My family and friends were surprisingly supportive of me when I came out to them as transgender last year. I was really overjoyed about this, obviously, because so many of us lose everyone.

However, I've noticed that over the past 10 months, as I've transitioned, and changed in so many ways, their acceptance of me seems to be fading. My mother, my sons, and my friends don't really know me anymore. (My sister, fortunately, just gets it and is my best ally.) They are unwilling to talk about what I'm going through, or who I am now. I don't think they much like who I am, either, to the extent they know about it.

When I was Scott, I was this really nice guy, conservative, friendly, a little reserved. I was an old married guy - straight as they come. My marriage was happy, and they kind of held it up as a model of how to have a successful marriage. I liked technology, astronomy, gaming. I was pretty passionate about my job. Nobody understood it - other than it had something to do with 3D graphics, but I'd been doing it for 20 years. I didn't change much over time - I was really a very consistent person. They knew who I was.

Now? I'm a trans woman. I'm still nice - actually I'm a lot nicer than I used to be, and a lot more willing to help others. I'm outgoing, kind of liberal (if only because the politics of conservatives in my state hate LGBT folks). I'm divorcing my wife. I'm queer, and I live in, and am immersed in queer culture here in Dallas. I don't have much interest in the things that I used to do - they were largely complex distractions to keep my mind off my GD. I talk about changing careers now. I'm in relationships in the trans community.

I think that last part really bothers most of them a lot. If I were a nice little straight girl, who'd waited a year or two after my divorce and then met a really nice guy, lived in the suburbs, and otherwise appeared as heteronormative as it's possible for one of us to seem, I think they'd have an easier time dealing with my transition. Unfortunately, none of those things are remotely close to being true about me. (Sometimes I wish they were - but heteronormative was my old life, not my current one.)

The bottom line seems to be that I'm queer, and they hate it. They won't tell me that. They are unwilling to talk about any of this stuff - it's painful for them, so visiting my Mom or my kids doesn't leave a whole lot to talk about, at least about me. I can talk about them all day long. But they really don't want to seem to get to know me.

At this point, I am pretty sure I've lost both of my sons, at least for a while. Possibly forever. Hopefully they'll be supportive to their mom, my (soon to be) ex-wife. My mom loves me, in her way, but it's a way that doesn't seem to want to encompass any of the realities of who I am now, except for very superficial ones. She'll buy me girl stuff, but she HATES my life - it's just obvious looking at her face and listening to what she says when I talk to her about it.

My friends - lol - they just can't deal with me at all, for the most part. (There's one exception there too, but for the most part, we don't have too much in common anymore, except for a shared history.)

Has anyone else gone through something like this? How'd it go? Did you get any of them back over time?

I'm sad about this - but I've watched it happening for a while now, and really, it seems to be beyond my control. I don't have any way to change how they feel. I'll be OK, but I certainly miss them. Things don't always change for the better, though.