjjohanne]

I have had two interesting comments from SA's. I normally go out as a guy in a skirt if I dress up at all. One clerk, who seemed almost happy that I was a CD, commented on how some of her CD customers were rude and fussed at them about their selection of sizes. Another SA commented offhandedly that she thought she preferred how I was dressed but presenting male. I interpreted that to mean that she found the make-up and the either pretending or disguising as female to be creepy or something.

[smeat]

In all cases I think it's mostly how you act.

If you act nervous and ashamed, expect to be treated like you are doing something wrong. If you're avoiding other customers and hovering, waiting for an opportunity to shop alone, expect to draw attention. Act this way while picking out onions and people will think "Why is this person being strange about onions? What exactly do they want to do with it? I should call the manager!" This effect is amplified by unusual appearance. It goes the other way, too, of course. Your confidence inspires comfort in others. Walk up in full boy mode + skirt and happily start flipping through the ladies clearance rack. You probably won't get a second glance.

My philosophy: We tend to make up stories for strangers as we observe them; our brains do this to rationalize and make sense of our world. Live in your own story, and others will pick up on it. If you dwell on what other people's stories about you might be, then you will likely find yourself living those stories instead of your own.

[GenderCurious Andrea]

I went bra shopping for my wife at Victoria Secret once in drab it was Valentine's day and nobody questioned me and the sales associates were very helpful. I have been thinking of going back with the same story only for me this time. My wife used to work there and she gave me a personal bra fitting at home so getting sized isn't a issue but sizing your self isn't to hard.

[Dalva]

My ex used to work in the shoe section of a national dept store chain. For the first couple of week she would come home and joke about the trans gendered customers. It didn't take long for her to realise these ladies were adding to her commission.

In other words, I think many SA's don't even bother looking at the customer, rather they look at the potential increase in their paycheque.

[brassieres]

I always wondered what SA's think.

Lexi,I only know of one Rainbows location, lol!

[Launa]

Not "Oh isn't that _nice ... he's buying bras for his wife" or "He must have lost a bet"! Lol

Yep, this is exactly what they're thinking!

Now if your shopping at this time of the year then the SA's are thinking that your wife thought it would be a good idea that you dress as a woman for a Halloween party you will both attend!