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Thread: Rejecting men

  1. #26
    Member Cheryl123's Avatar
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    I wouldn't reject anyone simply because they are a man or woman, trans or not. Some people are jerks, most are not. Up close, I'm not particularly passable, but in supermarkets and stores I get more smiles and frowns. Actually most people ignore me. In the "being hit upon contest" I'm actually a dollar ahead of Melissa (lol), but in both cases I found it rather amusing. In bars I tend to be a flirt and some men flirt with me -- some women too -- but it's all in fun. Liten up, please. As for the comment about it being hard on a man to be rejected by a transwoman, I find that rather insulting.

  2. #27
    Silver Member Rhonda Jean's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Badtranny View Post
    If I had a dollar for every time a strange man put the moves on me, ...I'd have just about a dollar.
    How about dinner and a movie?

    A drink after work?

    Lots of drinks after work?

  3. #28
    Valley Girl Michelle789's Avatar
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    In the "being hit upon contest", I am currently $7 ahead of Melissa.

    Oh, and I don't go to bars or clubs. I also spend a lot of time around my boyfriend, so that probably curbs me getting hit on in public. All the times I have been hit on are when I am not with my boyfriend. I don't mean to brag, nor am I complaining. I simply accept it as fact of life.

    The men that have hit on me have ranged from mid 20s to mid 40s.
    Last edited by Michelle789; 08-21-2014 at 01:36 PM.
    I've finally mastered the art of making salads. My favorite is a delicious Mediterranean salad.

  4. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by Badtranny View Post
    LOL

    I don't know what makes it "safe" but it certainly isn't difficult to become a 'member'.
    Nope. I'd be in favor of vetting membership there. Identity disclosed and transitioned, in transition, on HRT, etc.

    THAT might be safe. Not gonna hold my breath, though.

    I've lived in a few different states, but California and especially the SF Bay is a truly special place.
    Yeah, except for the cost of living, the taxes, the earthquakes, the CA economy, the corrupt politics, and a few other charms. Oh, and I froze my butt off the first time I went there. I lived in the Bay Area for a year in college and spent a lot of time in SF. SF is fun (and beats the living hell out of the East Bay and Hayward in particular), but not Nirvana. Glad you're happy with it, though!
    Lea

  5. #30
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    a few weeks of hrt must really be doing wonders for you.

    I've been on hrt for 4 yrs and your already $4 or $5 ahead of me. You must look pretty amazing to get hit on so often!

  6. #31
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    I get hit on often by creepy old men and not often enough by cute guys. I remain polite all the time. Men are only really aggressive with me on line, not so much in person.

    This is going to sound bad, but the only trans women I know who get harassed by aggressive men are the ones who look trans. It's almost like men think of them as prostitutes or service providers and don't extend to them the right of choice to deny.

  7. #32
    Cat's Eye Siren ArleneRaquel's Avatar
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    I'm seldom hit on, but when I'm out and about I am surprised that men, once in a while, start up a conversion with me. It is usually a very nice experience.
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  8. #33
    heaven sent celeste26's Avatar
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    Depends on how rich those old men are before I would reject them. Certain compromises can be made under the proper circumstances.
    Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. Mark Twain

  9. #34
    Junior Member Amanda1128's Avatar
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    I agree with previous post. If your current relationship doesn't work out, you will want to be hit on.

  10. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Frances View Post

    This is going to sound bad, but the only trans women I know who get harassed by aggressive men are the ones who look trans. It's almost like men think of them as prostitutes or service providers and don't extend to them the right of choice to deny.
    That's just terrific! Everyone do your very best to not look trans!

    Let's be honest,many if not most,unless we are genetically gifted or started hrt at a young age along with multiple surgeries will never pass that test.

    Ps: Sorry to make this post after such a long hiatus but that really hit home.

  11. #36
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    I knew my post would be misunderstood. I am not saying it's the trans person's fault that they look trans. I am saying that some trans-oriented men act a certain way when they read someone as trans and their private parts tingle.

  12. #37
    Silver Member Angela Campbell's Avatar
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    sheesh, men are easy, I can get hit on or be left alone simply by using the right "look". A nice friendly smile seems to mean you are hot to trot, but the right glare will run them off really quick.

    Don't know if it works the same for the gals since I only smile at them......
    All I ever wanted was to be a girl. Is that really asking too much?

  13. #38
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    If we are talking men that are into trans people, then too many to count and the vast majority are despicable. Seems we have such poor chances that we will take what we can get!

    In the real world possibly one but my wife scared him off, so I will never know.

    Can't wait to see your pic Michelle, I'm very intrigued now.

  14. #39
    Bad Influence mechamoose's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Angela Campbell View Post
    sheesh, men are easy
    Sing it sister! You are being nice, actually.. I'd say most men (note men, not males... in deference to our FtM members) are ****s. 'Easy' is being kind!

    GGs and MtFs (In my experience) have more taste and are more selective. "Men" are like dogs, just as happy humping a leg as anything else.

    Sure, they can be hot, but they have serious issues with standards. }:>

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  15. #40
    In transmission whowhatwhen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LeaP View Post
    Nope. I'd be in favor of vetting membership there. Identity disclosed and transitioned, in transition, on HRT, etc.

    THAT might be safe. Not gonna hold my breath, though.
    I can put my HRT prescription between my boobs and take a pic if that would help but otherwise there is no such thing on the internet as a safe space.
    Everything has a risk.

  16. #41
    Bad Influence mechamoose's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by whowhatwhen View Post
    I can put my HRT prescription between my boobs and take a pic if that would help
    It would start a meme, honey!

    Go for it!

    - MM
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    "I yam what I yam and tha's all what I yam." -- Popeye the Sailor
    "If I am not for myself, who will be for me? And when I am for myself, what am 'I'? And if not now, when?" - Hillel the Elder

  17. #42
    Just A Simple Girl Michelle.M's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by whowhatwhen View Post
    I can put my HRT prescription between my boobs and take a pic if that would help but otherwise there is no such thing on the internet as a safe space.
    Everything has a risk.
    We can show pics of our boobs here? I'm in!
    I've gone to find myself. If I should return before I get back keep me here to wait for me so I don't go back out and miss myself when I return.

  18. #43
    Gold Member Kaitlyn Michele's Avatar
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    you know just because a guy likes his men to look like women doesn't make him despicable... men are genetically programed to pursue mates/lovers...it doesn't make them predators...

    lots of guys are creepy, lots are not...in fact i'd say the creepy "admirer" ratio is approximately 1:1 to creepy transsexuals.....

    what's so bad about being hit on anyway?

  19. #44
    Silver Member Kathryn Martin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaitlyn Michele View Post
    you know just because a guy likes his men to look like women doesn't make him despicable... men are genetically programed to pursue mates/lovers...it doesn't make them predators...

    lots of guys are creepy, lots are not...in fact i'd say the creepy "admirer" ratio is approximately 1:1 to creepy transsexuals.....

    what's so bad about being hit on anyway?
    I really agree with what you are saying here. Every person is genetically programmed to pursue potential mates/lovers. And only a few are predatory about it. There is nothing wrong whatsoever to be hit on. In real life those you have zero attraction to, will likely find hard to get you to respond in any way that would encourage them and those that you find attractive, you will encourage to flirt and maybe more.

    There is at least a 1:1 ratio. I could spend a whole week talking about creepy trans persons.

    I also would like to comment on what Frances said. I think it true - guys attracted to trans women will hit on transwomen that are identifyable so, it's their attraction. It's not creepy it's normal that you would seek out those that you feel attracted to.
    "Never forget the many ways there are to be human" (The Transsexual Taboo)

  20. #45
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    Quote Originally Posted by whowhatwhen View Post
    ...there is no such thing on the internet as a safe space.
    Everything has a risk.
    My concern with "safety" is credibility, not exposure or similar. You can get around any identity system, of course, but the number of frauds would dwindle.
    Lea

  21. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaitlyn Michele View Post
    you know just because a guy likes his men to look like women doesn't make him despicable...
    I agree with that.
    What I find despicable though, is finding out you are going to have SRS and totally losing interest, because they have only interest in one thing completely devaluing you as a human being.
    Or being married as they thought you would be happy being a dark secret, as you're not going to do much better.
    Or being propositioned totally inappropriately because you're just seen as a sex object with either no standards, or no prospects of your own.

    Problem is you can't blame them, as there are so many in the trans community acting outrageously and I'm assumed to be the same.

    Thing is most of that is online where people can pretend to be someone else, or act out their fantasies in secret.

    So when I say the real world, I don't mean that out of disrespect. It just doesn't reflect what goes on in my everyday life.

    I believe there is someone for everyone, but that someone should be single and not be ashamed to be seen out with me.

    Is this still on topic lol.

  22. #47
    In transmission whowhatwhen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by LeaP View Post
    My concern with "safety" is credibility, not exposure or similar. You can get around any identity system, of course, but the number of frauds would dwindle.
    The last person to have a fake ID here spent a long, long, long time building it up.
    Somehow I don't think circumventing that isn't going to be too hard for someone dedicated enough.

  23. #48
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    It may have already happened again.

  24. #49
    Gold Member Kaitlyn Michele's Avatar
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    i'm sure it has...
    ..just sayin...

  25. #50
    In transmission whowhatwhen's Avatar
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    You're all too paranoid lol.

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