Changes on the Horizon

[Aly Cat]

Well, I applied for financial aid tonight. I was granted the maximum amount possible for the pell grant. On my next day off, I have to contact the colleges and apply for classes. This is a major change for me as I will be moving out of the house and into my own place after the holidays. Not sure when the wife and I will be filing for divorce but I will be living on my own and plan on living as a woman about 80% of the time unless work allows me to there as well. Going to school though, it will be en femme as well be my off time with friends. I am out to everyone now and am free to be me...well, soon that is. I plan on getting my year of living as a woman in as early as possible so that whenever I do start going to therapy, the first major step is done. Then at that point it's just a matter of the therapists signing off on me being allowed to continue the transition. Life is going to be dramatically changing in the upcoming months. It's all very exciting but at the same time scary. I haven't lived as a bachelor/bachelorette for 10+ years. At least I have friends and family as a support group...Oh, and of course you ladies.

[Rhonda Darling]

Eva, wow! Good for you. Sounds like you're entering a very exciting stage in your life . . . . and doing so with a wonderful attitude and with having cleared out of the way a lot of roadblocks that stand in the way of others.

Of course your support and fan base here will want frequent posts and to know how things are going - the good, the bad, and the really good!

Happy day.

Rhonda

[Aly Cat]

I will definitely keep you all up to date with progress and all the changes along with pictures etc. I am not making and changes until after the holiday season though so that the kids get one final normal Christmas before everything becomes different. Also, if I can't get into school soon enough, I'll have to go in the spring. That will also give the wife(ex) a chance to get organized and situated with jobs and all that. She hasn't had a job in 10 years so she is scrambling to get things in order. I don't want to just throw her out there like that. Not to mention, the house she is going to be living in is under my name so that will have to get situated as well. We still have lots of things to get in order but as long as progress is being made, I'm happy. I don't dislike my wife(ex) and wish her the best. I want her to succeed in whatever she does, not just for her but for the support of the kids. She is a wonderful person, just not the right wonderful person for me. I hold no animosity towards her and I hope she feels the same for me. I want this to be as non dramatic and traumatic as possible for everyone involved. It's definitely a new chapter in both our lives.

[Amy R Lynn]

Wow! That is a lot of changes on the Horizon. You sound so happy about all of it. I wish you the best of luck with all of it Hun! And do keep us ladies updated.

[Aly Cat]

I am very happy about 75% of it. The other percent makes me very sad indeed because it involves me losing my children. They hold a very large part in my heart that cannot be replaced by anything. Only time will tell if I am allowed any rights to them.

[Maria in heels]

Eva...very courageous and congratulations on the grant! I hope that everything works out, and always remember, the kids are yours too. Only you can choose to part ways with them...

[SarahSerene]

Eva, first, I agree with what Maria says regarding the kids. Second, going forward, I am very excited for you! The world is changing rapidly, both for trans people and just in general. Go forth with courage and confidence! I look forward to hearing about more adventures - I feel a little adrenaline in my heart just thinking the big steps you are making.

[Beverley Sims]

Eva,
That sort of commitment is a whole new ball game and I wish you every success.
That first twelve months is generally the "longest year".

[Marcelle]

Hi Eva,

Good luck on your journey as you move forward with transitioning.

Hugs

Isha

[kimdl93]

Sorry your marriage did t survive these big changes, but I'm glad that you're able to reset your life, retain friends and family and get an education. Best wishes for a great future!

[Aly Cat]

Thank you all for your support. I will do what I can with my children, even if it's just talking on the phone with them or skyping them. I will be living an hour and a half away so I won't be able to just pop in...nor would I be allowed to I think. The biggest thing is that I be allowed to maintain some connection there. As for this upcoming year, you're right Beverly. This will probably be the longest year. I don't know what life is going to be like. I do know that having a support system and friends who care about me will help a lot. Not to mention, I will be insanely busy with school. I can't wait! I feel like one foot is going in front of the other and I am finally making progress with my life now. Last night my father sent me a rather long email that somewhat broke me heart. It wasn't all about me dressing, but more so about my marriage failing and how I'm the third child to have a broken family and that they are starting to feel like failures. I tried to explain that every person walks their own path and no one, not even the parents get to choose that path for them. Free will is a tricky thing. I also got to touch on a more sensitive subject of me potentially transitioning. They don't fully know that part of my decisions yet. Or didn't. Now at least my dad has an idea. I didn't flat out say that I was going to start hormones or anything but that I wasn't sure if I would be allowed to see my kids as I "became more feminine." So he has an idea of what I want for my life. I love my parents very much and to see this hurting then is very tough. It's a catch 22. I don't want to see them hurting but I'm the one causing the pain. To stop that pain means to cause my own pain and be someone I'm not. My dad did say that I will always be welcome in their house and that they would never leave me out on the doorstep no matter if im dressed as a guy or a woman. Very big progress but I know they are still hurting over all this. Does that part get any easier? Did anyone else have a similar situation happen? What did you do?

[Barbra P]

Hi Eva

I have read a few of your recent threads but I went back and read some more of the threads you started. I was looking for some mention that you have met with a Therapist and I didn’t find any such reference. There has been a number of changes made to the WPATH-SOC, one of which pertains to the Real Life Experience (RLE). I was told by my Therapist that the RLE requirement would be waived if I wanted to begin HRT, provided my Doctor determined there was no medical reason to avoid HRT. I could start as soon as my Doctor put through a referral for me to an Endocrinologist. I was referred to my Therapist by my Doctor when I told her I had some gender issues, so my Therapist knew about my crossdressing before I even met her for the first time.

I have to admit I don’t know anything about how things are in and around Atlanta, I live in Southern California and my health insurance is provided by one of the largest HMOs. I just received my guide of services offered for 2014 and I see that SRS has been added.

I had a friend who went on HRT and changes started to appear quickly, both physical and emotional. She took early retirement after less than a year on HRT and is now living full time as a woman. Robin belonged to the same HMO that I belong to and told her Therapist that she wanted to start HRT and her Therapist agreed after only a few sessions.

I started swapping PM’s with a forum member living in the Phoenix area (AZ) in mid-2011. He was very much in the closet and felt that if his secret got out it would ruin his career in law enforcement. At the time he had just told his Wife about his crossdressing, although he hadn’t really dressed much. She took him shopping at the Dress Barn and bought him some clothes. The Pink Fog didn’t creep in on kitten paws, it was more a Tsunami. Last month, September, Stephanie report to work as the newest Phoenix Police Department’s female officer. Unfortunately the marriage didn't make it.

[Aly Cat]

Oh wow. Well that is good news for sure. I thought I was going to have to go through all the RLE stuff first beefier I could do anything. I'm sure that GA is like CA since it is one of the major hubs in the transgender community in the country. There are a lot of srs facilities here as well as the southern comfort conference. I do need to get into some official therapy though which I plan to do when I move out. I think it will help me a lot. Thanks for the info! That makes me happy!

[xdressed]

Sounds like you've got a lot of things to get through, but you're meeting it with confidence and the right attitude, good luck ^_^

[BLUE ORCHID]

Hi Eva, You sound like a lady with a plan.