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Thread: Went out to meet others for the first time

  1. #1
    Member Jesse Six's Avatar
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    Went out to meet others for the first time

    I took a big personal step - I went out to a trans community gathering last night.

    There were people of every stripe there, trans women and men, some very far down the road and considering surgery, many on hormones, some still exploring dressing and some in drab. I introduced myself in the 'questioning' category.

    It was awesome. We talked late into the night, probably 4h+, on just about every topic. The atmosphere was phenomenal, and I felt like I met a whole bunch of kindred spirits.

    Not knowing what to expect, I was in drab. I had on a bit of eyeliner and nailpolish mostly for my own motivation. However, seeing all the brave people in dress (who admitted to being nervous too, lol!) I'm really getting the guts up to go dressed next time.
    "Your hands are cold but your lips are warm..."

  2. #2
    Gone to live my life
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    Hi Jesse,

    It sounds like you had a great time and congrats on your first foray out into the community. Hopefully there will be more.

    Hugs

    Isha

  3. #3
    Member Jessica Keys's Avatar
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    Good for you.
    At least you had the guts to start anyways.
    Out here where I am I have to travel a 150 miles for such group meetings.
    After a couple of times doing that I found such a small crowd of us that dressed I felt unsafe and on display for the sex only seekers I never went back again.
    Sure not saying I am Lilly white but I like my own time and place and not standing with the girls at a bar and have a hand come up under my dress.

  4. #4
    Pretty in Pink Barbie Anne's Avatar
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    Happy for you hon. It'll get easier as you go on
    Barbie

  5. #5
    Full Geek Status Adriana Moretti's Avatar
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    good for you....yes! it takes guts just to get out the front door to attend something like that....baby steps right

  6. #6
    Senior Member MsVal's Avatar
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    That was a big step Jesse, one of many more to come.

    Never having done such a thing, it's a bit cheeky for me to advise anyone, so I won't. But if I were to advise it would be to go dressed in your best. (Go big or go home.)

    The first of anything is hard to forget but you don't want the next one to be second place.

    Jealously yours,

    Best wishes
    MsVal

  7. #7
    New Member Mary Lou's Avatar
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    Good for you..

  8. #8
    Member Jesse Six's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jessica Keys View Post
    standing with the girls at a bar
    To be clear, this was a support group with a moderator, in a glbt community centre, not a bar type scene. They try to keep the gawkers out.

    There was no sleaze. I loved it. I'm walking on air today.
    "Your hands are cold but your lips are warm..."

  9. #9
    Gold Member Jaylyn's Avatar
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    I truly think that if I were in a big town and had a meeting like that one I might be in attendance.... I think that it would be great to meet others in a safe place with all having kindred thoughts. I would enjoy the conversations on some questions that would be raised. Oh wait a minute we do that here...... Lol now if there's a way we all could meet and feel what Jesse felt about being being safe with no gawkers and every one being just a smidgin nervous....
    Glad for you Jesse keep on keeping on.

  10. #10
    Member Michellegryl's Avatar
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    Congrat's Jesse on your first foray into the community outside and meeting others who understand. I am happy for you that you have found a support group where you feel safe and validated. I remember my first night out like it was yesterday It was one of the best days of my life. Keep it up and each time will get easier and more fulfilling.

    Hugs
    Michelle

  11. #11
    Banned Spammer
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    Thats great Jesse I'm proud of you.
    The first meeting is a tough one but as you saw nothing to be afraid of.
    My group is full of nice people there to help you and not there for a hook up.We meet at a GLSO pride center as well.
    I think the people that seem to think these meetings are a free for all orgy are too scared to go and thats their excuse not to go.
    I have gone to three different groups and all were fantastic people just there to help.

  12. #12
    Lisa Allisa's Avatar
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    Good for you. I remember my first group meeting, it took me about 10 minutes to just get out of the car. I too went in male mode the first time but every other Saturday night I was dressed to the "9's. Helped me tons to be accepted by others. My group was held in a medical facility so no" unwanted" types allowed. It's been a long time since I've gone but now are looking for maybe another group near home but who knows?. Good luck on your new path and we are all here for you.

    Bye-Bye Lisa
    "you are a strange species and there are many out there;shall I tell you what I find beautiful about you ,you are at your best when things are at their worst" ...[ Starman]
    It may of course be a bit disturbing to sense that one is really not so firmly anchored to the gender one was born into.

  13. #13
    Platinum Member
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    Good for you! I know I sound like an echo, but seriously, I'm glad you got out first of all, and glad that you learned we are all nervous the first few times we venture out
    Remember always that you not only have the right to be an individual, you have an obligation to be one.

    Eleanor Roosevelt

  14. #14
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    Sounds great! Good for you.
    Love KristyE

  15. #15
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Jesse,
    As you found out everyone else has similar feelings about being "out".
    Glad it was a positive evening for you.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  16. #16
    Just a touch of class Lynn Marie's Avatar
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    Congratulations on making a positive move towards making friends in the CD community. Having CD girlfriends is absolutely delightful. Be sure to dress up next time. The sound of your heels clicking on the sidewalk is about as erotic as it gets. Ask around about "safe" places to go after the meeting, etc. Being out and about with girlfriends is simply fabulous.

  17. #17
    Living in CD Heaven Helen Grandeis's Avatar
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    Glad you got out! Many venues have a changing place on site.
    Best Wishes for Personal Peace & Happiness
    -
    Helen Grandeis

  18. #18
    Senior Member Bria's Avatar
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    Jesse, I'm glad you were able o get out to the meeting, the next one will be easier, I know this because I've been out twice to Hamburger Mary's twas a little scario meet with other girls. It was a little scary the first time, but very exileratingy also. The second time out was a lot of fun and I'm looking forward to going again this week.

    Dress however you are confortable, but go and enjoy the company!

    Hugs Bria

  19. #19
    Member HelenR2's Avatar
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    I recently met some other dressers for the first time and for anybody who is considering doing this but feeling nervous about it I can tell you that once there it all felt very relaxed and completely normal. I'm going again in a couple of weeks and this time I will put a bit more effort in with my appearance to hopefully match the others. One girl said something quite important. She said that she was afraid that if she tried too hard others might feel she was over-dressed but, of course, they were as friendly and accepting as you would hope them to be.

  20. #20
    Senior Member Suzanne F's Avatar
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    Congratulations on meeting other ladies! It has really made my life richer since I began meeting others from this site and support groups. It has made my transition into being public easier. I am now independent enough to be out in my own but i still love joining others out in the world. My wife and i are going to a Rivercity Gems function this weekend.
    Suzanne

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