I really cant stand the term "drag queen"... the mental image it draws for me is just so far off from how i actually want to be. I get what youre saying though
I really cant stand the term "drag queen"... the mental image it draws for me is just so far off from how i actually want to be. I get what youre saying though
In all fairness, drag queen is simply an entertainer. It's not meant to be derogatory or anything. It's like people who may not understand sports who might say getting a touchdown in football is a home run. Many people are ignorant of the terminology (and honestly, we have too much of it in this corner of society as it is: crossdresser, drag queen, genderqueer, pangender, genderfluid, transgender, bigender, agender, it goes on and on).
Hey Kayla,
Totally understand where you are coming from. As people around this forum can attest to, there were 1000 baby steps forward followed by 999 steps back to where I am today, and that is still not comfortable in my own skin.
Advice from your post is as typical rock solid, from attitude , to hints on to venture out. Here is my 2 cents.
1. As Isha says, venture out to a different town to where you live and/or work. This greatly reduces the odds of getting spotted by someone you know, therefore gives you more confidence in your demeanor, making you less conspicuous
2. It summer time, hidden in plain site works best, go out during the day, wear a pair of shorts and a cute top, and find a nice park to take a stroll.
3. Try to find a transformation studio in your area. First, it will build your confidence, plus it will show you your possibilities. I went to a pro, and learned much about contouring makeup and concealing beard cover that I can never get on you tube. Something about 1:1 that makes it much better.
4. You are 18. I hate you. Looking at your avatar photo, I don't think it will take much other than self confidence to get you where you want to be.
Best of luck. Send me a line anytime I can be of any assistance
Gretch
we are not drag queens girls....... i was just stating i go in to the situation with thier mentality......it is a game i play in my head....i learned alot from drag queens....
a few makeup tricks you would be pleased with what you see in mirror
Carpe Noctem
Cheyenne Hyde
"You may never exceed, your own expectations, of yourself"
http://s46.photobucket.com/user/MsHyde2u/library/
(the password is feminine)
Thank you everyone but i get the feeling you arent really trying to help. In fact some of the private messages iv got have just downright creeped me out. No, im not telling you where i live, im not emailing you pictures so you can "evaluate me" and why would you send me something saying its for makeup and have it redirect to a porn app? what kind of person do you think i am? after all of that im done crossdressing.
I was in your place a few years ago. 6'2", beard shadow, no expertise with makeup, and a farmer tan that wouldn't quit.Originally Posted by KaylaRoxx
I still managed to get out. I taught myself makeup, learned about effective foundation (Cover Girl does not cover boy!) and acquired clothing that was very feminine. I learned about feminine visual cues and never went out without full makeup, nail polish, and femme everything else.
Once out, I realized that I needed to learn about feminine mannerisms and modes of communications and work on my voice. I also had to unlearn masculine habits like nodding at passerbys. Women don't look at passing men and they smile at other women!
With experience the rush of adrenaline went away and was replaced with confidence. I had gone out, I made mistakes, I got "made," and the sky didn't fall in. I began to enjoy myself not because I was simply out, but because I was presenting as I wished. Confidence turned out to be the key to the kingdom. Eventually I found that doing my nails every time wasn't practical so I keep them clear-polished and a bit longer than males generally do. I learned to dress in casual feminine styles so I wasn't overdressed for a particular situation. I even learned how to walk in heels, not because I needed the height but simply because I wanted the style. I started to interact with other people more and found that I was always accepted as I presented. Occasionally I'd overhear someone commenting on me and the comment was always "look how tall that woman is!" Note that they said "woman" which is logical because I'm obviously dressed as one and the general public is not searching for evidence of CDing as some of us do. I've even had people come up to me in public and ask how tall I am. It's just something that should be expected if you are the tallest woman in the room.
I found that being made isn't a major concern if you stay away from seedy places. Being made in a biker bar would be life-threatening. Being made at a Philharmonic concert is no issue at all because people are polite there.
Being recognized is one of my fears as well. My appearance with a wig is considerably different than my male appearance but I'm growing my hair out and pretty soon I won't look much different. Like many CDers, I maintain a "No-Fly zone," a radius around my home where I do not mingle in public dressed. I drive through the zone and have complete freedom outside of it. This isn't a perfect system, but it has worked for me.
Eryn
"These girls have the most beautiful dresses. And so do I! How about that!" [Kaylee, in Firefly] [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
"What do you care what other people think?" [Arlene Feynman, to her husband Richard]
"She's taller than all the women in my family, combined!" [Howard, in The Big Bang Theory]
"Tall, tall girl. The woman could hunt geese with a rake!" [Mary Cooper, in The Big Bang Theory]
Kayla,
Please allow me to apologize for any "raunchies". I am so sorry that there are those kind of people out there.
Don't believe that we are all like that. Most of us really are here to help & support each other
Good luck with quitting.
Friendly Hugs from Connie Marie
I know what you mean, I used to be that way too. If I didn't look 100% female and or attractive it felt like it wouldn't be worth the effort to finish dressing up, go out, or even just CD in the privacy of my own home with plenty of time on my hands. Now if I don't it is usually because I am hot and lazy but still try to put something feminine on, even if just a bra, breast forms and a tank top so at least I go to bed feeling better that I at least wore something.
Kayla,
If you really feel that bad inquire about a private makeover session to see how well you can look.
Even go to one of the specialist makeover services.
It costs but at least you should get an honest opinion.
Work on your elegance,
and beauty will follow.
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