something's different

[MissVictoria]

For the first time in several months, I got dressed up and headed to a local weekly CD party by my house. I have been to this get together a dozen times, if not more, in the past. It's never been horrible, but not terribly exciting, either. I usually alternate this party, then a night at one of the casinos, alone. When I was going out regularly, it was once a week, on Saturdays. It has been a couple of months because I changed my schedule at work and have been working nights. Anyway, I went out last night to this party, which takes almost an hour to get to. When I got there, I stayed maybe an hour before getting back into my car for the drive back. I could not take sitting in a room full of like minded cd's and admirers. It just put me in a foul mood, and I couldn't wait to leave. These people see each other every week, and all they could talk about was their shoes, or their dresses or what perfume they were wearing. Nonsensical twitter between them, with no direction for the conversation. Maybe I have gotten used to going out to the casinos by myself, and having conversations with total strangers and enlightening them to the world of crossdressing. I have spent many an hour talking to a group of people whom otherwise wouldn't have ever spoken to someone like me. I appreciate that even if we disagree. I have always preferred to be by myself, but when I started this hobby of mine, I couldn't wait to get out and make friends. But something's different now.

[Beverley Sims]

Victoria,
Your tastes do change and mature a little, conversations I get into with others center around our lifestyle and relationships.
Dressing and makeup tips come into the mix but in a constructive way.
Funny and odd situations are also discussed.
In a gg group I get fun poked at me in a light hearted way, if it cuts close to the bone just let it slip and go on to the next subject under discussion.
Also in a GG group the girls soon forget your sexual identity as long as you play it cool and don't try to make centre stage all the time.
That is a good way to get ostracised.

[kimdl93]

It doesn't really matter if you ate out among CDers or get out in public, so long as you have an opportunity to socialize. We are all social animals...a bit of human contact is essential. I wouldn't be too hard on the folks taking shop...afterall, it's a part of what we do and sometimes the small talk is just that...like chimps grooming each other...but it serves a purpose too...getting individuals comfortable with each other.

[CarlaWestin]

What might be going on is that, now that you've pushed the envelope to go out as a woman and socialize, your true inner self needs a higher level of intellectual stimulation. I can just tell by the correct grammar and wonderful flow of your post that you just don't suffer the linear chitter chatter that some view as socializing. How much can you comment about the weather? Another clue was your mention of, "I have spent many an hour talking to a group of people who otherwise wouldn't have ever spoken to someone like me. I appreciate that even if we disagree." I have a small circle of friends I enjoy conversing with because, although their political or religious views are completely 180 degrees from mine, they respect the richness of the conversations. The events with the CD groups could be viewed as a coming out step. I don't see any reason why you can't embrace a broader spectrum of human interaction while emulating your female persona. Unless you have like a giant mustache or something.

[MissVictoria]

Thank you, ladies, for your insightful thoughts. When out at the casino, or mall, or wherever I may be, I don't feel I take center stage. I do feel, however, that my CD is a primary topic of conversation, at least until the ice has been broken. I tend to not draw attention to myself when out and about (so no giant mustache with my mini and heels!), but will not hesitate engaging in dialogue with someone who has the courage to approach a cross dresser with legitimate questions. I also have no qualms in discussing why I do, what I do, with men or women. I have found men to be far more curious than women, and significantly more confused when I tell them the reason I dress is because I am so straight, and adore women so much, I want to look like one!

I also understand that inane banter is a part of socializing, but when it's the same people, week after week, discussing the same thing, it tends to get monotonous. There is almost a feeling of high school girl syndrome, where it's talking about the latest jeans, or dresses or whatever.

I think in the future, my outings will just remain in the mainstream, and entail spreading the gospel of CD'ing to the masses. Or at least, looking at the girls all dressed up at the bar!! That is the best part of going mainstream, after all.