Confused

[Ashley Wray]

My name is Ashley Wray and I started cross dressing semi and went to an adult theater and noticed that was getting hit on a lot. I did this for like 6 months and started slowly messing around some touching things like that. Keep in mind for years I was straight as an arrow and love woman. After playing a round bit by bit over the months decided to go further and dress all the way wig make up whole nine yards but never had the nerve to go out in public. I posted an ad out of curiosity but no pics and I got a few hits and the were asking for pics. So I made some and sent them, well the reaction was so good that I posted just the body pics on my ad. Now the hits are coming in faster than I can keep up. So I posted some with a little face but not enough to recognize me and the hits picked up more so. I have now in the last week slept with 2 guys (Protected of course) and love it! I get hit on way more dressed as a girl than did by girls as a guy. The guys are such gentleman and treat me a like a lady. I had one guy that just wanted to take pictures of me and one that wanted to pay me to take a day off work to spend with him. I didn't though don't want to be a prostitute. I still am attracted to and love woman but also get in the mood to dress up and be with men, more men now than woman. The weird thing is its not just sex I think its so exciting when they hit on me hold the door call me baby and sweetie and go out of their way for me. Attention I never got from a girl as a guy, they even want to buy me things.

Any way the thing is I cant figure out where this is going and now am deciding in my mind which guys like based on looks and personality so now it is more than sex. I'm so scared I might be gay but think definently BI.

Is this normal for crossdressing? Has anyone had similar experiances? I love it a lot but the whole package not just sex, I also finding myself open to a boyfriend????? wha the heck? The only clincher is that I can only be with men dressed as a woman but I think about them now even when I'm not but I think about girls too but more in an admiring way rather than so sexual like before. don't know what's happened to me and it scares me a little so just looking to see if anyone can relate or shed light on the road im headed?

[hope springs]

Its ok to explore your sexuality. Many have reported being straight and then experimenting. Some say it wasnt for them, others love it. Your orientation is a very important part of you. Id suggest talking to some women and seeing if you feel a spark. Everyone loves attention so question whether its the attention your getting or does your heart truly desire men.

[Beverley Sims]

You are discovering your own sexuality.
Try a relationship with a woman as well and ask questions about yourself.
You may have more satisfaction with men and if so just remember to stay safe.
Try relationships just for company and without sex, see if this is satisfying.

[Gypsy Sam]

Enjoyed reviewing your thoughts about your sexuality. Physical attractiveness must be your calling card to others. Discovering a need for bisexuality seems to be the result of choosing to semi cross dress at a adult theater, and posting an ad. Which came first the chicken or the egg? Some dip their toe in the water,others wade in much deeper. Adapt to your situation and perhaps a loving relationship will come your way. Guessing your not ready for one yet.

[devida]

Hey, it is okay to be bisexual. I think most cross dressers at least fantasize sometimes about having exactly the sort of experiences you describe. So you go a bit further and actually have the fantasy in real life. Good for you. Stay safe, be careful, verify your dates, make sure somebody other than your date always knows where you are, with whom and for how long, and have fun. For lots and lots of guys going out with a genetic male presenting as a woman is a huge fantasy that you make a reality. Avoid the scumbags and have fun with the gentlemen. Don't worry about your sexual orientation. You could be gay, you certainly are bi, you could be pansexual, you could just like people. It doesn't matter. What matters is whether you are happy and safe doing it. It sounds like you are, so have fun. Believe me there's not a few people on this forum who envy you. When you post over 10 posts you will be able to wander around the forum at will and you will discover the tremendous diversity, acceptance and friendliness here. I encourage you to post. You are in the right place.

[emily606]

I'd be more worried that you're not being honest to yourself than worried about whether or not you're gay. If you're attracted to men only when dressed as a woman, to me that suggests you're using crossdressing as a shield to allow your gay feelings to come out. I'd suggest you find a way to accept whatever your feelings really are. You may love both men and women, but if I were in your shoes, I'd want to find a way to be honest with everyone...especially yourself and those who love you.

Emily

[kimdl93]

Generally speaking gender presentation and sexual preference are separate things. Lots of folks like you express the idea that they only are interested in men and sexual contact with men while dressed. I would like to politely suggest that you're using the clothes as a way to gain "permission" to live out homosexual desires. It's like people who say, I only smoke when I'm drinking...yeah, well, that's called smoking.

There is nothing wrong with being gay or bi. There is plenty of reason for you to take extreme caution in selecting partners....on line ads (other than legitimate dating sites like Match.com) attract a high percentage of predators and irresponsible people. You are risking your health, believe me, yo do not want to catch HIV, and possibly your life.

[donnalee]

Sorry, but I feel the line unreeling as the boat passes.

[Ashley Wray]

Thanks for all the nice and non judge mental replies. A little confused on the on about the line and the boat. As far as being honest I need to clarify the ad I ran was cd for male I did not advertise as a woman so I have been honest to anyone I have met myself is another story.

[Desirae]

You enjoy what you enjoy and you need what you need. What's the big deal? I understand its a big deal to you. I get that. To me, your situation seems like more than just compensating for the lack of affection you are or have been receiving from women. Why be scared of being yourself? Who knows, it might run it's course in due time and then you'll be right back where you started.