Are you attracted to the same women you want to be?

[Phydelia]

This question is for the autogynephiliacs, crossdreamers, "male lesbians', and others who are attracted to women, but also wish/fantasize about being one. i thought it might offend the TS ladies, so i put it here even though i know it won't apply to everyone.

Is the "type" of woman that you're most attracted to also the type that you feel most jealous of/imagine yourself being?

The reason i ask is that i thought it would seem intuitive for the two women to be the same- why wouldn't you want to be the type of woman you're most attracted to? It would make sense that if you're internalizing/projecting your desires (depending on how you look at it), the desires would be the same in both cases.

However, in my case, at least, it's not. The woman i want to be, that i'm jealous of, is extremely petite; 5'0", 90#. Blonde or pastel-dyed hair. Fresh-faced. In her early 20's. Dressed very "girly".

The women that i'm most attracted to are softer, heavier, taller, older; even their hair is a different color- black, red, or dyed to a jewel tone. They're made up and dressed Gothic. In short, they wouldn't even seem to occupy the same circles as the girl i long to be.

i'm just wondering if this disconnect is shared with any of my "sisters", or if i'm simply an oddity among an already rare subculture.

Does your "dream girl" match your "dream self"?

[Allesandra Rhodes]

No. I have a very clear picture of who I am as a woman and whom I'm attracted to. Honestly I'm a real bitch, yet I'm attracted to the complete opposite. If that makes sense.

[Steph_CD_62]

I would say that my "dream girl" does NOT match my "dream self".

When I see myself dressed up, I see a typical female of average weight for my age that enjoys the feeling of different fabrics against my body. I love the look and feel of nice lingerie. I stand at 6'

My dream girl is my wife. She only stands 5'4" and is a little over weight. She prefers wearing jeans/sweats and a t-shirt. I can not remember the last time she wore any type of lingerie. She likes to wear her cotton panties & bra.

[Pinky188]

No. I am in a very serious relationship with a girl that is, in most ways, very different than me. We share the same tast in music but fashion, not so much.

[Audrey_FR]

No. I didn't picture myself like the women I'm attracted to. With a little exception, I see my wife as the most beautiful person around. I observe what she wears and how she wears it but I fully know that´s won't look the same on me.

[Beverley Sims]

I thought Sabrina and Dolly Parton once.
Stayed at Twiggys B&B in Penzance, but when I think back I would never have made the cut.
I did present well with what I have and it was better than all three mentioned beforehand.

[Rachelakld]

While I would be attracted to a female who looks a bit like me, I'm also attracted to lots of females, especially ones that smile a lot

[Stephanie47]

Funny I thought I would find a tall long legged blond woman with blue eyes. I was in my young years a tall (6'2") blond with long legs and green eyes. So, who do I marry? A short (5'2") brunette. Well, she does have blue eyes! Now, I'm a well dressed (always dresses), tastefully dressed, grey haired woman.

[EnglishBeth]

Have to say that I think that a lot of women will have features I would like to have, but doesn't follow that I'm attracted to them. By the same token, I wouldn't say that I'm attracted to any one type, although I do like a nice smile.

[Amanda M]

For me, no. My female persona is quite different to my ideal woman, who is, in fact, my wife!

[Vickie_CDTV]

For the most part yes, I certainly dress like the women I am most attracted to. I like women who are taller and older than I am, so obviously I can't look exactly like the women I am most attracted to. I certainly try to emulate women I find attractive though.

[Kate Simmons]

First of all I'm not jealous of anyone and that does not influence the type of women I'm attracted to. I love intelligent women who are stimulating conversationalists but who are also romantic. Each is their own unique individual self and that what makes them special to me. I can do no less in my own projection of femininity.

[Lisa Gerrie]

When I was young, I wanted to emulate the physical appearance of the girls and young women that I was attracted to, sexually and socially. That was "female" to me.

The older I got, the less that was true. At 57 I find myself driven to emulate myself, if I'd been born a girl. I look a lot like my mother, kinda plain, and I am happiest and most content when dressed in everyday clothing that fits my (padded) body comfortably.

[NicoleScott]

If "attracted to" means physically or sexually attracted to, yes. I am physically (or maybe I mean superficially) attracted to pretty and shapely women who wear short skirts and high heels, heavy but perfectly applied makeup with bold eyes and lips and long painted nails. I'll never have the feminine pretty face and great shape of a female, but my goal in transforming is way over-the-top.
But if "attracted to" means choosing a woman to be a partner in all of life, no, I want someone who is more like I am in guy mode: laid-back, responsible, and conservative.
I guess I'm attracted to an angel outside the bedroom but who becomes a painted lady inside.

[Robbin_Sinclair]

Spinning off the old Marine Corps commercial, I dress as the woman who I can be.

I am attracted to most women. My perfect woman, if there is such a thing for me, is like my wife. Rather petite, older, smart and long hair....very long.

Trying to be a person on a spiritual path, I would like to think that I'm not jealous of anyone. That falls into greed and things I'm not prone to. Trying to be a person in a program, I recognize that I have resentments against some men, especially alpha males. That's fear, competition or anger based.

robbin

[Marcelle]

I can't really say I am trying to be any particular type of woman. I am just trying to present as female as I can possibly be. As such, I don't have a type in mind when I dress. I play to my strengths (which aren't many) and suit my hair and style to my face, colour and frame.

So if I was attracted to the type of woman I am . . . God help me

Hugs

Isha

[Amy Lynn3]

Nope, can't say I would want to be the women I am attracted to. I would say...if I could take parts of all the different women and make my ideal woman I would be attracted to her.

[Allison Quinn]

Nope o3o
The way my girlfriend dresses and acts is a complete 180 to the way I dress and our personalities are quite different :P
I couldn't date anybody who is just like me that would make things get too boring too quickly xD

Plus with different styles we can both give each other honest opinions on when some clothes or colors just look silly with each other as we have no bias toward the outfit :P

[Donna St. Marten]

I think so. I try very hard to wear age appropriate outfits and present a classy appearance.

[Cynthia Anne]

I would say yes! 'Cause I am attracted to beautiful women!!!

[Jenniferathome]

When I present as female, it is in the style that I would find attractive in a woman.

[Alice Torn]

Yes. like Vickie. I dress as the older tall, leggy lady, with a bit of silver or gray hair, but i am attracted to small petite ladies, and all sizes, too, but at six foot six, i dress as the tall dream lady i have seen, but , as a lifetime bachelor, could never get close to. So, i am that lady in the mirror, or photos.

[sabrinayeah]

I guess so.. I try to replicate the physical qualities of other women i find attractive.. hair.. make up.. outfits. to bad i can't date my self! ha ha ha.. i had an old girlfriend once yell at me after a wig purchase "YOU BOUGHT HAIR LIKE MINE!" I couldn't tell if she was flattered or angry. but since then I've let my hair grown long.. as for some of my 'girl' friends, yes I would love to be them because they are amazing people with open minds and awesome personalities beyond just their appearance

[Karren H]

My wife the jeans lover..... I think that i try to be everything she isn't.... so apparently not....

[julia marie]

I can see why some respondents here present very differently from their wives/SOs. There's something to be said for taking a different path. For me, I find that the styles that I like also show up on women that I find attractive (some mix of business and casual. So, now that it's fall in the north, sweaters, jeans/casual skirt and boots work. Summer, light skirts and bright tops. But, all sort of girl next store stuff.) Women in those combinations will turn my head, AND make me want to shop. In terms of physical appearance, I'll never be 5'2" and 95 pounds, so I can't model myself after those ladies anyway.