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Thread: Dressing en femme at your wedding

  1. #26
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    My wife and I had a very traditional wedding four decades ago. I thought I had expunged my cross dressing desires years prior to that. If I were to remarry, if my wife passed on, I still would not wear a dress even if she was accepting. At my age I'm content to peruse a website of cross dressers in bridal white. Those beauties make any old man come to his senses.

  2. #27
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    I'm sorry that I got carried away. I'll go as the groom for the wedding. To find an acceptable significant other is fine by me. Anyways I shouldn't be overshadowing the future wife. I was being selfish without realizing it.

    Take care, Nikki

  3. #28
    Aspiring Member Sabrina133's Avatar
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    I got married on the 14th of June. My wife and I were both brides. One of my bridesmaids was a CD. I have been out to my family, friends and at work since January so no issues. If a guess didn't feel comfortable with it, they simply didn't need to come. And yes, my dad walked me down the aisle.

    Bree

  4. #29
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    Hey people, I am getting married in September, We are having a Steampunk Wedding on a farm, it is a 3 day event, we was having two transgendered girls as bridesmaids but my partners family kicked up, even though they know about me, so to keep the peace the two girls are now just coming as guests and we have another bridesmaid. I would dearly love to wear a dress as I have 4 that fit nicely lol... I have a little sideline in making Corpse Bride and Zombie Bride dresses from used and sometimes new wedding dresses... but I bought one the other day which is sooooo nice, a fishtail with a superb ruched body, strapless and champagne in colour. In a size 14 which fits me like a glove!! yeahhh! I will probably wear this one to a private ceremony we are having with our tv friends in a house near where we live... Sarah will probably wear hers again so we will both be in very glamourous dresses... Just letting you know that there are ways and means to outsmart people that dont agree with our ways of thinking, come to think of it we and I have never had any bad comments from anybody, yes I get clocked occasionally but nothing is said. We go shopping, we go on the beach and I do walk in and out of my home dressed. I have been to the local working mens club a few times to a disco and they all want to come up and talk about normal things, there is no awkward moments at all, so what I am saying is go for it, you only live once! or so I am told lol... yes we have changed our wedding to keep the inlaws happy but thats just normal to keep them happy isn't it haha... Steffi

  5. #30
    Senior Member Jennifer in CO's Avatar
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    She wore the white dress, I wore the white tux; but the differences stopped there. She bought us matching trusos for the wedding so that she had on a white lace bra, I had on the same bra. She had on white lace panties, I had on the same lace panties. Continue through the waist nipper, matching garter/hose, and...ok she had on 4" spike heels and I had on white patent flats (she did make me wear the heels later just so I'd know what she did so she could be the same height as me). After the wedding? our going away outfits were also matching...but in a kinky way. Since we changed together post the wedding (and is was dang near 20 degrees outside) our outfits were matching white satin with lace yoke blouses with long chiffon sleeves to satin 4 button cuffs, red bell-bottom slacks (no pockets/side zippers), matching red bra/panties, matching red garter/hose and matching white shoes. Oh...and matching white down coats that covered our tops. It was great at least till we got to the airport and it wasn't 20 degrees anymore...but thats a another story

  6. #31
    mom's "daughter" KarenNY's Avatar
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    My wedding with my wife was very traditional -- me in the black tux, her in the wedding dress. The one difference was I walked her down the aisle -- her father wasn't part of her life at the time, so we had that one departure from tradition. I had done a mock wedding as a bride about 3 years earlier where I wore my full bridal regalia, walked down the aisle and got "married" to a male family friend in a tux, with all the traditional vows, rings and all. So I got that out of my system and wanted to be the groom for my wife.
    "Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes..."

  7. #32
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    I would like to think that a wedding would be more serious, more about the commitment of two people to love each other. Your idea sounds like something for the Jerry Springer TV show.

  8. #33
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    Do you need a bridesmaid? I'll gladly help
    Amanda

  9. #34
    Aspiring Member Jackie7's Avatar
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    We married in 2010, second time each and late in life as we are both in our 60s. We married three times in all. First, before 140 family and friends at our country digs, big tent in the yard, of course I wore panties but otherwise traditional man in new suit with woman in lovely dress. Two days later, just the two of us for a quiet legal wedding with a local judge, similarly dressed as before, because our original officiant was not actually certified in our state. Then two weeks later a cross-dress wedding at a weekend festival not far away, but this time with me as the bride in a white dress and my sweetie in her business suit, 35 guests, I think seven or eight of them were at both 'public' weddings. All three weddings were rich and meaningful to both of us in their different ways. I loved being the bride and cherish my bridal photos.

    Not to derail the thread, but I would like to add that this was possible because I was out as a CD to my wife the first time I met her in 2002, and dressed en femme the second time, before our first actual date. there were no surprises, she knew from the start, and she had the chance to decide it was fine with her before we became entangled. I realize this is not the situation of most folks here, but if you was to ask my advice on how to proceed it would be to get out front with the news and skip the deep and fretful secret.

  10. #35
    Valley Girl Michelle789's Avatar
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    This is something that has to be discussed between the bride and the groom. I would think that the bride should have the final say, since after all she wants a groom. If you really want to be a bride at your wedding, this is something I would discuss fairly early in in your relationship before getting engaged. How far do you want to take your CDing?
    I've finally mastered the art of making salads. My favorite is a delicious Mediterranean salad.

  11. #36
    Patti patti.jean's Avatar
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    When Katherine and I where married five years ago we had two weddings. The first wedding was a traditional wedding then two weeks later we had a second wedding. The second wedding was at TG Weekend at the Dunes Resort, where we both wore wedding dresses. It was a great experience that still makes me emotional as I type this. Here are a few photos of me in my wedding dress.
    Attached Images Attached Images
    Last edited by patti.jean; 07-30-2014 at 10:25 AM.
    It's not about gender it's about fashion www.flickr.com/photos/9438546@N08/sets

  12. #37
    Silver Member Rhonda Jean's Avatar
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    I wore a tux. I rolled my hair, but just wore it in a ponytail, so it was just straighter than usual. Not really noticeable in a ponytail.

    Years ago I happened on to a website chronicling a couple's commitment ceremony. They'd had a traditional wedding weeks earlier, but had another for the husband to be the bride. They went all out with the whole bride and wedding experience. Many family and friends attending, including children. It was beautifully photographed. She had long hair, and it showed her arriving from the salon with her hair in an updo and makeup done. The photos that struck me were of her mother helping her with her dress and hair. It was just beautiful!

  13. #38
    Claire Claire Cook's Avatar
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    We were married in a small traditional ceremony 46 years ago. Most of our family could not attend. When we reach the big Five-Oh, I've been thinking of renewing our vows and doing it big with having our family and friends. Out of consideration for my family, who do not know Claire, we'd do it the traditional way.

    But if the occasion arose, I've love to wear a dress to someone else's wedding!
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] Proud member of the Lacey Leigh Fan Club

  14. #39
    Aspiring Member Jenny Elwood's Avatar
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    I don't want to be the spoilsport or anything but this whole debate is a bit silly to me. Personally I will never wear a wedding dress. Sure I will look at wedding dresses and appreciate their beauty. And maybe at times in my life I would have like to try one on. But I will never do it. Why? Because of the significance of it when my wife wore hers 12 years ago. It was the gift wrapping when she gave herself to me. If I now wear a wedding dress who am I "giving" myself to? Marriage to me is sacred and should not be cheapened. Sorry, but my beautiful wife will always be the only bride in our house.

  15. #40
    mom's "daughter" KarenNY's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by patti.jean View Post
    When Katherine and I where married five years ago we had two weddings. The first wedding was a traditional wedding then two weeks later we had a second weeding. The second wedding was at TG Weekend at the Dunes Resort, where we both wore wedding dresses. It was a great experience that still makes me emotional as I type this. Here are a few photos of me in my wedding dress.
    You look absolutely beautiful and so happy, Patti Jean!
    "Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes..."

  16. #41
    Silver Member CynthiaD's Avatar
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    I've only been married once. I bought the ring, which essentially ended my active involvement in the affair. My wife, her mother, and her sisters planned an executed everything else. My duty was to show up when and where I was told. My feeling was WTF have I gotten into? We've been married for over 30 years, so I guess it was OK. No, I wasn't en femme. I wore what my wife told me to wear. Sigh.

  17. #42
    Senior Member Jennifer in CO's Avatar
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    I have to add a note - when I transitioned, my wife bought me a nice ladies ring set. When I transitioned back, it was the last thing I quit wearing. Actually, most of the time I just wore the wedding band half till we could get my "male" ring resized.

  18. #43
    The Girl Next Door Sally24's Avatar
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    I posed this question to my wife in that we are planning a renewal ceremony sometime in our future. Her response was "I married you, not her". She and Sally are friends but I am her husband. I had to ask! lol
    Sally

  19. #44
    Silver Member giuseppina's Avatar
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    I would be opposed unless I was satisfied it would not be a point of conflict in the future. Quite a few genetic ladies would feel as though their toes are being stepped on on this one.

  20. #45
    Crossdresser-At-Large BillieAnneJean's Avatar
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    Amazing how the wedding has become the bride's event. The ring, the dress, the ceremony, the reception. When and how did it get so far under the control of the marketing people? The adverts say that the groom should spend three months salary on the ring! The total amount spent is really out of proportion.

    But the reality is some GGs are totally swept up in "their day" and the groom may later on wish he had let her have that day with her as the focus. My advice would be to keep it traditional as that leaves less chance that anything non traditional might be regretted later.

    BTW my SO is the whole world to me and I would never consider anything but her and me-he at any function like a renewing of the vows or anything that could be done traditionally. But I much prefer being in guy when with her because then I can enjoy her femininity and openly do all the hugging, kissing, holding, and girl/guy things that personally I prefer to do with her as a guy. Yes we do girl-gurl occasionally mostly because it is a Grand Rapids Crossdresser Social Group event that is open to SOs. But if I was getting married to her again or for the first time, which I would happily do, I would keep it traditional. All my preferences.

  21. #46
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    when my wife and I married, it was very traditional except I wore women's pants that looked male , panty hose and other great women's clothing under the guy stuff. until just now ,no one else knew!
    Pink is more than a color: its an attitude!

  22. #47
    Super Moderator char GG's Avatar
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    My husband wore a white tux and looked amazing (like a blonde James Bond) - very cool and sexy. He took my breath away just to look at him. I will always cherish the sight of him standing at the alter. I wouldn't have changed a thing except to marry him sooner.

    Nikki, I hope when you marry, you have the wedding of your dreams. It's the beginning of a journey and it's the journey that counts.

  23. #48
    heaven sent celeste26's Avatar
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    It seems that given a large very expensive wedding with guests coming from many places, and few of them in on the secret, that tells me a groom should be dressed in regular formal attire, far too many factors to figure out and it wont create a scene.

    Small weddings with only a few people who are all in on the secret and accepting could easily be a venue for two brides. It just adjusts upward the price for everything, wedding gowns can be very expensive. Also factor in who is buying the gown.
    Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. Mark Twain

  24. #49
    Senior Member Gretchen_To_Be's Avatar
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    When my wife and I married, I was in my Dress Blues (formal Army uniform) and she was in a gorgeous gown with some amazing foundation garments below. If (hopefully when) we rededicate ourselves to each other (likely the 20-year mark, in a few years), I'm thinking it would be kinky for us to wear matching lingerie and stockings. Nobody would be any the wiser, and I think it would somewhat ironic and thrilling to juxtapose a macho military façade with feminine finery underneath. Back in the "honeymoon" suite I would of course have a matching pair of heels, peignoir, etc. stashed. I may have to run the concept by her...hoping she will think the private and illicit nature of this outweighs breaking gender norms...

  25. #50
    Vino, Vidi, Vici! Renee Elise's Avatar
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    Interesting idea....Amanda love that thought of being a bridesmaid lol. I agree with many of the posts that the wedding day is totally about the wife and groom...if my honey was comfortable with my femme persona then maybe she and I could gave a girls night out or something in secret. Thing is I like being a guy when I'm with girls...on the other hand though I can see the allure of all the silky finery and the glamorous aspect of it all . Maybe a secret photoshoot...her in the gown, me in the bridesmaid dress .

    Quote Originally Posted by Shibumi View Post
    When my wife and I married, I was in my Dress Blues (formal Army uniform) and she was in a gorgeous gown with some amazing foundation garments below. If (hopefully when) we rededicate ourselves to each other (likely the 20-year mark, in a few years), I'm thinking it would be kinky for us to wear matching lingerie and stockings. Nobody would be any the wiser, and I think it would somewhat ironic and thrilling to juxtapose a macho military façade...
    Shibumi, first thank you for your service . Secondly this gave me a hearty chuckle...no one would have a clue, it would be great! Your wife is a special lady you're both blessed .
    Last edited by Katey888; 08-03-2014 at 05:43 PM. Reason: Consecutive posts merged - please use edit post to add to existing post rather than adding a successive post...

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