Back in the nineties, when AOL was going strong and they started a dating section, I put up two identical ads, one that mentioned crossdressing, and one that didn't. The 'straight' ad got plenty of responses during the time I had it up and running. The one that mentioned crossdressing, well, there were 23 million AOL'ers, and out of that, I got only a few responses. Prostitutes offering their services, and guys looking for sex. And one woman in England who thought it would be fun to dress me up. At least, she said she was a woman, I'll never really know. That's it. Out of all those people. One.
I've had ads up on Match, Loveaccess, OKCupid, Plentyoffish, alt.com, bondage.com, collarme.com, and a few others I can't even remember anymore. The pattern repeats itself. Prostitutes/callgirls/dominatrix's, and men looking for sex. Virtually no women. The few that I did contact, it was clear that they didn't really like the idea, but were trying to appear willing to put up with it probably because they were such wretched souls that no other man would want them. One was a drug addict who seemed to be making things up as she went along in discussion, the other, a bipolar alcoholic. neither was in the least bit attractive physically. Out of curiosity, I did visit one of the dominatrixes. She was quite nice, after I had explained my situation. But she was strictly professional about it, and insisted that if I wanted to continue to see her, I would have to be one of her slaves, and in addition, it would cost me $1000 a month. And, there would be no physical contact with her.
So the odds of finding someone in the online dating world seem on par with winning the lottery; virtually impossible if you state the crossdressing up front. After 15 years of that, I decided that I would simply have to try another way if I was to ever date again at all. So it's back to the drawing board. I quit actively crossdressing last may. Since then, I've gone out with a few women, but so far, there's no one I really get along with, and that doesn't even include the crossdressing issue. I'd forgotten how difficult it was to meet a good woman. I did study all the dating tricks for the past ten or so years, read all the dating guru books and videos. Still, it's very difficult. It's become much easier to meet women, but meeting one you want to date? That is still difficult. And even then, the crossdressing 'demon' still has to be dealt with.
The bottom line is, of the few women out there in the world that are attracted to crossdressers, they know what a rare person they are and have their pick of the most financially successful crossdressers out there. For the average crossdresser, well, the odds are we'll be alone for the rest of our lives. It's a bleak outlook. There is nowhere to look. The only online crossdresser dating site is inhabited nearly entirely by men. And as all the men list themselves as female, you can't search the profiles for women, as a search will show about 400 males in that search for every GG. Then you have the fake profiles, to get guys like us to pay for the membership so we can try to contact those GG's. Until you pay for your membership, you will get messages of interest supposedly from some quite attractive GG's who have a profile up on the site. But you can't respond to them unless you're a paying member. So, you pay up, and write back to those women that you got a message from. Then.....either they never respond, or say that they never wrote to you in the first place. If you do search for GG's, and write to them, you either get no answer or a polite 'no thanks'. Most of the GG profiles go up and come down with regularity. I finally spotted a ringer, a profile with a picture that I was sure I'd seen before. Sure enough, it was a stock photo used in another advertisement.
Edit: I think it was about four or five years ago, there was a group of predators hunting us. A crossdresser was contacted online, I can't remember for sure if it was match or POF. But a woman contacted him, and when he went to meet her, her friends yelled at him that he was a pervert and then proceeded to beat him up so badly that he wound up in intensive care. It wound up in the news.
Originally Posted by Tracii G
