How do i develop my female persona.

[Megan.]

Hi it's megan i hope you can help me with this i have decided to go to a cd meeting group in january but i dont know how to act femanine around people i just want to be recognised as a woman not as a man in a dress any advice would be great megan

[Cheryl T]

Just relax and be yourself. Let Megan come out and grow. Others have been there and will help you become yourself.
If you try to be feminine you will exaggerate so just let it flow.

[katssun]

Honestly? Just make it up.

Chin up, chest out, shoulders back, elbows close to the side. Take smaller steps, one in front of the other. Imagine graceful in your head. As Cheryl said, don't over do it, by trying too hard.

And don't forget to smile.

[mfggurl]

I'm just starting, personally. I have so much to learn and unlearn.

[Karren H]

No way your going to develop a fem persona in a few weeks.... best you can hope to do is don't do anything overtly masculine while dressed enfemme......

[Marcelle]

I am going to go with Cheryl on this one . . . just relax and let Megan shine through. If this is a support group they have all been where you are now and will accept you regardless. The other advice I can offer is people watch. I spend a lot of time observing women (in a discreet non-creepy manner that is) going about their daily business. This has provided me with insight on mannerisms, gestures, walk, interaction etc. You may want to try that but word of advice don't stare too intently especially if you are in guy mode as it can come off as a bit creepy.

Hugs

Isha

[Tina_gm]

I see this type of thought or effort so often on here. If anything, I would think that some on here probably try way too hard. I have always been a person who is a people watcher. When I began to come to grips and accept this side of myself, I also began noticing what the differences are between men and women in general. In reality, they are quite subtle, most of the time. Of course, there is a big difference between a runway model and a lumberjack, but just watching the average guy and average girl in a store or restaurant, the differences are actually quite subtle.

That you Megan, or anyone else on here for that matter that is striving to achieve "acting" like a woman, that is indeed the word... acting. If someone has a desire to wear women's clothing, there is a feminine side in there. It just needs to do its thing. I would suggest for anyone, stop trying or acting, and just be. On many occasions, I have had people notice that I have done things in a feminine way without me making any attempt to do so. Nothing over the top, just subtleties but being that I have a feminine side it will and does come out.

I suppose if someone wants to blend in out in public, there are certain ways in which a person can refine their mannerisms. But in general, and I would think especially in a CD group setting, (I could be wrong, I have never been to one) I would think, and certainly hope that they would be accepting of you without you being 100% feminine.

[Rachelakld]

Over the years, I have let Rachel grow as any child will grow with time, she has her way of doing things and Randy has his way of doing things

[Beverley Sims]

Go as a man in a dress, do make yourself up, wear a wig and look respectable others you meet will give you all the help you desire.
You will not be alone, I assure you.

[Marsha My Dear]

Hi Meghan, we all conduct ourselves according to the behaviours we have learned- including how to conduct ouselves as male in society. Just as Gendermutt does, I discreetly watch who women carry themselves in public. Then, in private, I try to learn how to comport myself as a woman does. It's easy to overdo. Practice, practice, practice until it gets to be second nature. Then there's the flip side of avoiding it when not en femme!

[MsVal]

I cannot answer your specific question Meghan, but I can suggest that you begin by finding a role model, analyzing what makes her desirable, and incorporate those characteristics that you are able.

[Eryn]

While we can all do a caricature of femininity I think we really learn to be feminine the same way that GGs do, by watching, imitating, and making mistakes. There is no single model of femininity and a tall GG will walk and hold herself differently than an average GG or a short GG.

Start with something simple, like softening your voice and resonating in the nasal cavity, not the chest. Smile a lot. Slow down and forget being rushed. These simple actions will put you in the right frame of mind and make you receptive to acquiring other mannerisms that GGs exhibit.

Watch and learn from real GGs in public. Imitating a model's runway walk will not help you blend. Real GGs don't clomp along like some men, but they don't sashay or mince along either unless they are advertising or heel-restricted. Walking in a skirt or on heels is a learning experience and you'll learn how just as GGs do, through practice.

Observe how GGs carry their bags. Carrying a shoulder bag in male mode goes a long way toward helping you handle a bag gracefully in female mode.

Like I said, take small steps. You don't learn it all at once even if you would like to. After a while you'll just find yourself falling into the gender you are presenting.

[Daphne Renee]

GGs are all different. Some are more feminine than others. Just be yourself. Your feminine self will come out in time. Just try to enjoy yourself. I dont have any scientific evidence to back this up but it does seem that in a group setting people will start to act somewhat alike. So maybe you could try to hang out with more GG's. Everyone can offer suggestions but in the end you have decide what works for you

[Tina_gm]

Just remember that it is mostly subtleties and you may likely already have them. I do. For me, in certain circumstances (work, friend and family gatherings, kids) I try to keep those at bay. I naturally have tendencies to talk more with my hands. My walk is sometimes a "feminine" walk. Sit back and watch the average men and women in everyday settings. It really is little things. And if you watch closely, you will also see a lot of men and a lot of women who will sometimes make feminine or masculine gestures and walk and everything else. A lot of GG's on here know this, and have said things about how what the average woman wears and does in everyday settings is far from what a lot of CDers wear and attempt to emulate. If that is what you are after, just the everyday stuff, you are likely a lot closer already than you think. And probably it is just a matter of letting it go and it will probably come to you. You may already be doing some of these things and not even know it. Many times I have done something in a feminine type of mannerism and not even known I was or was trying to do. Someone would make a comment here and there. Now, when I am alone, or with my wife, I just let myself do whatever it is I do without any effort. According to my wife, I act girly at times. It is not consistent, and there are ways which I am more girly than other ways which I am not. That is just me.

[julia marie]

Take little steps. As others have said, it won't happen in a few weeks. But, definitely watch how women walk (not the model on runway walk) and communicate. Pick up little bits and don't worry about having everything perfect right away. Be comfortable. You'll be with friends.

[Kate Simmons]

It's been said but the absolute best thing to do is just be yourself.