Do you ever just want to scream ?

[Lexi Moralas]

Some times I just want to scream ! Some times being a CD All alone inside my head really weights on a girl. As much as I've shares with my un- approving SO. Even as much as I share with you girls there is just so much I keep close and secret. That I've never really shared with anyone. Not even my therapist. What I share is a small peek at things. Once you share information you no longer control it. So I only share what I've told my SO just incase manages to come across it some how or another. But some times I just want to get it out and just tell someone the whole story in every detail just to get it off my chest. I never thought I would want or need to do that but when I was seeing a therapist it felt so good just to tell her what I did. At the time I controlled what I shared because my So and I saw the same person separately and together. So I only shared as much as I had to because I still don't want anyone in to know and it was real hard for me to even to say " I'm a cross dresser " out loud to some one face to face. And I still avoid the topic with my so as much as possible. I don't know if it's because I've always considered my fem side a separate person almost I don't know but now I am rambling. (Sorry) but I just think it would relieving to just confide in some one with all the thoughts that rattle around in my head.
Dose any one else experience moments like these ? Or am I just totally nuts lol
Thanks for listening girls TTYL. LEXI

[Cindy J Angel]

Yes we or should I say I . Would like to scream right now. Knowing I have to get undress. For me its like I cant get girly enuff. Thats my scream. I have been comeing out more and more .

[kimdl93]

Your therapist probably knows you are holding back. I can tell you from personal experience that holding back, the illusion of control, is part of the problem. Next session begin to open up. You'll feel better.

[Kate Simmons]

Look to build up your confidence to share your feelings with someone who has proven they won't betray your trust. A close friend usually fits that bill as they care for you no matter what.

[Jenelle]

I know how you feel. I have an extremely supportive GF but I still want to come out to my friends and family. I am just not ready to take that step. As for holding back with your therapist, IMO you shouldn't. I know that is easier said than done but they are there for you. If you truly feel you cannot trust your therapist it might be time to find a new one.

[Katey888]

Lexi - you're not nuts, dear...

We're all individuals, all unique, and we all have a way to deal or not deal with things that go on inside us.. Sometimes it's good and useful to open up on some things, other times - and other stuff - not necessarily... I don't think so.. Although it always feels it would be nice to get it out there, I think sometimes that's just a feeling - when the time's right, you'll feel it's right...

Try not to be convinced that someone else will know when that time is right for you...

And if you need to scream - stick your face in a pillow and give it that good old primal scream thing (just not when the cat's around..) - It really does help!

Katey x

[PaulaQ]

Lexi, you really should share your feelings with your therapist. She's bound by law to not reveal them. I think you'll feel heaps better honey.

[Trinity Sue]

Sister,
Believe me we all have wanted to scream . I started when it was totally not excepted . Watching and sneaking around praying not be caught . Wanting to share it with someone but totally unsure if they would except it. Then when I was caught , I was sent to a therapist , I said it was just a one time thing. I was scared ,two months into therapy I finally spoke of my cross dressing , we talked and the weight I carried was lifted. I still concealed my cross dressing but felt a lot better about it. There was nothing ever said to my Mother and it was dropped. I have screamed a few times since. The world is nuts, we are just the Roses !!

[Beverley Sims]

Lexi,
I know some need to vent, but it is the big problems that make me want to scream.

Laddering a new pair of stockings, unable to do a bra up because of defective hooks and button holes made too small for the buttons.